Ep. 93: Desire Study Finalized While Good Girls Go from Blushing to Gushing

Julie from Loveland, Colorado, how can I teach my boyfriend how to pull hair during sex? How do you? Don’t do the top of the head because that’s pretty sensitive. Anything from the crown backwards is good. How do you teach them? Practice, Richard, repetition. This is what I usually do. First of all, if there’s ponytails, I tie them together and I ride them like a little horsey. Perfect. That’s a. A lot of hair. That’s another good point. That’s I feel like that’s acceptable. Yes, it absolutely is. And if they’re, if it’s doggy style, you slap them on the ass. Yeah, yeah, yeeha. Would you say keep it between starting a lawnmower and a head of cotton candy? Yeah, it doesn’t really matter how hard because you can only pull so hard on the hair. I don’t know if that’s true. I brought many women down by their hair. Now this has happened. What if she’s wearing a wig? Do you go with it? No, you put it back on, me or her? No. Put it on. I usually put it on me. Solid, I think. And then I say, Jesus, Kevin, I had no idea you were wearing a wig. We’ll be right back. Whatever you’re doing right now while listening, know that you’re being serviced. Not unlike anyone else getting serviced, we must be touching you in some way. We enjoy servicing you. But imagine feeling like you’re constantly servicing someone for free. I love it, but that doesn’t mean that my jaw doesn’t get sore from talking, or that my hand isn’t carpal tunneled from working that pin, or that my ass isn’t Completely worn out from sitting here all day making content. Again, I love servicing you. I wish I could do it more, to be honest. And getting full service for 5 bucks, that’s a sweet deal, right? But taking it for free, that’s got to make you feel kind of dirty, huh? Stop feeling dirty, in the guilt and go to room 77life.com and become a member for 5 bucks. You still get serviced and so much more. Without all that dirty guilt. There, we just made your life a little better. You’re welcome. Go to room 77life.com and sign up now. And thank you to our newest guilt-free members, New Haven Jeff, Michael, Steph, Ray, Joseph, Dan, John, Jay and Lil, CB Summer Co, Jason, Sandel Weissam, Matt, and well, look at you. I’ll be servicing you all very soon. 77 is how it is said in British English, 77, although in American English it would be pronounced as 77, 77, 77, and now you know. Lauren, welcome back. It’s June. Do you know what that means? It’s officially summer. Summer is in the air. Summer’s in the air. Did I just write a song? I think so, unless it was Frank Sinatra. Summer’s in the air. We have a summer trip that we’re going to, and it is getting very, very close to. Our event, October Sin on Isla Mujeres, which is always like summer. It reminds me of two things. I can’t wait and uh we’re incredibly behind. And also I want to announce right now that we are doing at our event, the first and only ever trademarked trimixer. Now, let me explain this. I can’t wait because this comes up later in this episode, The Adventures of Trimix and Richard. So what we’re going to do is we’re going to have a regular mixer, but we are just going to inject you with a waiver, of course, we’re not idiots. Yeah, we don’t want any, any lawsuits. But what we’re going to do is we’re going to have naked people at the happy hour. And then it’s voluntary. Maybe I haven’t decided. We’re going to have a little booth set up and if you’ve ever been curious about it, we will have the antidote with us and and you you or somebody else, maybe we’ll actually have a real nurse, maybe a real doctor. I don’t know, we’ll ask around. You’re totally going to dress up like a nurse. I’m totally going to dress up like a nurse. My lipstick is going to be so bright red. A regular mixer, it’s gonna be like a normal jacuzzi, except every guy is gonna be rock hard for at least 3 hours. I mean, it’s the longest mixer ever, but they could take it elsewhere. I gotta be honest, I just want to see what happens. This is more like an experiment than anything else. So if you’re interested in the first ever trimixer, you can come and sign up. Well, you can find out about our event at room 77life.com or room 77 events.com. We don’t have anything about the trimixer up there, but you can find out about the event and the trimixer is our special podcast surprise. Surprise. In this episode, we’re going to talk about a trip that we made to desire. We had some actually amazing. Sex and I feel like I got catfished but in a personality way. Like I don’t know if this has ever happened to somebody where you met somebody and you’re like this person’s not up to my sexual speed. I don’t know if this is gonna melt, you know what I mean? I’m a dirty person. I got dirty thoughts. This person’s a little too kindergarten for me, you know what I mean? Yeah, and then I got catfished because she is a dirty little whore. So dirty. Yeah, so we’re going to talk about that. We also redid the tri-mix test. We talked about it last time. Does the hot tub hot water have an effect on doing tri-mix, and we will hear the results of that. Very, very interesting case study, peer reviewed, you’ll hear all of the details above and beyond all of those wonderful things that you’re going to hear. The other thing is we just shed a bunch of friends. That’s, that’s on a positive note. And here’s what we learned. Everybody goes through this, right, where you go through this part of your life where you go, these people are not really friends. They’re assholes. Or there’s agendas or I don’t know, it’s just like you want like your real peeps. And the universe comes along and says, I’m going to take these people out. Right? But here’s what we learned. I’m here to tell the people who have not been in the lifestyle for a very long time, a very important piece of advice that you need to know. We’re here for it because it took me a long time to realize this as well. Let’s just say you’re in a situation where a friend or people you think are friends treat you poorly, right? And then you have other friends who are mutual friends of those friends, or so-called friends, right? And then you’re like, well, whose side are you going to take? What we’ve come to realize is where they will stand is directly correlated with how hot they are. What I mean is, if they’re Pigs, you can rest assured that your friends will be like, fuck them. Yeah, we’re totally on your side. I’m gonna egg their house tonight. It’s bullshit. I can’t believe they did that to you. I’m blowing up their Facebook page. I’m gonna insult their mom. I’m gonna go to their, their kids’ school. I’m gonna fuck their lives up. I’m gonna do everything, leaving the chat. If they’re hot, their reaction sounds a lot like this. Oh man, that’s, that’s sad. That’s, that’s, uh, that’s, uh, it’s really unfortunate. Are you, are you sure that there wasn’t a misunderstanding because there was no misunderstanding. I just didn’t think they would do something like that. Yeah, they, they absolutely did it. So are you with me or are you not with me? I mean, I think the best thing that I I should do is just stay out of it. And by staying out of this, I mean just hang out a little bit this weekend and not bring it up. And you know if they want to play, we’ll play, but I’m not going to like be their best friend. I’m not going to be friends with them or anything, but like I mean still open to fuck them. I mean sex is still on the table. Not gonna be like, you’re really hot while I’m fucking. That’s, yeah, that’s what I’ve learned. And you could say it straight to the face, are you gonna talk to them anymore? OK, OK, you’re trying to fuck him, aren’t you? You know. So, you know, there is this shallow side that you have to deal with that in the non-lifestyle world that doesn’t exist. It’s not a factor. Uh, if a friend of yours fucks you over and a mutual friend, you take one side, their looks have nothing to do with it. The point you go, Kelly, I was horrible what you did. And I don’t, I do not accept what you did to Richard and Lauren. It was really, really shitty. Yeah. And in this world, it’s like, Kelly, your tits look great today, Dave. Anyway, I just wanted to put that out there because I’m sure some of you are out there and they’re like, yep, you got it, Richard and Lauren, once again ahead of the curve. Nailed it nailed it. Been through it, living through it now. As I sit here on this treadmill because I’m tired and I don’t want to run, I know exactly what you’re talking about. I was just going to clarify because you said we went through a friend cleansing, that it’s a, this is a lifestyle friends cleansing, if you want to say that. Well, to be fair, there were, there were 3 different people and, uh, there were 3 different categories. One was an absolute user loser. Next category, absolute racist. Surprise. Just, 00, you’re a racist. Didn’t really want that in our lives. Wasn’t like a casual like, oh, that’s, that’s kind of awkward. It was pretty a lot. It was a lot. And then these other two people who just fall into the opportunistic category, I think they’re the worst kind actually. They’re the sneaky ones. Yeah, it’s the worst kind. But what were you gonna say? They were still hot, still hot. But I, there will be people out there who will say, I know exactly what you’re talking about, Richard. Yeah, I mean, you’re the everyman. There are other people. There are people who are like, they’re a horrible person, but I’m immediately like, I don’t know you. You know what I mean? You’re a stranger to me. They’re still hot. I don’t have any skin in this fight. In fact, I’m hoping to get with them tonight, so I’d rather you not bring this up again for me. So I get the other side of it, but when you’re actually friends with somebody, it really becomes, uh, becomes a thing. But we are cleansed. I feel lighter and we’re ready for summer. Summer. That’s what we were talking about. One of the things that we’re here to talk about is we did take a small trip to Desire, small plug. If you want the best prices and the best travel agent to take care of your trip to Desire, call Lauren or jump into her box. That’s me. Go to room 77life.com and click contact us and shoot me an email. I’m really good at saving you money no matter what price or. Promos out there, send it to me and I will at least match it and give you a free bikini. Another short, fun little trip up to Desire and I got to do my trimix experiment. We were meeting a couple up there. I was very excited to meet them. Really cute couple. We had met them before. We kind of were hoping that we would play with them. We had to do one thing, which was get to know them first. That small, small thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what lovely, lovely people, but we’ll talk about the play session a little bit later. I want to get into my experiment because that was really the most important part of it was a control number 2. You had a, this is a multi-day experiment. If I could remind the listener, one time I went to Desire and I said, hey, honey, I have a great idea. I’m going to take a little bit of Trimix, and I’m going to inject it just to fluff myself up. And I took the Trimix, and I was like, OK, this is fine. Nothing’s really happening. Then I got into the hot tub and who bam, it was like I could cut diamonds with my cock. So I thought, well, let’s try it again with an even smaller dose because that’s what we do as scientists. You make a control. We make a control and we keep trying. This is what we do. It. If that’s a real word, then yes, it’s what we do. The night starts off perfectly. We go to dinner. We usually like the buffet. It was closed that night. Oh yeah, it was premier because the universe. doesn’t like us. So they’re like, go have sushi. So we decided, all right, let’s go have sushi. So we went and we had sushi. We, we made it through our dinner and we decided, all right, let’s go to the club and do our thing and then we’ll make it to the, to the experiment, the laboratory. That’s what we should call it. Oh, that’s so good. Yeah. So we go to the laboratory. It’s not fully packed there. When we went, we didn’t have a lot of distractions. I need, I wanted more distractions because I don’t really like, I like. People watching your experiment. I don’t like them being only focused on my experiment. Now, the last time it was worse because I did my experiment in the day. I purposely waited at night to do this experiment because I thought, well, this will be better. Yeah, sure, sure. All right, so we get in. This is one of the hardest things that we do. Now. This goes all the way back to our nudie beach days. It’s picking a spot in the hot tub. Yes, it is exactly. It’s so difficult and you have to make a decision and go with it almost like, yeah, it’s, it’s because when you walk in. You almost feel like there’s a, there’s an amount of people that turn and look at you and they’re like, Are you going to sit here? And then there’s an amount of people that are like, Don’t sit here. So you’re trying to make this decision of like, they want people near them, they don’t want people near them. And then for me, once I get someplace, I don’t have the balls to move. So I’m like, this is my camp. I’ve chose this. I put a little flag down. I’ve committed. So all of these decisions start going through my head immediately. And there’s not a lot of people in there. You don’t. want to be alone. You also don’t want to be too close, but too far. Yeah, you have to sort of take a geometry of the space and divide it up in a certain way and pick a spot. And then you’re like, oh shit. I pick the attractive couple that I had had my eye on all week long. We didn’t really talk to them that much. We did talk to them a little bit. They were in there. And I immediately start to go over to him and immediately realized, oh, God, you’re with other people. And then I start going back the other way like. Abort, abort, abort. And then I go into my spot and I sit down like that never happened, right? Now we’re stuck in this spot. I don’t want to say stuck, but we’re there, right? I say, OK, let’s sit here for a while and then I will go and I will perform the experiment. I have the dosage ready. It’s in the bag. All I have to do now is pull it out of the bag and perform the injection. So while we’re sitting there, I saw that there were bathrooms outside, which I had never noticed before. And you were like, honey, you’re going to have to go scout. That and see if it’s worthy if I can use that to do my experiment. Otherwise I have to dry off. I have to go inside. Yeah, way better for me, right? This is a whole new wing to my laboratory. I didn’t even know I had. It’s brand new, right? So it’s like, you go, don’t take too long, because we have rules about leaving me in the hot tub too long. There’s a certain amount of time. Yeah, you have to hurry, right? So you go, you come back and you start telling me every story in the world. That’s not what I need to know. You tell me, yeah, it’s, it’s OK for your experiment. It’s unisex. They have the thing you can do everything that you need to do in there. Go do your thing. So all I have to do is go to my little cubbyhole. Love that they have cubbyholes. So I go to my cubbyhole. I can’t get to my cubby hole because people are blocking my cubbyhole. Just at the exact time you show up. There hadn’t been anyone there for 30 minutes, by the way. I can’t get to my cubby hole for like 10 minutes to the point where I’m staring back at you like, I don’t know what to do. I can’t get to my cubby hole, and I’m not gonna stand here and be like, Excuse me, yeah, I just need to get to my syringe. If I could just. How much longer do you need to take your flip flops and shove them in a cubby? Just let’s go, people. People, little PSA, uh, here’s the thing with cubbies. I don’t know if you’ve used them in kindergarten or not. You know, you put your stuff in there and then you go about your day. You walk away. Yeah, here’s what you don’t do. Don’t go to the cubby and dry off. Don’t go to the cubby and start undressing. That’s unnecessary because when you’re standing. there as a human being, you’re covering 3 to 6 cubbies, both tall and wide. You’re blocking a mass part of the cubbies. Do your dressing or undressing or your nails or whatever it is the fuck you’re doing. Do it a few steps back, and then when you have all of your accouterments, then you take them and you put them in the cubby. Approach the cubbies. Is that too much for one sign? It depends. You could probably find a really small font, but then people wouldn’t be able to read it. So yeah, and that happened to me twice, twice in a row. I was walking up once, twice, and it’s just like whatever. I was losing. I was laughing so hard at you and, and because I don’t mind. I mean, a girl can be in the jacuzzi by herself. It’s fine. No one’s, no one was coming over and no one was saying anything. So I’m just sitting there watching you laughing. I, I finally get my. I inject my thing and now last time when I was in there, as soon as I hit the water, boom, it was up. Now I have to tell you there was nothing happening before when I was in there. Nothing. And I was like, I’m gonna go. I did the tiniest, tiniest bit. I think like 0.1, 0.1. I don’t know what that is. It’s just it’s barely in the syringe, barely in the cave. Yeah, it’s nothingness. You’re wasting a syringe doing it. So I go into the bathroom, I shoot it, right, and then I go into the water and I’m sitting there for like, I don’t know, 2 or 3 minutes and wah bam, hard as a rock. The trick is hot water, man. It’s hot water and I, it won’t go down. There’s no way this thing’s going down. Once we’re in there, we’re surrounded at the left by the hot couple, and they have a group of friends. They’re friendly, but they don’t want to be too friendly. I don’t know how else to say that. They’re like friendly, but. They’re not down to orgy tonight kind of friends. Not that I wanted to orgy with them, but they’re like, Hey, we’ll be near you, but we don’t want to talk to you. So it’s like, OK, all right. So now imagine like you’re, you’re in the jacuzzi, and then at the other end there’s like, oh, I’m just going to pick a number. Let’s say there’s 10, right? And then there’s this area that’s just this blank space, right, of nothingness. In walks this incredibly cute young couple. They get undressed. All I’m thinking is, please sit next to us. Please sit next to us, please sit next to us. And I’m like willing them with my mind to sit next to us. And in fact, they do not sit next to us. They sit across from us a ways that is not in any way, uh, flirtatious. It can be mistaken as flirtatious, not in any way, but I can’t stop thinking to myself, how do I get over there? How do I get over there? I can’t, I can’t. It’s literally not inside of me to take myself and you and go, All right, we’re making a family move over next to them. It just looks too obvious. As I’m having that thought, a couple walks over from another part of the hot tub and does exactly that and just plants themselves next to these two. And I thought, the balls. The ball’s on these two, but they’re doing it. I mean, they, they are zero fucks to give, absolutely zero fucks to give. I’m sitting there with a really, really hard cock. I say, all right, well, let’s, let’s start some, some blowjobs. Let’s just see how many. So we start a little blowjobby thing. I mean, the experiment’s basically over at this point. I’ve proved myself right. It’s theory now. Is it theory? I don’t know. I think. It’s proven. It’s not, it’s a proven theory. It’s a proven theory. It’s not a hypothesis. No, OK. It’s scientific data now. We have data points. You’ve written an abstract. So we say, all right, well, now it’s time to go to a bed. Well, we start doing the blowjobs and some people, it starts trickling down. People participate. That’s always kind of fun. There ended up being a couple that was sitting right next to us and they were, but we were still keeping our eye on the young couple. Not taking our eye off the young couple, not crazy. No. So they get up and they move to a bed and then before we tell that story, I, I just, I want to pause for 60 seconds for a few more shameless plugs. What did you have to say about our friends over at Bikini Addiction because we just had our yearly, our annual staff meeting, our staff meetings. And this is also a record for the IRS because this will hold up in court. Yes, we did spend $2000 at lunch. I wrote it off. Yeah, you did. And Brad also paid for his $2000 so he can write his $2000 each, right? And we took limos there, right? Tell everybody the news. Well, I got a new binder full of bikinis, which they always dote on me with. Well, actually, I saw you in one already. It looks, it looks unbelievable. There’s rumor there’s a second limited edition coming out this year, and it might be in my. Bikini binder that I just got. When do we see it? Well, you might catch a glimpse of it on social media if you follow us. When I literally don’t even know. I’m legitimately asking. I know, I know. I’m just going to flip through. I’m not going to wear it because I don’t want to spoil it, but you might see it in my binder. What else? The lava fans, they just got their last batch of lava in. Lava sells really good. Lava. I don’t know if lava sells really good is grammatically correct. Listen, lava is very caveman-like. Lava sell good. Go on. If your lava is faded from chlorine, lots of wear, go grab your size before it goes out because this fabric is no longer going to be made. It is not going to be available. What do they have to do to get that? Go to bikiniaddiction.com and if you want to save 10%, use our code room 77 or you can get a free one if you book your travel with me. Go look up lava. It’s super hot. Also, um, next month in July. Yes, next month we are going to New Jersey. We are going to friction parties with shivers. We’re going to be handing out drugs essentially and other stuff from room 77. We want you to come and get free drugs. I mean, when do you get that opportunity? Free. Are they free? First one’s free. I just said it, so they have to be. Yeah, well, I don’t know if they’re free. I don’t know. I just know that you should come. The day passes are still available. Yeah, come and join us in. Southern Jersey and right outside Philly. It’s friction Parties.com and the party is Aqua July 23rd through the 25th, and it’s a two day pool party. Apparently it’s a lot of fun. Yeah, it’s a big pot crowd. I’m a little intimidated. I am too, but we’re going to be there with shivers. Try to join us if you can. Again, I don’t know if there’s free shivers. We could probably steal some. We know the guy. I know a guy. I can keep him distracted. While I steal some This is what I remember, what happened, because this is my life. So I go, let’s go move over to a bed. No one hears me say it. I said it softly to you. The group of 6 that are next to me loudly proclaims, Let’s all go over to the beds. And I’m like, Motherfucker. Now it looks like we’re following them to the beds. I hate. That feeling like it looks like, oh, well, I’m, I’m gonna follow whatever you guys are doing. Well, we already chose to follow to sit next to them. Oh my God, I’m just, I’m like stalking them at this point and they don’t even want me stalking them. I have so much going on right now, right? The young couple leaves, right? I don’t know where they went. I don’t have an Apple tracker on them. I have no way to know where they went. Fuck it, we have to go to a bed. Let’s just try to get to a bed before they take all the beds. I mean, that’s the only thing that I can do right now is, is go and pick a bed. We pick a bed and, you know, it becomes normal sex. And when I say normal sex, it’s like, all right, which way do you want to face? Which way do you want to face and what do you want to do? Be in this position? Let’s be in that position. Why don’t you face the young couple? There they are, the young couple, right? They, they were fucking off into a corner and we start fucking and going at it and it was all fun. And we had had one other situation that happened a long time ago. I don’t even know if we recorded it. It happened at Desire Pearl. And I never thought that this situation would be beat in my life. And I digress. A long, long time ago, we were in the beds playing. Fucking, literally in the middle of fucking, a man, the curtains were closed and a man came up while we were fucking and tied our curtains back to open them. And I thought, holy shit, that was ballsy. I couldn’t believe it. And if that wasn’t enough, then waited a good 3 minutes and while I was inside of you, fucking you, walked up with a cigarette in his mouth. Do you have a light? And I remember looking, looking at my naked body and looking at him dead in the eye and going, no, go to the bar. Where would I be keeping that? Anyway, so we didn’t think that could be beat. Now the guy, the couple that we considered hot, that we talked to that was, that I was looking at to sit next to in the hot tub, slamming you from behind. I see him look at us from beyond. He’s on his way out. And I see him look at us. I was like, oh, he’s just going to take one lap. Look before he goes. And then he starts walking over to us and I’m still mid fuck. He comes to the edge of the bed. I’m still thrusting and he says, Hey, so how can I, uh, how can I get in touch with you guys? Do you guys have a, you guys have Facebook or anything like that? I’m like, I, I, I, I, I literally can’t even remember my Facebook name at that point because it threw me so off. I, I, I honestly, I don’t even remember what do you remember what I said? I really don’t. I don’t remember what I said. I remember saying to you, get it out of your mind. Get it out of your mind, get it out of your mind because something like that could really, really. Oh, it puts me right back at a one again. I got to start all over with my orgasm rant. Whatever it was, we’ve clearly communicated a method to get in touch with us. And the saddest part, never reached out. Maybe, maybe we gave him the wrong name. He never reached out. Never reached out. That’s the saddest part of this. Like I would have made it a little bit worth it, where I was like, in my mind I was like, yeah, that was kind of awkward, but kind of funny, man. It was great meeting you too. You guys were pretty hot. Nope, I didn’t even get that pleasure. All I got was you in my face in that moment. It’s a memory. Do you think that there’s a chance at all that he was like, Maybe if I ask something super ridiculous, then they’ll say, join us. Yes. Just like, will you just watch us for a sec while I come on her face? I don’t think so. No, because he was with that group. He’s also with his his wife or partner, whoever he was with. And they were clearly on the way out. All of them were like 1 ft out, 1 ft out the door. All of them. I don’t think he would have been like, Oh, you guys go ahead. Like it wasn’t that kind of vibe. He seemed like he was in a rush to come back and get this out and then get back on his way. So it wasn’t like he was lingering or it was just a bad line. It was, I don’t know what it was, except awkward and interruptive and now what it seems just a waste of time, I guess, because I don’t even know who he was, to be honest, um, uh, the young couple, we were leaving the next day, so we never met them. When I say young, they were really young, like in their. Yeah, they’re in their late twenties. That was never going to happen anyway, but you know, you always got to have something to fight for. Look at while you’re fucking because we were looking at each other and that was kind of fun. That’s fun. That’s enough sometimes. If you guys haven’t been to RM and the new section, the new jacuzzi, those day beds when you’re fucking make the craziest sound that kept. In the beginning, it sounds because there’s like these little shutter things on the top on the top that are like they’re little blinds like you can open a tiny sunroof if you want. The way that they’re made, it’s like this metal, so you start fucking in these little slidy sunroof things. They start banging on each other and I kept looking around like, who’s moving first? Yeah, it sounds like someone is constantly moving tables around furniture around you that caught me. It took me a few times to go, it’s just the sound. The other thing that’s great is how geniusly designed it is acoustically. The music doesn’t play in the play section. So in that section, it’s just silence. Well, you got your sound. You got your sunroof sound. That’s one. You just hear that noise and some people whispering. Yeah, they’re whispering like a library whispering. Yeah, so there’s some, I have some notes. I just, I just have some notes. That’s that the best sex we had. was with the couple that we went there for, which wound up being an absolute complete surprise. Even just hanging with them and getting to know them, but good God, that sex session. I still get nervous, by the way, you didn’t really seem nervous at all. I get nervous too. I just handle it differently. Like I’m a Navy SEAL. That’s that’s where I have to go. I really do. And the trimix helped a lot because what used to be sheer panic, that now, now I can be a Navy SEAL. Yeah, you have your. Tactical gear. Yeah, that is my tactical gear. This particular couple, we like we had said, we had met them before. And so we didn’t really know them. But when we did meet them, everything that we thought about them was inexperienced, new to the lifestyle, and we’re probably a little bit too much for them. That’s, that’s all that we thought when we met them. Extremely nice. And I was looking very, very forward to actually hanging out with them. Did you feel the same? Well, yeah, I mean, besides the fact they were. they were young and gorgeous. They were a gorgeous looking couple. Yeah, they’re really, really pretty, very attractive couple. And that was more than half of the reason that I wanted to be there because I’m shallow. We all are, Richard. But you know, you go in with that feeling and you’re like, OK, that part’s there, but is it going to click? You know, the worst thing to her detriment, she’s the worst texter ever. So we had a group chat. She just doesn’t participate. It’s like, I don’t want to be a part of this little group. So going in. And it’s pretty much the three of us chatting. So despite having high hopes, I also think that maybe she’s not really into this. Like there was a thinking because no texting and maybe in for like, yeah, you’re nice, but we weren’t going there. Yeah, you got the wrong idea. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I was ready for. Yeah, I was too actually, which was fine because I’m OK with that. It’s not like we planned our trip to run into them. I had a whole experiment to take care of. I was busy anyway. I’m in the lab, people. Yeah, I had a lot of work to do. There’s a lot of data. There’s a lot of logging. People don’t even know. So anyway, so we started hanging out with them and more pleasant than I ever expected. They were just really, really easy to talk to that I couldn’t shut up. Her, so easy to talk to. I wanted to bring her home with us and run my life. I want her to be next to me and tell me what to do at every step. She was, she’s good at making decisions, even like we’re like, do you want to go to? Lunch or do you want to eat later? Maybe we could eat lunch together. And it was like, yeah, absolutely. Let’s go over here and we’ll sit inside and I’m going to order this and and not a selfish bone in her body. What do you want to do? Is that better for you? Then let’s do that. And positive. So with a positive. Yeah. But at the same time, in all of this is no sense of sexuality because there is a sense of kindness. Sweetness, but no real sense of sexuality to the point where I’m like, I don’t know if they’re really nice and getting along with them really well, but I don’t know if there’s any sexualness here that I can cling on to. I’m already bad with flirting. So I’m not making anything better. I made a decision at one point where I’m like, oh, I have to say something to them. And I did this by saying in a very simple, I was like, how many experiences have you really had? I was expecting, what were you expecting? Um, 3, yeah, that’s, I don’t know why. I was expecting like, or, well, we haven’t really played yet, not officially, or we just did our first one to lo and behold, they were like, yeah, we got around. Yeah, we have plenty of experience. And we’re like, oh, and I think he understood immediately where we’re coming from because he was like, don’t misunderstand. This one hits a switch and it’s night and day. Whatever you’re seeing out here. This is not who she is in the bedroom. We’re like, OK, Charlie. We’re like, Oh, because you’re so sweet. And like we didn’t mean it in a negative way, but he knew exactly because he’s just started laughing with us. It’d be quite the cover. I don’t think anybody would be this good, but OK, we’ll see. Anyway, that second night, we decide that we’re just going to forget the whole night doing the night thing and we’ll just spend the night doing sex stuff. So we hang out a little bit. A little bit, we decide we’re going to go back to their room, which usually is not my preference. I don’t know what your preference is usually. I mean, nowadays, I feel like our room’s more equipped because we have lights and we have a speaker. We’re guaranteed like we know we have a good speaker and stuff. And these are questions that we ask now. They say our room and we say, do you have, here’s a checklist. Do you have these items? Fill this out and rate on a scale of 1 to 10, how good is your speaker, and we’ll let you know what the location will be. So you know we have all of those things and we’re, we’re ready for your arrival. And we were like, OK, we’re just gonna go back to our room, we’re gonna freshen up and we’ll meet you over there and we got the room number and by the way, just a small segue. I don’t know if every other woman in the world does this, but do you know that when you’re going back to the room. To transition from just sort of normal night to sex night. Do you know that there’s an acceptable amount of time to transition, or do you think that you could take 2 hours if you wanted? Like, do you know that there’s a 15 minute window is what I would say. Do you keep track of that? No, I’m not good with time, but I feel like I. Keeping track of it. What’s going through your mind at that point? Like, I’ll just keep getting ready and then time will go by and I feel like you’re watching the time for me, which I, you do. So even when I say, let’s go, let’s go, let’s go, that still is like, OK, I just have to fill in the blank with whatever. Like I can’t understand how that hasn’t happened yet. I’m just putting that out there now because I understand. I’m not very conscientious at the time. It would be nice if there were giant clocks or your body clock. I mean, it’s just like it’s 15 minutes. My body clock is not working after, yeah, but like after 15 minutes, you’re like, yeah. I just have to put on some, something. You’re like, how did you not do that 15 minutes ago? I don’t. Anyway, we walk over to their room. Also, one of the highlights of the night. We walk into their room and it’s like I’m in a different hotel. Talk about room transitions, desire home makeover. That should be a thing. I mean, I felt like I should do some move that bus pan shot. Like it was unbelievable. Like what hotel is this? You should changed light bulbs that I was like, I want to stay in this room. This is gorgeous. And everything was so neatly. I didn’t want to touch anything in there. It was so absolutely perfect. She even laid like rolled towels out on the like TV cabinet or whatever. She had bottles of water out for us. It was like she was a true host. The housekeeper wasn’t taking notes. They should have taken photos of that room and been like, this is what we should be doing and all done for under $15. Amazon add to cart. So it was beautiful. It looked sexy. It was gorgeous. And we started with a little bit of gal on gal, which is always great. I just sit and jack off with one of my favorite moves. We walked up, they were standing at the edge of the bed and just making out and it was such a beautiful silhouette that I was just so turned on by her body. She was like a porn star and a model had a baby, and she was just stunning to me. I’m very situational, I guess with girls. It’s like sometimes I’m just like, I just want to ravage people. And then other times I’m like, yeah, I’ll kiss and that’s fine. And with her body, it was just like it was so gorgeous. I just wanted all of it. And so I just kind of jumped on. Yeah, you two looked very, very sexy together. It was, it was extremely hot. I really enjoyed it. Couldn’t believe the turn. Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Whore. It was unbelievable. I mean, she turned into one of the dirtiest whores I’ve ever been with. And that is my alley. That is like when you are the gal, that’s like, use me, abuse me. I, that’s my sweet spot. Whenever and there’s a psychology to it as well. Interesting. Well, because for me, when you put a guy in, in that situation, that’s when a woman’s. Like, well, I just feel it doesn’t feel right. Or maybe that’s not, oh, I just don’t really like that and I need to feel the right energy. You’re very on eggshells kind of just stepping around. Yeah, it’s it’s, it’s very inhibited. Yeah, that makes sense. But when, when a woman comes from a place of like, toss me around like a rag doll, because that’s what’s going to get me off and you’re like, just use me. It gives you this freedom to just go. It’s, it’s that selfish lover part. She’s being selfish. I’m being selfish, boom, you get to have great sex. Right. So that’s what happened between the two of us. I don’t know what was happening between the two of you because I wasn’t looking. I was too busy selfishly fucking the shit out of her verbally talking about feeling my cock inside of her is such a turn on ladies, ladies, hearing that is such a turn on, like, just write that down, ladies. It just is. It’s like to know that. It’s a lot better than hearing, Are you in yet? That’s not what you want to hear. She was a squirter. Yeah. She was squirting all over my body, uh, which isn’t usually one of my favorite things. But again, it was like, it was just cock was hitting the right spot. Depends how the squirting’s happening. You know, I don’t like it as a novelty trick. That’s what I don’t like. I don’t like it when we’re doing it like we’re at a carnival, and we’re like, win a cup, make me squirt. That’s when I’m like, yeah, kind of weird. Just let’s not do that. You know what I mean? I I don’t want to do that. I don’t want to make things fly out of you for let’s not, it’s not test it. Well, I, while y’all were doing that, I had him pinned down. We were making out pretty intensely was such a good kisser and his cock was gorgeous. And it was perfect because it didn’t have a curve. Cerve like yours did, which I always love kind of different cocks, because especially with him, I was able to be on top and with you, we have difficulty in that position, right? Because you’re afraid of your dick. Well, yeah, because when you come down, it can’t fold in half, right. Well, he had like the Eiffel Tower. So I was on top of him, just riding him. I got so. sweaty. We were both so sweaty. He was like pinning my hips down and just grinding and I was riding them and making out at the same time and just glancing over at you guys. And it was just everything was so hot, literally hot. Every person at one point got up and kept turning the air conditioner down. It wouldn’t go down anymore because it got so, so absolutely hot in there. I was a sweaty mess. So then it ends with Him wanting to come and I’m like, I want to come on her face, right? And so we wind up over her face and trying to, well, you asked her, like, where do you want us to come? And she said, my face and you’re like, fuck yes, I love it. Yeah, so um wound up I couldn’t come. I don’t know if it was, I don’t know what it was. I was just going too long. I just, I was a little too numb. I couldn’t. I don’t know what it was. Sometimes you just can’t. No, it’s, it’s usually not that common for me. I will usually come very quickly. Did I come that day? I think I came that day. Yeah, so we just had sex like 6 hours earlier, which every guy’s like 6. Yeah, well, you know, you mix in substances and stuff. But anyway, so he came on her. The amount of volume that came out of him made me question if I was even a man. It made you reach out to AI. That’s for sure. It did. It did. I know. And so you’re gonna put me on a vitamin regimen to build up my juices. I still haven’t started yet, but, um, I had to ask like, what is normal, and you had asked him, did he, did he come today? And he said no. Yeah, that was the first they said normally we’ve already, he’s already come once or twice, and he said today I didn’t. Yeah, so there was a, there’s a list of trying to make you feel better, I think. You, you had listed a bunch of vitamins and supplements and stuff on our Patreon to boost ejaculate, right, which I haven’t had to make a whole post about. The hardest part is going out and buying them, to be honest. I would do it every day and put them in my little pill box, but I got to buy them first. This is why I need Lily, my pill getter. People are like, just go to Amazon, but it’s not that easy in Mexico. Vitamins aren’t really like a huge thing here. Yeah, or you go to Amazon, just get fake cum because you could do that too. Also a possibility. This is a great lesson in always don’t judge a book by its cover. This little librarian was a little whore, and sometimes the other way too. It it sometimes works the other way. Most of the time, actually. They’re big talkers and then big talkers and they get in the bed and there’s nothing going on. And you’re like, Oh, what a letdown. Just give me a little something, a squeal, a squirt, something. Open your eyes. Oh God, you know, yeah, so it’s, it’s free talking. Talking. That’s one of your, a real positive for you. And for you again, honestly, I don’t remember anything you’re doing. I know, I know we fucked a little bit. You’re welcome. So I had a great time. I think we fucked them good enough because they wound up booking our event. So I’m proud of that. I’m proud that they wound up booking our event, which means they can’t get enough. It means we either need to get you on a vitamin regimen before the event or buy some fake pun. I need you to come on her face. I don’t see why we can’t invent a surgery to put fake cum in your balls. We just put a little bag in there and it’s like you get the vasectomy and then they just replace it and then you squeeze it when you want to squeeze it, yeah, because you’re already usually jerking it. Yeah, I could fake that easy. And then you could just like, well, you wouldn’t even notice you sleight of hand almost like a magician. David Copperfield with cum, which from what I hear, he did a lot on his island, on his island. Maybe he did invent it. Maybe that invention sits on his island somewhere. You don’t know. You’d only have to go there to find out. That was that. Um, we will be there again this month. If you’re there with us again this month, and you want to meet me at the hot tub, do Trimax together. It’s the new thing. Everybody’s doing it. Just don’t block his cubbyhole. fuck on checkbook. I’ve wanted to review my blowjob machine that has been in transit for quite some time. I can’t wait for it to get here. All I do is think about lying in my bed and getting blowjobed by a machine. All I think about, it’s the auto blow AI Ultra. This is a serious machine. It’s a serious contraption. It’s not taboo toy’s fault that it’s not here. It’s just that we have to get everything muled in here because it’s a pain in the ass to get stuff shipped here. Oh yeah, it’ll stay in customs forever. Yeah, but this thing is supposed to be amazing. I just hate making. You, you give me blowjobs 3 times a day, which is normal. I’m fantastic at, you’re fantastic at it. I’m trying to bring your workload down. Yeah, it’s a lot. I’m like, I’m trying to do QuickBooks. I’m waiting for this thing to arrive, right, because I’m a professional and I have to review it. Um, so my friend has it. I don’t know when, when it’s arriving. I don’t know if he’s using it. He says that he’s not using it. I don’t know what I’m getting it. You know what we should do is call him and see. I bet he’s using it. I don’t know. I’m gonna ask. I hope so. hello. Uh, hi, hi, can you, can you hear us? I, I can hear you. Are you at work? I’m, I’m at work, but I’m not in an office. OK, so you can speak freely. Uh, Lauren is on the line and you are being recorded. Hi. Uh, uh, hi, Lauren. I’m not, I’m not allowing this. No, you are. No, you are. It’s, it’s a simple, it’s gonna be very, very quick. Do you have my blowjob machine? Yes, OK. Out of curiosity, have you used my blowjob machine? Be honest. Wait, I’ll start off slowly. Do you know, do you know if your giant penis can fit inside of the blowjob machine that’s arriving? Have you discovered that yet? Have you at least tested that part? Why are you asking? I’m just, where does this come from? Why are you asking? I’m just curious because, well, I did have something that was transported here and that person did use the device who also, like you had a large member. Afterwards it wasn’t working correctly. So I’m just curious. You can use it. I want you to, but, I wanna know, are you being careful? Are you being safe? And, and 2, how is it like, do you shave before groom? I, I, I am always groomed, always ready, always, always sex ready, down with the machine and a glass of wine, obviously. And, and since you said it like that, uh, yes, I did use it. You did, uh, yeah. Was it, was it, was it pretty good? It was very good. Fantastic. I was surprised, really. It was surprised. I was surprised. So, um, you promise not to break it before it gets here. I promise. Is it gonna be, is the machine itself gonna be too large for me? Let me ask you something. When you put your penis in it, is it like the Hulk’s in a telephone booth? I, I’ve never been. But that’s a good one. No, did you do it alone or did you do it with someone? I, I did. That’s why I used it. I happened to be alone for a part of the night and so I took it out. There’s no shame in this, my friend. We’re supposed to be doing no shame. No. Did you get it? No, I was worried you would be mad. I’m not, I’m not mad. You have my blessing. Just don’t break it. It’s just, you get to transport it and, and you’re on the podcast talking about how, how good the blowjob machine is from Taboo Toys. So, and then I’ll give it a second review and just don’t fucking break it. I won’t break it, I promise. Please don’t break it. It was great though. Do you put lube in it or something? I did just to give it, you know, even more of a realistic feeling. Thank you for taking care of it. I can’t wait to see it. I appreciate you being our sex toy mule. I can we not ask the question that everyone’s wanting to know? I don’t know what everyone wants to know. What is it? How long did it take you to come with the blowjob machine? Is that what everyone wanted to know? Yes. How can you not want to know that? Oh, how long did it take? Um, it was like it was less than 10 minutes. OK, that’s good. I like that. OK, mark that down. Did you come in the machine? Of course he came in the machine. I mean, I knew I was gonna clean it anyways, so yes, of course he did. Listen, is it possible that in 9 months there’ll be like 3 or 4 machines, 3 or 4 little guys, yeah. All right, well, listen, clean that thing out. I will, I promise if it has a funky smell, my friend. I mean, no, thank you again. Get back to work. Sorry for interrupting you. I, I feel like you’re not interrupting. Thanks. Love you guys. Appreciate it. Love you. Bye bye. I really didn’t know if he used it. No, I really didn’t. That’s so funny. Auto blow AI ultra. What does the AI do? The AI you can link up online and you can sync it like to porn and stuff, and it’ll like give you shut up. Yeah, I know it’s fucking worth every penny, this thing. It’s not a joke. It’s not a joke. And then you, it has like different mouths slash sleeves that you can swap out if you want different. Does it have a Mitch McConnell mouth? I don’t think they have that in uh he should though if he’s missing out on some good licensing. He’s not. Does it have a David Copperfield mouth? I think it’s just a unisex mouth. I don’t know if it’s man or woman. I think it’s just a mouth. It’s equal opportunity here. Does it have a Timothy Chalamet mouth? People want to know if you enjoyed this episode, make sure to go leave a positive review or for more information, go to room 77life.com. Thanks for stopping by room 77. We had a blast. Now get your clothes and get out. I teach my brain.