Ep. 19: A Pile of Girls on Girls on Girls...and Your Mom

This podcast contains explicit content, language, and sexual situations. It is intended for adults 18 years of age and older. These thoughts and opinions expressed are not those of any specific employer, group, or individual. Fed up with the rat race, we decided to sell everything and move to Cancun, Mexico.

Now. We do what we love. Work, party, and play at the Desire resorts. After 16 years in the lifestyle, we thought we saw it all.

We were so wrong. So wrong. Oh my God, so wrong. Now we want to share the fun that we get to have every day.

So come to room 77. Let's play. All right, and. We are back.

We're present. I don't know where we're back from. Can I do this with gum in my mouth? No, you cannot.

You're not as talented as I am. How do you do it with gum in your mouth every time? I'm a pro. I need this Nicorette because I ran out of cigarettes today.

That doesn't, doesn't seem to make any sense. All right, I'll put it away. Put it on the shelf. I did that last time and then I forgot it and then it turns into a marble.

Well, at least it's better than like some sort of goo. Now I have to move it back under the tongue. Your gum was sticking on the front of your teeth like you were mocking me that I can't have Nicorette and you can. I can move it all around, baby.

This is what I do want to do. I want to apologize to our listener because I know we're taking a long time and I apologize for that. I do. I, I just, we've been getting so busy with other crap.

We're trying. That's no excuse, Richard. That is no excuse. That's what my mom would say.

Speaking of your mom, I wanna get to that, that a little bit later. Today I thought was an amazing day. I, I was super horny, but I didn't know I was horny, and I know that doesn't make any sense. So I'm gonna back up of my week before, right?

There's sort of a lot of stuff that happened up at RM meeting couples like we met this sort of super fanny couple. I thought you're gonna say superheroes because they look like superheroes. They did. They had the bodies of gods, which is always a, it's not necessity when you are approached with that.

You are like, hello. Hey, I always find it intimidating. But anyway, you met them first, right, because I was still in the gym. Yeah, so I, I was just putting my stuff down and coming up running behind me, Lauren, and I turned around and there they are, and I'm like, holy shit, I am a.

Love with him at first sight, like, and she's, I mean, I don't want to go on and on about bodies, don't, but I was looking at her and I just wanted to take my tongue and just lick her all over like an ice cream cone, like an ice cream, sure, yeah. So then you tell me, hey, our listeners are here, basically, our listeners, and I come down to the pool first. I talked to the wrong couple and they don't even know what a podcast is. I'm like, this is super confusing.

How is this possible? And then you introduced them, and I was like, Oh, fuck you people. I don't know who you are, but never mind. Try to forget everything that we just said.

I don't wanna be friends with you anymore. Hi, you guys. They were really sweet, so they know from listening to us that we can't stay out on school nights. So we just sort of hung out with them, but we did promise them we'll come up on Thursday and we will, we'll hang a little bit.

We'll have. Dinner up there and do it. We were very, very careful not to step on their, I don't know, virgin toes. Yeah, they weren't complete virgins, but they were swirly vanilla swirl-ish.

They were just sort of getting started. We figured, honestly, let's just have a good time. They're really sweet people, so we did the workshopy thing, then we go back there on Thursday, right, and we hang out with them, and we're still trying to figure out. Even if they're in the lifestyle, and I was like, I'm just gonna ask them.

So I asked them, Are you in the lifestyle? And surprised they were. We had thought that they weren't, they weren't, yeah, but I know she wanted to have your baby. I did.

I said I was just flirting really hard, and then I felt stupid because I was like, I don't know if they're in the lifestyle. But yeah, I was like, You want to have my baby. Well, you say flirting hard, but you, you still suck at this. I mean.

You're doing a women's on women's class. Women's on women. I said it again. I don't know what's wrong with that.

I can't talk. You're doing a girl on girl class, but when it comes to flirting with women, it's just like, I really suck at it. You really suck. Later on in the night we're talking to them.

Everyone thinks that we have sex with 1000 couples per week. That's what they think when they get up there. They're sort of, they realize, oh, that's impossible. And you know, they were a victim of that too, because you hear the podcast, you hear stories of us playing, you, you sort of, I guess, no fault of their own, imagine, well, that's probably what happens on a daily basis, but it's not really what happens on a daily basis.

Each one of you are very special. I don't wanna take anything away from anybody else. I'm talking to you. You know.

You know who you are. You are very special to us. So, um, but you know, the thing is, when people are new in the lifestyle, they don't wanna reveal we're in the lifestyle, but we've only played twice. I mean, can you imagine that in another world situation they are potentially embarrassed to say we've only slept around.

Strangers twice and we're really kind of embarrassed to tell you that. I mean, it's just opposite everything in the world, right? On the other side of the vanilla world, you'd be like, I am with my husband and I am proud to say that I've never laid down with another human being. And in this world, sometimes they're like, I am a little embarrassed to say that, um, we've only had sex with two couples this year.

It just doesn't make any sense. It doesn't. It's so strange and you find yourself going, that's OK. That's OK.

Just keep working. You'll get there. You guys got this. You're young.

You're sexy. You're gonna have sex with thousands of people. The point is, nothing happened, and then I come home to my beautiful. That's what I was about to say.

I'm like, and, and I go upstairs. I say something romantic like, How about a blowjob. What my wife says to me is, um, I'm really tired. Is it possible that I could just lie here and you just fuck my mouth?

I did a lot of talking. My jaw was tired. That's what I meant. So yeah, so that's it.

So that brings us to, it was just an amazing week. So much happened. I, I should start taking notes, but today we had a group of people wanted a private workshop in disco. So we worked with the hotel and we made this amazing workshop sort of happen.

It was really. Amazing. I mean, it really was. I went in there and I was like, I am going to, because they paid for it, obviously.

I am going to make this really worth their while. Well, I brought extra toys, but it was a really great group. I lay down with the first person, start rubbing her, and, uh, we almost made love. That's how, that's how it started.

That's how it started. one bed one. I was like, I don't even know where to go from here. I think they all had a really great time, but immediately after that, other people hired us, said, look, we're doing the sexy photoshoot.

They emailed us and they said, we're coming up again. Would you guys be interested in being in the sexy photoshoot with us? We've met them at the hotel, but we've known them for a while. We've seen them several times.

We'll have you sort of. Involved, but will keep you face free or it will keep you shadowed or whatever. Yeah, basically whatever you want. If you want, it doesn't mean that we want to have sex with you.

It doesn't mean that you have to do anything that you're uncomfortable with. Your faces can be in it. We could just use your torsos. We just want something different.

We already did it before. We want something different that involves more erotic, and we're like, let me think about it. Let's Do it. Sounds fun.

Sounds fun. We go into that now. I'm already horny from not only last week, but now I'm horny from the workshop that we just did, and they were back to back. We're like running from one to the other.

They're in there and they're, we're like, Oh, let's just do whatever, whatever. Let's just, just ask us. We'll let you know if it's OK. All right, I digress.

Last night you had a phone call with your mom. Yeah, both actually, but yeah, both moms, parents. You were birthed by two moms. You didn't actually really come out to them or tell them anything super crazy, but there were some questions that you had to sort of answer for your mom because you guys are really close, and it's hard when you're hiding 99% of your life from someone for 2 years.

You're like, what are you? Doing down there, yeah, because at least in our previous life we had our sexual swinger life, but we had a life and it was like we had dogs, we had this, we had all these things that we could talk about, and here our lifestyles mixed with where we work and then our extracurricular activities are also lifestyle related because we're spending so much time making this podcast. I literally just got to a point where I'm like, I feel like I have to tell them something. So I did some texting.

Friday night or a couple nights ago I did and then I didn't have time to do it the next day to call them. Well, you pushed for a while. I pushed and this time they're spinning, right? They're spinning.

Why are they spinning? Because my texts were a little vague, as I do, and, uh, she said something like, Are you a prostitute? And I was like, I'm not. No, not a prostitute, not a prostitute.

Told them I was like, we have a podcast. They were like, Oh my God, do you do it naked. And I'm like, well, and I'm thinking because I'm on the phone, I'm like, um, well, no, I mean, sometimes I wear a bathing suit, but you know, podcast is a radio show, and they're like, Oh, we thought you were like making soft porn. So then you soft porn, mom, that's crap.

No one watches that. So, um, they're like, how are you making money down there? And I'm just like, oh my God. Speaking of, of making money, uh, really quick, I'm gonna take this moment right now to say thank you to the Patreons because I don't know where they're coming from.

They're coming out of the woodwork, and right now I am videotaping a piece that I will send to the Patreons of us recording this so they will see us recording this before they actually even hear it. So this is coming up for you. Say hi, Lauren. But we wanna thank them.

But that's one way you could tell, you could tell your mom, hey, they're strangers that send us money, and we love it. That's a good way to think about that. Go on. So what is her major concerns?

Basically, this is what I'm getting. Her major concern is you're doing a radio show in the nude. One second is I'm doing something like some sort of Kardashian. She's kind of like a billionaire, not the worst thing in the world, right?

And also getting a law degree. She is. And then the third thing I guess was, I don't know what frayed for us to listen to on the podcast, I guess. I don't know.

I couldn't really, so basically thought we were doing porn. Let me go back to the photo shoot today. So this conversation happens last night. And now literally less than 24 hours later, I am in a room with two other naked people doing sexual acts while someone else puts it on film.

You were going down on the other girl. They were shooting you in these very, very sexy positions. I'm having so much fun. I mean, you guys looked amazing.

I mean, it looked amazing. So then they move on to, all right, now we all get, now it's. Group sex photo time. Another question my dad asked, by the way, right?

Do you have group sex? If above 8 is group sex? No, we do not have group sex. No one can navigate plastic sixome, Dad, it's very difficult.

We start getting mixed up now and click, click, click, click, click, click. The photos are going, the photos are going, yeah, we were doing all kinds of touchy, fakey stuff, and then, well, you can't fake it, right? You can't fake that. You guys get to fake it, but I don't want to be on camera.

Without, right, no, so there was a moment where this is gonna sound really weird. At the end, the photographer says, is there anything else that you didn't get before I leave? And he looks at me and he's like, I mean a cum shot if it's possible. And I'm like, I'll come all over the place if you want.

I've been since last week. Get me some lube. You did. That was the first words out of my mouth.

Challenge accepted. So I climb onto the bed. I start masturbating like it's saving my life, and she wants it on her boobs because she doesn't want to mess up her makeup, which was perfect, by the way. She looked amazing.

I come all over her tits, and it was big too because I had been holding back for a little while for the big shoot. That's how we do it. That's how we do it, you know what I mean? That's how you're paid.

That's how us professionals do it. We, we weigh it up a little bit, so we have a lot of ejaculate. Oh no, you did it. I come, but what I'm not prepared for, and this has never happened in my life, what happened?

You come and there's 100 flashes, click, click click, click click click, click, click click, click click, click click, click, click. I'm at the Emmys, but my cock's out and I'm coming all over. And at that very moment, I thought of your mom. I'm like, oh my gosh.

Not that I thought of your mom, but, but I did. What room are you guys in? 10:18. 10:18.

I am here at 10:18, a frightened new couple that we met on a balmy Thursday afternoon. How long have you been in the lifestyle? Like 9 months. That's about right.

About 9 months. How did you both discover that you wanted to be in the lifestyle? Was it you, you. Dirty is all AF or was it you?

I would say I discovered it and then posed the question. So he posed the question to you. What did the question sound like? Well, we had been to Temptation several times before, met a lot of friends that were in the lifestyle, but it still wasn't a thing that I thought we would be interested in.

Did your friends ever say, hey, can we fuck you? Not in those words. Did they say, hey, let's all go take a bath. Actually, shower.

Let's go shower together. Totally innocent showers, dress up that turned into undress up. At first, were you like, ew, my friends are so gross, but I'm kind of horny. No, not gross at all.

I just didn't think I wanted to share him when you decided, all right. I want to do this. How did you bring it up? It was in the hot tub at our house and I had been listening to some lifestyle podcasts.

We'd seen a bad example of a lifestyle couple. I was so nervous to ask her about it because I didn't want to mirror what had gone bad with them. I didn't want you to bring Lauren and me up during this, but now that it's out there. We, we apologize.

Do you remember how you posed it to her? I don't. Do you remember your reaction? Were you, oh, tell me that.

I was jealous and didn't think I was good enough. So we talked for 34 months, really got open and real with each other, and so kind of magical, and I got to. Finally say that I was interested in women, and that was something I was really scared of telling him and we've been married for 9 years and that's just crazy to actually come out and say it and he accepted. And what made you afraid of admitting to him that you were attracted to women, you bisexual slut, you whore.

I don't know because it's just taboo. It's not the normal. When you said that to him, had you ever experienced being with a woman before? Yes, just kissing and maybe touching, but it wasn't with him.

How long had it been from that time of your experience to the years that you were with him, married, that you had ever touched another woman? 15 years. 15 years. That's too long.

It's way too long. So, here's my question. It's only been 9 months. Have you been with a woman since you guys broke into this dirty world?

Yes, you have. Was it everything you remembered it to be? Yes, and better and more. Yes, I actually gave my first orgasm to a woman last night, and so I was super proud of myself.

I'm proud of you too. I've never done that to any woman. It was my first time. I feel so, yeah, exactly.

That's amazing. Were you nervous going into being with a woman because some one of the things that we're talking about in this particular episode is how women sometimes have these wants and these needs, but life, because of how life is or your relationship like we just talked about, doesn't allow you any practice. It doesn't allow you any, oh, that was wrong, or oh I like that, I didn't like that. You just sort of, you may have one or two experiences your entire.

Your life. So when you find yourself faced with a vagina, you're like, I know mine, but I don't really know what to do. Was there any of that going on? Oh yeah, absolutely.

But I feel like communication is huge, right? I've been way more open with him about what I like personally in, in our sex life, and so I just kind of bring that with our experiences in the lifestyle, and I feel like I'm really vocal. OK, so the woman that she gave an orgasm to last night, did you also give her an orgasm? I did not.

OK, so. All right, moving on, moving on to the next question. girl on girl play. Here's my next question.

Then my last question. Now that you're totally in the lifestyle, what happened to those friends who were trying to get you into the shower? And we haven't played with any of them. They're still around.

They ask for sexy pictures every now and then, but were they like, we're like, what the fuck, man? We tried to do this. Now what? Thank you guys so much.

We really appreciate it. It was a pleasure meeting you and hopefully we will see you again. 100% for sure. All right, see you again.

And we started. I can't sit Indian style. I can't sit with my legs open. You can sit with your legs open, seeing you do it.

I knew you were gonna say that. Uh, yeah, we have the most uncomfortable furniture ever made. It's like if you just took 2x4s and covered it in paper towel, and that's what you used as cushions. It just sucks.

All right, so this is where I wanna start. I feel very like I'm not getting a lot of love at all. You get a lot of love from. A lot of the ladies, do you want the love from the ladies or from the men?

I'll take the love from anyone, to be honest, but no, I never get mad on man love. That never happens except for that old friend of mine. We were best friends, tan man, but he never came back. Yeah, I just, it's amazing to me how the women are on top of you, not physically on top of you, but the women really enjoy having you on their face, theoretically.

on their face, I guess, but it's something that men don't have. Like women show up at that resort and they're like, I'm going to do my special bond with my women on there. Go, go women power. There's such a bond between like women and women.

It's still something that I obviously as a man, I can't connect to that. Joe, do you want to tell me what it's like being with a a woman? When women are with women, yeah, there you go, when women are with women, yeah, when women are with other women, or when women are together, right, there's like this weird thing that happens. It's like two magnets that sort of are coming together, but once they get just close enough, they click, they click together.

Like it's that thing. It's actually something that makes me feel sometimes insecure because you feel like, oh, they have that magic ability like wonder twin powers activate. And I'm left out of that, you know what I mean. So is that the way it feels to you?

Is that the way? Is there a sense of something that, that we're all missing as men? I think your spidey sense is correct. However, when I think back to the very first time I ever had a woman say, Do you want to kiss a woman.

And I was like, yeah, how old were you? I was 21. Go on. So a bunch of models, of course.

I know, I know. All right, so you're this young, wide-eyed 21 year old model with other models. Yeah, we were all in Asia and you're stuck in Asia and you have nothing to do except touch each other. Oh my God.

So we were in the hotel. Go on. Don't mind me masturbating. It was literally the middle of the day.

It was so random. And, and she was like, so my roommate is a lesbian, and she said, Do you want to kiss a girl? And so I was like, Yeah. She goes, And do you want me to do it to you?

And I'm like, Yeah, I do. It is that weird thing of the magnets, right? But you know when you put two magnets together and sometimes it's like there's that little like, uh, well, that's when the poles are the same, so positive, positive, yeah, so it's like that, uh, when they're resisting one another for just a second and then it's like boom, they snap. No, that's not how magnets work.

They flip over, yeah, they flip over, yeah, they flip. I mean, I can feel it to this day. Where is she? Um, she was Australian Australia.

Oh, maybe able to find her. So you two are going down on each other. How far did it go? Did you touch each other in your private spots?

She was 18, right? I don't know actually how old she was. She was 18. Were you both naked in a loft somewhere in Taipei?

Oh my God, you're in Asia. You're naked in the daytime somewhere. Are you guys living alone? She wasn't my roommate.

Well, what were you doing in a room together? I think we were working on a job. Together and um she just invited me over to her hotel which was crappy and she had to get some stuff or whatever and yes she did she had she got it she get some my two models are modeling in Asia and she's like, hey Lauren, would you come over to my hotel? I just, I forgot some stuff and I need to see you in my room.

And then you get up there and, and then we sit on the bed because there's like nothing really in the room except beds. You know, and you're like her roommate was working at some other shoot, and she was, so she's just telling me about the story, and she goes, it was so amazing. Do you want to feel what it feels like? And I'm like, yeah, I do, because I'm 21 and I'm exploring everything.

Meanwhile, I had a boyfriend back home, but I don't think he would have cared. Oh well, it's cheating. Yeah, it was. I mean, it's cheating.

If you don't have consent, it doesn't matter because Man, woman, it doesn't matter. No, I totally, I totally cheated on him. I hate the female card. No, you're totally right.

If it's female, female, it's not cheating. No, it's cheating. If you don't get consent, it's cheating. Don't pull that shit.

It's not fair. I cheated on him. I just wanted to see what it felt like. All right, so how far does it go?

That's it. We just kissed. That's it. Is that really cheating?

Yes. Are you still worried about that? Yeah, I am now. Yes, it's cheating, but I'm a little sad that your clothes didn't come off.

I'm also, hold on, I'm a little sad at a couple of things. Give you some time to alter your fucking story. I'm a little sad your clothes never came off. I'm a little sad the lesbian never walked in and went, What are you two doing?

Oh my God, that would have been awesome. And I'm also a little bit sad that there wasn't some other random chick or housekeeper that walked in and got involved. I'm gonna ask you again, did any of that stuff happen? Not during that day.

So you. Wound up getting naked with her I'm guessing again at some point. Yes, we end up, we were like inseparable. You're magnets, yeah, I felt like just get to the sex, OK, so we end up in a threesome with who?

Some guy. What guy in Asia? Yeah, some other an Asian guy or a model guy. Another model.

I've never heard this fucking story before. What the fuck is this? My first threesome. It was just a bunch of kissing and rolling around, stupid.

That's why it's called my Fisher Price first threesome. So the dude never took his pants. Looking back at it, it's again, it sort of goes back to what we were talking about with that couple where we didn't take their clothes off and we were just kissing. It's kind of like that.

Like that's what was so overwhelmingly erotic about it is because there was touching and kissing and everyone was just rolling around and kissing each other. It was so stupid but so sexy. Do you remember who the guy was? No idea.

I didn't even know who he was. It was someone else because there were like a bunch of agencies and we. All lit. No one cares.

Yeah, I don't know. And then it was like we all ended up playing pool, pool, yeah. And then we played pool till like 6 o'clock in the morning because I had to leave. And then I got on the plane drunk, and that's when I brought my powdered milk home, and I ended up going through customs.

I thought it all happened. So you left the threesome out of the powdered milk story. 3, it was all connected 22 years ago. Yeah, it's funny to think about because at 21, well, you're.

Real world at that point. That's what I picture in my head. It's like Real World on MTV. It's all that shit and those shenanigans that happen and you look at it and you're like, Oh, those kids, they're just kids being kids rolling around kissing.

They're in threesomes, and, but I feel like my 21, I was very young. You were 21 is pretty young. Our first threesome together was with a 21-year-old. Pretty sure she was younger than that, but oh yeah, she was, well, she was 19 when I, when I was start messing around with her.

I look at that and I was like, well, she. It was so much more advanced. I was 27, so I feel like my 21 was in her defense, she had already lived a life of being addicted to heroin and came off. She had lived a life that both of us combined couldn't even imagine.

She, she's a little more street. So now moving up to now, I mean, you still get nervous being with a woman, right? Absolutely, because there's that one on one thing. I need my wingman.

There's. Years and years and years that you learn that you grow up through your teens and everything else that you, you're a boy girl and you go through a whole process, right, and then you get into this lifestyle or you join the lifestyle with your husband it could be 3 years or 3 months or whatever and you're like, yeah, bisexuality is one of the things that I've always really liked and enjoyed, but the problem is I've only done it like 3 times in my entire life, not a lot of practice. So when you get into these situations, it's very normal for a Girl to feel like I do love it. I really do enjoy it.

I don't know what I'm doing. It wasn't until, like, I don't know, maybe 4 years ago that I had some girl, uh, show me how to touch her inside, and she took me through this. She's like, OK, now, um, just put your finger here and you're gonna feel this little ridge, and then you're just pressing there. Oh yeah, press there.

And I was like, Oh shit, I'm doing stuff. My point is, is, is you could be super bi. Or buy or buy comfortable or even a lesbian I guess and still feel uncomfortable taking that step because you haven't had a lot of practice. That was one of the things that we had always talked about as far as you maybe developing something to do to have a, I don't know, it's not even a workshop about it, just as a place to facilitate an environment where women could come in and just get.

Comfortable with that feeling of being around other women in a vulnerable sense, you know what I mean? I mean, I know what you mean, but I don't really know what you mean. I mean, I mean it. I know you know.

Look, we're gonna talk about this in the next segment about your, your workshopy thing that addresses all of these problems of the world of girl on girl. They're not problems, they're awesomeness. Yeah, I mean, not problems, problems, you know, uh, still uncomfortable. Jesus.

Anyway, we'll come back with it. What room am I in right now? 2114. I am with a gentleman that is built like a brick shithouse, or is it a shit brick house?

He's built like a tank. Uh, I wanted to ask you guys, how long have you been together? Over 20 years now. How long have you been in the lifestyle?

3 years. 3 years ago. You're. Thinking what I'm not thinking anything.

You're not thinking anything, really. You're just going on with your life. Everything's normal business, right? Hold on one second, my dear Karen.

What is going through your mind three years ago? Well, I was surfing the internet and I, I learned some stuff. I was afraid you were gonna, I was afraid you're gonna be vague. Did you do a search or did you see something that piqued your interest?

Uh, I search up a lot of sexy stuff, whatever, like porn, like I do at night when I'm alone. Yeah, but just informational things too. OK, so maybe something that was like threesome, foursome, probably, probably like non-monogamy stuff. So then you see this thing and you get a little turned on, I'm guessing.

Well, yeah, I, I guess I just really felt enlightened with swinging. I thought it was more like In the 70s kind of image was in my head. We're all hairy and we listen to Bee Gee and we put our keys in a bowl. Who has the red Fierro?

I am having sex with you. And you hope you get the guy with the Jovan Musk, the Corvette and the, you know, the suave pants, the white pants and the gold medallion. If you're lucky, if you're lucky, if you're lucky, that's yes. So now that happens and the next.

You, Jeff, don't know that she did this search. You're minding my own business. Nothing to see here. No, just going about your day.

She's using the internet for what it was invented for, right? Yes, discreetly. Mode, are you in incognito mode? No, I don't bother with the incognito.

Do you check history? No, not at all. Here's the dilemma. You decide at some point this is something I think I want to try.

It sounded pretty interesting. It was a lot different than what I thought, but Jeff here has. No fucking clue. Well, that's why I'm here to tell him, right?

So you have to let him know. Yes. How do you do that? How do you find out?

So Karen's on the internet, pretty sure she's probably on the dark web somewhere now. She has to tell you. How do you find out? Yeah, that, that is a fantastic question.

So she says we have to have a tub tonight. To our listener, what is a tub? So a tub would be a romantic night in the, in the tub, right? We would have a chance to talk.

Are you both in the tub? Yeah, just me, me and my wife drinking wine, candles, nice weekend, like, you know, like a Friday night type of thing. We're going to have a tub tonight. Tonight we're gonna have a tub.

Yeah, I didn't know anything that was, so minding my own business, got in the tub and was relaxed, probably enjoying the wine. She was getting ready to come in and she's like, we need to talk, Stern. We need to talk. I did an internet search and I was like, we must be having like the.

Divorce talk. Like this is, this is it. This is the end of our marriage. Yeah, this is what it is.

Not a, not a glimpse of any problem in 17 years, perfect relationship, great communication, my best friend, the whole bit, but it's like that night in particular we're we're separating, which makes no sense. She goes, uh, I sent you a book. She sent you a book. She says, I sent you a Kindle.

She sent you an electronic book, an electronic book, and she's like, and you need to read it. And you hadn't seen it yet. I hadn't seen it. I don't even know what I'm reading.

yet. Did she tell you or did you get out of the tub and look? Not, not just we're going to get there. It's not just she goes, yeah, it's a book about swinging.

It's the swinging Handbook, and we're going to do that. I don't know how long she worked in that speech, but I mean that was phenomenal because it was blunt, blunt, straight to the point. No, I love you or anything like that. Just boom, boom, boom, get it done.

What happens after that? Does she just walk out of the room, or does she go, All right, now mount me? No. The mountain, not just yet.

So she was just kind of looked with the quizzical face and then I think climbed in because I was, I didn't even know. I, I'm still thinking swinging 70s, keys, bowls, the whole bit. I have nothing to relate it to. And so she sat in the tub and then she's like, right, and we got a, we got an order of things that need to happen here.

So we're going to create a profile. So we better come up with a name fast. Hold on. So you're just, you're just following the book to the left.

Yeah, so we got to create a profile. We got to get some pictures. Did you wind up having your first experience from a website? Yes.

So you, you put yourself out there and you meet your first couple. Was the first time that you did it, was it nerve-wracking? Was it scary? Was it fun?

How was the experience for you? I think it was like highs and lows, so it was scary, like sort of more of a what's going to happen? Like it's like what's going to happen once we get through these because you had never really done anything. That before, right?

Exactly. Do they show up at your place? We went to their place. No.

Was it a threesome, foursome? What was it? Another couple. It was another couple.

Yes. Did you go all the way? No, soft swap. What was your favorite part of your first time with that couple, making an orgasm.

What was your favorite part? You had a really nice cock. Your man here, I've seen it cause you took the workshop. He has a beautiful cock.

How much more beautiful could it have been? Um, yes, it does have a beautiful cock, but this one was very nice. This is what is awesome with the lifestyle is you think you communicated before, you think you had good communication, you know, she's my best friend, I talk to her all the time, and we think we're communicating. You get in the lifestyle and you learn to communicate.

That is probably one of the gifts that's maybe spoken about or not spoken about, but you become a much better communicator. You become a much more aware person and a much more committed to understanding needs and wants, but also just communicating. Like that. I don't like that.

It works great for us because she was already my best friend, but now I'm with my best friend, my wingman, my wing person. You're out on the town with your best friend. Yeah. And it's just an amazing sort of experience in life.

Yeah. It it's not talked about like it, it's, I think the challenges for the, for the lifestyle is the nobody really understands it. Like, I don't want to be the mayor of Swing town, and I do. I want to be the mayor of Swing town.

In fact, I may call myself the mayor of Swing town. I would vote for you. See, thank you guys so much. Um, I appreciate it.

It was great meeting you and uh we hope to see you again. All right, so here we are. We started again. We're gonna talk about your workshopy thing, but I want to point out this week we got to hang out with our naughty escapades with Bob and Nikki.

I think they're Bob and Nikki now. They were Ben and Jen, but now they're not on the run from the law anymore. The statute of limitations has, has run out, and they can use their real name. Anyway, that's what I was told.

Maybe they were drunk, but we had a lot of fun with them too. Amazing spirits that really are the entire spirit, the entire vibe of desire. If you could bottle it up, it is those two. You just come to the resort, you are minute to minute, you're sexual, you're fun, you're conversational.

They are everything that is what is right with the world and desire, really, and they really helped you out, which we'll talk about later. Everything's happening later. Um, this is what I wanted to talk about. I wanted to talk about your girls on Girls, girls camp workshop that you had.

So you had this idea where you wanted women to experience women on women, women who've never been with women before, women who are really curious about feeling women, have a safe place where they can touch, maybe just stroke, maybe a little kiss here and there, where it was just women. For women, by women, tell me about what this cult was. This workshop was something that we had discussed for like at least a year, right? We were gonna do it with Millie way back when, my girlfriend, my girlfriend Millie, but go on.

So Millie texted, right, a few times. I think she misses me. All right, go back to the story. Well, she did say to, when are we gonna see each other?

I will text her, let her know that it will be tomorrow. So we were gonna do this workshop, girl on girl and we could never figure out what we were supposed to do with the husbands during this workshop so that we could steal the women and give them a safe place to experience what I've heard a lot of women after our art of touch say I've never been touched by a woman and it was really different. It was so soft. It was really exhilarating.

Well, I want everyone to feel that because we are softer than you are. I'm pretty smooth. So in walks, I wish I could say her name because I want everybody to know her and her husband, just a force when they come to desire, their positive energy just sort of radiates throughout the resort. They're just really, really sweet people.

She comes in, helped you with it. She put it up with you. If it wasn't for her saying, let's do this and Putting it on the schedule, I would have just kept procrastinating because I'm frozen by fear a lot. She gave me like this comfort, like a little nudge of encouragement.

Her and her husband have come to our workshop so many times that I feel really comfortable. I feel really close to her. So I'm like, OK, let's do this workshop together. The thing that I want to point out on a very serious note about her is fantastic tits.

That's not serious. I mean they are just magnificent. I, I, I adore touching her. I also adore her husband.

I don't want to leave him out of this anyway. I say, hey, you're gonna do next Friday because I'm gonna stay home and take a nap. This was the plan. This was the original plan.

Richard stays home and takes a nap. You girls go do the work. So you guys decide, all right, I'm gonna put this thing together. So Friday comes.

Friday comes. She had been marketing to the ladies to rally people, so that was genius, right? So it's like she's running for girl on girl office and she's running around the resort telling everybody, Hey, you want some girl on girl action, you come and visit mama today. Lauren's coming in and we're doing this special thing and you need to be there and if you're not there, you're gonna go to the jacuzzi and everyone's gonna talk about it.

You're gonna feel like you missed out, right? You're gonna be shunned not only by people in desire but by society, quite honestly, yeah, and that's, I think that's what happened. So she did a really good job of people who had never touched a girl and weren't even really curious about it to even encourage them to come and just say just. Come and experience it.

It's gonna be really special. We invite, I think we had probably about 20 women in there. You did lights and smoke. No, I did way more than that because my wife plans this whole thing out and then 20 minutes, maybe an hour, starting an hour before just goes into shutdown.

I can't do this. I'm not doing this. I told you I get frozen. So then I start to panic now.

I want to remind our listener, I was supposed to have the day off. I should, at this point, I should be at home in my bed, taking a nap, like a nice quiet nap. So I'm setting up the room, so I'm trying to help our friend, I'm trying to help you. I was so stressed.

It was more difficult than anything that I've ever done as far as workshopy things, because of how panicked you look. So at the start of the workshop, you're supposed to go in, give them a talkie talk on what's supposed to happen. And you're white as a sheet, and I say to you, do you want me to talk to them? And you go, yes.

All right, let's see how this goes because I haven't practiced anything. I don't even know what's on your sheet except I read it like 2 or 3 times, but I've, I've, I have no idea. I'm not even supposed to be there. This is supposed to be, and I have to tell them, hey, uh, hi, I'm Richard.

Welcome. Welcome to Lauren's class. Nothing like having all us girls here, huh? But I told her I was like, Lauren's a little nervous.

Nervous. So I'm gonna take the talky part for a little while and just get her going. Uh, I think they were listening to me though. You did a really good job.

No, I was amazing, but I was trying to force it onto you like, and Lauren, but you would just look at me like you're doing really good, Richard. Keep going. That sounds great. I didn't even even think of saying that.

So we tell them, look, basically, here you are. You are in a Safe place. All your vaginas can hang out, do whatever with your boobs. Um, if you've ever wanted to touch a girl, kiss a girl, just really wanna get you in the mindset for it.

So the husbands are outside. All the women are in there, and they're saying things like this. This was your fucking plan, wasn't it? This is a brilliant fucking plan.

So you can be in there and watch. You just wanna work. Well, I'm not gonna watch. I'm just, I'm gonna be out here with you guys.

Every time I would come in and check on you or add some lights or music or whatever I had to do. I would come out and they would all sort of turn to the door and go, what's going on? What are they doing? And I was like going on in there.

I'm like, well, all right now they're all in a circle and, uh, they're facing one another and I think they're touching each other's titties. I think I glanced. I was sort of hiding one eye. I didn't really want to interrupt.

All I remember is it escalating like this, and then you can sort of fill in the blanks. I go in, it's a bunch of women in a circle. Then I go in and it's a bunch of naked women in a circle. Two circles.

Then I go in again and all the women are naked in two circles touching each other and then I go in again and it's kind of turning into an orgy of like 20 women and then at the very end it's, it looks like a just a pile, just a pile of naked women. Like if you had to haul women on a flatbed on a flatbed and you're like just throw them on that mattress, that's what it looked like just the amount because I was in the middle of it. So it got really sensual and the whole atmosphere of it being really safe and everyone taking it really slowly, it was very, very sexy. Yeah, it seemed sexy and by the time I made it back in, um, there's a lot of like moaning and I don't know, just stuff happening and I was like, oh, they're really having a good time.

This pile of naked women is really coming alive. It moved a little faster than I had written on paper. So I I was very, you know, nothing ever goes like you expect it to, but I had very distinct steps, like we're gonna undress each other, and then we're gonna do this, and then we're gonna get the oil, and then we're gonna touch. Just the face and then everyone's gonna ask for consent and you're gonna start to communicate and say what you're OK with and this, that and the other.

And it was like before I knew it, people were on top of their partner at that time and using their entire bodies. So you're in the middle of this giant pile. What are you doing in there? Are you slithering around like an oily snake?

I, I was distributing the oil via my body because I'm an outside viewer. I'm looking in at this pile. I don't know. There was one point where I walked up to you.

I had to show you the time. I had to show you my time and you were just out of arm's reach. I had to reach way over and I was trying to just, I was just like squeezing your thumb, like just poop. Boop, wake up and your eyes were closed and you were gone.

It was like you were, what's that brand in Game of Thrones when he turns into the three-eyed crow Raven and his eyes go white. That was you in the middle of the pile. You were the three-eyed door. You were the.

Yeah, so I like, there's nothing more sensual than your entire body being taught at the same time. And when there's like legs and arms and hair and oil, and I don't even know what was touching me, honestly. I was just in like this, like being in a bathtub of warm water, but it was all women's skin and stuff. It was so.

Like I didn't really want it to end and you were trying to like wake me up or something. Unlike all the other people, you're working. I was so I, I have, I have to show you the time and sort of remind you we're on a clock here and there are some very horny husbands waiting out there. I just couldn't get your attention.

I was in a bubble bath full of women. Calon, take me away. Good for you, my 3 eyes. Whore, anyway, uh, congratulations on your giant girl on girl camp, uh, workshop.

I hope you're able to do it again. Yeah, I wanna do it like a once a month thing, I think. I want you to do it once a week or maybe twice a week so I can stay home. Of course you do.

Of course you do. I'm taking that. So I would like for that to happen if anybody's interested in, in that workshop that we just. Described, let us know.

So maybe we'll be able to do that. If you're interested in that, please get in touch with us. Let us know because it is something that we want to bring into the rotation. It's really interesting to hear what people would think.

I personally would love to see that mountain of naked ladies again. Congratulations. I think you did a great job. It was more than I had expected it to be.

You got a lot of great feedback. People. Even somebody on Twitter, uh, said something, emails and a lot of comments, and yeah, uh, it was really great. It was really, really, really awesome as far as the lights, smoke, and the music, perfect.

Oh please, that was perfect. All that stuff spot on in the reviews. I got all 100s, all A+. Thank you to all the girls who, uh, were my little guinea pigs at girl camp.

Yeah, there were a lot of people there and, uh, actually one of the ladies, Nikki from Our Naughty Escapades, was, was in the workshop and she, she really helped. I mean she just basically looked at you and said whatever you need. I am your body just tell whatever you want, just do it if it makes you, if it makes it easier, it makes you more comfortable, just do it. I, I will be your vessel.

And then there was one woman she She went out and she, uh, after the workshop, she just kind of walked past me. Usually, I thank everybody and was like, let me know what your feedback was, whatever. She walked straight past me, she went outside and like a few minutes later, she comes back in, gives me this huge hug and is apologizing because she smells like Cigarettes and she's like, listen, I don't even smoke, but I had to go have a cigarette. Well, I hope you're able to do it again.

We'll fix all that other stuff, not the music and the lights and the smoke because that was perfect and you'll learn how to talk in front of people. That's gonna be great. What room are you in? 84.

What room are you in? 7. What room are you in? 3.

What room are you in? 85. What room are you in? 58.

Have you ever been with a woman before? I have. Have you ever been with a woman? Yes.

Have you? Have you? Hell yes. Have you?

No. Are you attracted to women or is it something that you just have never been into? I, I find them beautiful, but I just have never had the opportunity. There are 4 women.

All of their nipples got hard at the same time when you first had your first experience. Were you nervous, like you didn't know what you were doing? Yeah, I didn't, I didn't have any idea what I was doing. When was the first time that you were with a woman?

The first gentle time was in a strip club. You learn with boys your whole life, and then you're faced with a vagina and you're like, I have one. But yeah, I didn't know if she liked her vagina used the same way I like my vagina used, so I'm like, am I doing it right? Am I not?

And how long have you known you've been attracted to women in general? Since birth. When was the first time that you were with a woman? About 3 years ago here.

Do you remember your first time? Yes, I do. Christmas Day at 2017. Santa brought you something very special.

Would you say that there's something different energy wise between woman on woman and a man and woman? Absolutely. Women are soft, sexy, sensual, and what better way to know your way around a vagina because we have one now. I ask you, my dear, you are surrounded right now by really beautiful women.

Do you see yourself maybe dipping your toes into the waters of sisterhood? Are you gonna help me? I can help. Would you say that you absolutely know what you're doing now?

No. Would you say that you 100% know what you're doing now? No. Do you know what you're doing?

Hell no. Do you know what you're doing? No. My question is, how would your parents react if you told them you were in soft porn?

I wouldn't tell them. You just wouldn't tell them. Would you tell them? No, you would never tell them tell them.

If, if they did find out in one word, what would be their reaction? My mom would ask me if I was lesbian, lesbian. I do soft porn, lesbian. One word, if your parents found out you were a soft porn actor, what would that one word be?

What? What? What would your one word be? Shit.

Do you know what your word would be? Death. Death, death, do you have any idea what your word would be? Inheritance gone.

Thank you so much, we really appreciate it. You are all beautiful and amazing, and we hope that all of you ladies on this side, at some point, jump on this lady on this side in a very seductive, loving way. All right, so that is about it. I just wanna say again, we're going to talk more about Project Yellow Band.

Sarah Clayton comes tomorrow, which won't be tomorrow for you, but it's tomorrow for us right now, and I know that she is bringing you a present. Yes, and it sounds a little like this Malibu strings. If those judgy PTA bitches could see you now. That joke was written by at Jeff_an_ Karen.

Yes, he's gonna bring you some Malibu strings and you guys are gonna do photos and we're gonna talk about the whole project yellow bath thing and see where that's going. Meanwhile, I hope your mom is not listening to this and If she is, I would like to assure her that right now at this instant, you are not naked and we do not do porn. However, if you would like to hire us for porn, please get in touch with the photographer at Desire and ask if we're available, and I will come all over your chat room. Uh, really quickly, again, we wanna thank all of the people that are booking through us.

It has made an amazing difference in our lives, Lauren. I was able to finally buy you the Hope Diamond. I thought you were gonna say a couch I wasn't allergic to. We did, we did get you a new couch.

How much is that couch? $350. $350. That breaks my back, but it is not moldy.

That's a win. Thank you for all the affiliate people. Remember, if you're gonna book your trip through Desire and you are able to do so, please go to our site, click on the link. It's like a portal.

It's like a like Stargate. It just brings you into the realm of desire, but we are clinging on. You with some sort of cookie and then we get a 10% commission for that and it helps us buy more uncomfortable furniture. It's a bath mat on on sticks and really quickly list our new Patreons.

All right, we have Tink and Peter, Leslie Ann, Henrik Frank, Corey, uh, SNA from Virginia, curious Canadians, Kevin and Charles. All right, thank you so much, guys. It doesn't go unnoticed. We really, really appreciate it.

Also, if you are interested. In that girl camp, girl on girl workshop thing, please reach out, let us know so we can incorporate that into the workshop schedule. When you come, you too can be in a mound of ladies, a bathtub of lady skin. And also, last but not least, if you were an Australian model working in Taipei in the 90s at some point and you found yourself in a room touching some innocent girl named Lauren, please reach out.

Maybe you're listening. That is That's about it. That's all I have. I can't laugh anymore.

I am like, oh my God, so good. It's so good to talk to you today, Richard. Yeah, I will talk to you tomorrow, Lauren. OK, hold on, let me look at my notes and see if I missed anything.

Mhm, mhm. You've, you've now hit 12,000 followers on Instagram. Yeah, 12,000. I can't break like the 4500 mark on Twitter and I've been on there for 7 years.

I will talk to you tomorrow when we wake up and Have the uh have the housekeeper wake me up around 7:30 of some things I need to do in the morning and uh we don't have a housekeeper. Great, have her bring the Tesla around front by at least 10, OK? I'll have it. It's all this Patreon money putting solar panels on the roof, which is odd because we rent.

I thought you put up the Tesla. Yeah, I'm throwing them on the Tesla too. It's gonna be horrible for the aerodynamics, but, but it's gonna look badass. And that about does it for us.

For more information, photos, or to contact us, go to room 77 podcast.com. Thanks for stopping by room 77. We had a blast. Now get your clothes and get out.