Ep. 50: How To Control A Foursome

This podcast contains explicit content, language, and sexual situations. It is intended for adults 18 years of age and older. These thoughts and opinions expressed are not those of any specific employer, group, or individual. And with the rat race, we decided to sell everything and move to Cancun, Mexico.

Now we do what we love work, party, and play in the middle of paradise. Now we want to share the fun that we get to have every day. Come to room 77. Let's play.

Alright, Lauren, here we are again. We started. How are you? Are you sure?

We had sex. Well, not you and I, I mean we had sex with another couple, right? And that happened not on the weekend, but uh I think on like a Wednesday night or something. Was it a Wednesday night?

Tuesday? Yeah, with a very strange, no, not a strange couple, they weren't strange, they were sort of strangers. Before we get to that story, we wanna mention Antigua 2022. We're gonna be there during.

Carnival. What are, what are the dates? July 29th through the 5th of August. So that means we're gonna probably go to a parade where I will wear feathers, I imagine, right?

I hope so. I'm seeing yellow feathers. That's what I'm seeing. I love it.

Also, we're gearing up for our Playa del Carmen sensation in November, uh, that is sold out. So if you wanna go, you can't, but maybe you can go to the next one. Come with us or come there, come while you're there. If you want to go to anywhere in the world and take your clothes off at any resort, where do they go, Lauren?

Go to room 77life.com and click on Lauren's box. Alright, now back to this strange stranger couple. We had met them once, like a long time ago, it's been a while, and then they went away to, they live in a very foreign, foreign land. It's like Narnia, but I can't tell you the country because it would give it away.

I think they're the only swim. from that country, they, they called us up and they said, hey, what are you guys doing? And we said, depends. What do you look like?

No, we knew what they look like. We had met them like 2 years ago. We said, uh, I don't know, we're not busy. Uh, we'd love to do something, but this is about control.

And when, when I say control, I mean control. Who has control? Yeah, it sounds like you're talking about BDSM. No, I'm not talking about BDSM control.

I'm talking about. Kind of control like Janet Jackson control like, so like who controls the play gate? Who holds the key? Who's the key master?

Are you on board? Are you not on board? I'm gonna take the, the wheel here, right, the rain or the wheel, whatever, whatever your mode of transportation is. I've upgraded from horses.

I'm just a Texan. I've worked my way into the 21st century. And I have a wheel now. OK, OK, it's not like I control who we do and don't have sex with.

I mean, it's like I'm usually the initiator of, yeah, I would like to pursue that. Yeah, it's just taking the wheel. That's what you said. That's how you were defining it, so it wasn't confusing.

We get it. We got it, and you do, and I appreciate that. This is something that usually I take on, but in this case you took it on. You took the email, and usually I will be like, hey, this is.

What's happening? Do you want to do this? Or you'll say, Hey, this person is asking, what do you want to do. This time you were like, we're doing this one.

Yeah, because I remembered them. Yeah, and I was like, Whoa, whoa, whoa, lady, you don't get control here, OK? I am, I am the gatekeeper or the keymaster, whatever one means that. Now remind me, and then you reminded me of the story of how we met them at the resort.

I immediately remembered who they are, and I said, Oh yes, I would like to have sex with them. Because we were supposed to do something and they got food poisoning and it was like, oh man, and we, they were leaving so soon after that, so we didn't have a time, like a redemption time like we'll get well and we'll see you in 3 days. It was just like, and I remember thinking, oh, I really wanted, I really wanted to be with them and, uh, so yeah, so they came back. So luckily we didn't have a lot going on, but this was very, very specific about this, this couple is he had gone through an email.

He's like, look, here's the thing. We're not very experienced. This is what we've done, this is what we're good at, this is what we want to accomplish. This is where we're gonna meet, this is where we're gonna have sex, OK?

If it happens, if it happens, it's gonna happen at all of these places in this order. I don't want you to be disappointed. I'm gonna tell you, these are the things I suck at. That was like a resume and I brought it up at dinner.

I was like, you wrote, well, I brought it up after dinner. It was like you wrote all of the things that you guys suck at, basically, and your goals and your goals, and, uh, let's go over your resume now and see if we can't move this, uh, in a forward positive direction. She was looking so beautiful that night. She's just, she's, she really is stunning, uh, to me they both are, yeah, they're both really good looking.

He's super handsome, but. She's way out of my league, and I know that, and I'm feeling disgusting right now because I, I can't get to the gym. I was intimidated by them because they are a rather good looking couple. The dinner went fine, but there's always that feeling that, you know, they had put out there.

Look, we're not that experienced. So that brings a bit of, but they're like, but we want you to help us get experience, so it puts a little pressure on at the beginning. It feels a little bit pressurey, right, because they're like, Well, you're gonna be the one that helps. experience, right?

And I'm like, I would be happy to stick my penis inside of you at any point if you want to do it after dessert, you want to do it in between, whatever, we'll do it. And I have to say, uh, we had one of the worst meals we've ever had in our lives in Mexico. It was absolutely horrific all around. Thank God we didn't pay for it because, uh, he did.

It wasn't cheap, but we all agreed it sucked. It was hysteric. Became like that common thing like this will be the best memory of the worst dinner, so. That just is like, I don't, I'm not even enjoying dinner.

Let's uh let's move on. Let's move on. So they had, they had a room at a separate hotel that they went and got for all of us. So we went up to this beautiful, this beautiful hotel, went up to this room.

Now under the circumstances, I, I mean, we, we had already talked two years ago about how we wanted to hook up with this couple. The decision was easy. It's not like you're contemplating it over dinner. It's it's not like a trial, but that clock.

Still exists right where it's just like eventually we're gonna finish the dinner, finish the drinks, and then we're gonna go upstairs, and then this is all gonna happen and it doesn't matter. We still at that point, it always gets like awkward and we already know because he's like, well, we're not good at this. We're not very experienced. He had called us the like the shaman, uh, the shaman couple after it was all over.

So we go into the room. What were you thinking at that point? Were you, well, we still hadn't. Decided if we wanted to just go in the room, drop our stuff and go grab another drink somewhere or something like on, on the roof and sit and, and then, but all you're doing is just prolonging the inevitable of jumping and just getting naked and let's start.

We don't need to be drunk to do anything. It's just that awkwardness that you're avoiding by, well, let's just continue to because I could talk to them forever. I could drink and, and they were, I had such a good time with them. They're great people.

But we couldn't drink because they closed all the bars at the hotel. So they, they closed all the bars at the hotel early, right? So here you are thinking like, oh, you know, if I'm nervous, I'll have another drink, and all of a sudden the master of the universe of the hotel comes over and says, no more drinking for you at 11 o'clock, earlier than that. It was it was like 9:30 or something, closed it at 10, and I'm like, oh, nobody, nobody was preparing for that.

Like, do you guys want one last drink? And we're like, whatever the strongest, biggest drink you have, I guess we're gonna have to make it last now. That's all we were getting. Well, maybe we could just go up on the roof for a little while and hang out there, you know, very quickly it wound up being like, what's the point of that?

And we're sort of sitting on this, this couch inside of the, inside of the room. I thought it was even, because I'm always like, I like to shower and I was like, should I shower? It just didn't feel. Right at that point, yeah, it was, it, it would have been more awkward, I think, to step away from the situation than to just get the party started.

I always bring a speaker, so we put the music on. We tried to set the lights, yeah, so it was, there were two things I remember in the room. It was super bright and super fucking cold. So I like, I turned the temperature down to a little above freezing.

Uh, I don't, I don't, I hate my body right now because I, I am in one of those slumps where I am just. I feel out of shape. I am out of shape. Just I don't feel my best self.

So I said, Do you mind if I turn off some of the lights? And he's like, No, not at all. I turn off every fucking light in there. You went, you went full, full.

It's like pitch black. He's like, Is this how you want it? I'm like, yeah, this is good. This is good for me.

Let's just, uh, you know, let's just keep it dark. He's like, Where's the bed? Can we just turn on like one? I'm like, uh, turn on the one in the corner.

It's fine, not that bright though, please, for fuck's sake. And both of their bodies, of course, are perfect, right? So that makes it even a little bit harder. It fucks with your psyche a bit.

One of the things that he had told us right from the giddy up, he was like, Look, I cannot have sex in a condom. I said, Well then you just fuck her bareback, and that was not the right answer. He's like, No, that's not what I mean. I was like, Oh, what did, what did you mean?

I said, he said, I just cannot fuck in a con like I cannot stay hard in a condo. I said, well, neither can I. Welcome to the club. Yeah, welcome to the club.

I mean, it's, it's fucking impossible. So here we are, you know, sharing stories like, yeah, samesy, Sasy, yeah, can't fuck with a condom. Me either. Bareback everybody.

That's what we do. Maybe tonight, I don't know. Don't worry about it. So basically what you're saying is like, look, if sex doesn't happen, I think he said this, if sex doesn't happen with you, Lauren, I want.

You to know that it's not because of you, and I will tell you that ahead of time because I'm just gonna tell you now because that's what's been happening to me in my experiences, right? But we're trying to learn. They're trying to, to gather more information, and I like that they present the information just like they did about everything else. It's like very upfront.

Here's what's going on. That's information I wanna know. You're gonna share it, right? Hey, by the way, when I have sex, I have full seizures.

That's something I wanna know. Just put me on my side and make me bite down on my wallet. That's how you handle it. This is stuff that you wanna know.

You know what I mean? Uh, I have sex Tourette's. I will, it's, it's happened before, you know, sometimes during sex, I will blurt out eighties bands, Bengals. Duran Durant, and that happens that some people have that affliction though like that he said, hey, during sex, if, if I'm gonna have sex with a condom, it's probably not gonna happen.

I mean, I'm like, yeah, bro, I get it. Same thing, feeling what you're throwing down, so it's fine. I didn't take an insult to it. He's talking about that.

Well, we start playing all together. Well, we start kissing first. You walk over to her. And she's already completely naked and you're just like, wow, I just, and he goes, I want you to kiss her.

And for some reason he turned around and grabbed a bite of chocolate that was laying on the plate that is in the room, right? And so you start kissing her and he turns back around to me and he's chewing and I'm like, he realized that that was the stupidest thing he could have done in that moment, but this is how. Learned when, when you are starting a play session, don't shove a piece of chocolate in your mouth right. Don't start nervous nibbling on things, uh, especially chocolate, because that's not something you can just swallow.

It's like it's like peanut butter. You got really gotta get rid of that. It's like a good 3 minute, yeah, commitment there. Yeah, it's like, all right, well, finish your treat.

We'll boy. Good boy. We'll pick this up. Yeah, but now, but look at that.

He will never ever get a play session going and then go grab a snack. He'll never do that again because that would be stupid. Yeah, I was just touching her body. She's such, so beautiful, and she has this beautiful tattoo on her body, and I was just sort of tracing it with my hands.

We went over to the bed, I think, again, I'm still feeling nervous and I'm looking at her body on mine and I for the life of. Me, my dick is like, nope, not tonight, Richard, and it's one of those situations again. It, it hasn't actually happened in a long time. Staring at my dick like, look at her.

Would you look? Are you seeing what I'm seeing? Yeah, like a petulant child with his arms crossed. I don't care.

I'm not gonna lie. I sort of, I do what I do, which is I like sort of excuse myself from the situation for a second. I'm like, I'm gonna. Go have a talk with my penis.

So I had watched the three of you on the bed, and he was really hard, the silhouette of the three of you with your bodies all sort of intertwined together and seeing him rock hard, and she sort of bent over like in doggy, boom, I got rock hard. I watched where you're like from the couch, you were like, fuck her. Put it, I was like her, I'll fuck her right now. I mean that's what.

I want to see, honestly, if I had a sketch pad, I, I think I could have drawn it. I, it was beautiful. Leo DiCaprio, like one of my French girls. I could have drawn that shit.

It would have been beautiful. Immediately I'm hard now. I'm hard as a rock, and I go over to you and I'm like, oh fuck me, because I like when I'm in a situation like that and I get nervous and my petulant child to have a penis. I wanna say, hey, uh, remember this.

I'm in charge. Remember the sex. Remember what it feels like inside of your wife, uh, and then it goes, oh yeah, this is fucking great. I remember this, and I want to get to that point where it's like, yeah, there's no turning back now, and we high five, right?

It's so funny because it's hard for women to understand this concept. Yeah, I know it sucks. I mean, it just sucks. It really just suck for you guys.

No, it sucks. I mean, awesome if we men had the penis abilities that we had as a teenager. In our 40s and 50s. I mean, honestly, we'd all be fucking rock stars.

There'd be so many sore women walking around, especially in the lifestyle. It'd be like, you know, guys would be walking around with pimp cups and shit. It would be crazy. It totally would be.

I'd line girls up and just be like bang bang bang like I'm shooting from the hip. I would, I'd wear a holster, yeah, and, and you can come too. It's not like you have to hold it because when you're younger you come a lot, right? Yeah, you come a lot.

You come a shit ton. It's like you're spilling a bottle of coconut milk and you don't get fat and, uh, you don't care about anything and you know it all and it's great. That would be fun. So you start, we start fucking.

They're fucking. It was a lot of fun and then I laid back. Right, and she started blowing me and she gave such a great blowjob. There's something about when you can see like she had this really long blonde hair.

She had one rule, by the way. She's, do not pull my hair. And I was like, All right, she's like, don't ever pull my hair. It's hard to do when someone's blowing you that well because it's almost like an, an instinct for me because, uh, most women.

I do sort of enjoy that that grabby grab with the hair, not even like pulling it. It's just like, well, otherwise you just feel like you're just sitting there like, like I'm a sultan, and you just have to do nothing with your hands. Like what are you gonna do? Like, well then I'm touching her head like I'm wearing oven mitts, right?

Like I'm just sort of petting her, right? She should have given you a brush, yeah, yeah, like brush touch her with my fists only with my hands, my fingers closed so I don't pull her hair but she. It was phenomenal, phenomenal. I could have almost came just with her blowing me.

Uh, I loved it. I really did. Seeing her in her hair and then her ass sort of sprung up on the side, and then you were next to me, or he was next to me. I was, yeah, yeah, I was blowing him next to you.

Yeah, he was next to me. He was really hard, and then I was like, why don't you fuck her? And I was like, oh, maybe I shouldn't have said that because now maybe. That's gonna get into his mind.

So he went around while she was blowing me and started fucking her from behind. I mean, he was railing on her pretty good. But then, uh, while I'm getting harder and harder and almost ready to come, he's starting to lose his erection because he's now getting anxiety. Again.

He had warned, this is something that, that happens to me, which is why I need practice. And, you know, we handle it like we, we all do. We laugh and point. You know what I mean, we made tweets.

Yeah, we say, you loser. Yeah, look at you photos. Jesus, you flaccid, flaccid man. No, we don't do that.

Obviously we, we do what we always do. We're like, don't worry about it. Just I couldn't even communicate. I was like watching what was going on with my vibe.

Vibrator and like coming over and over again so I'm like whatever I don't it's so hot yeah you've gotten to the point where you don't even need anyone anymore you just sit there with a vibrator and have your own little party. Well, it's like I, I'm really visually stimulated. It's like whatever happens I'm fine with so. It's not like a bad thing, but yeah, I turned to, uh, to her or him.

I don't know. I don't just ask somebody, can I fuck her? I'm not even sure if it was her. I could have asked you.

I, I don't really even remember. I'm like, honey, go get a condom. I have to have sex with her, right? Uh, obviously now while he's flaccid, so I can emasculate him more.

So he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, go ahead, right? So I, I have you, you grab a condom, you give it to me upside down, uh, but you told me it was upside down, which I thought was very impressive that you remembered, hey, make sure when you take it out of the wrapper, it's right side up so I can put it on like, like a surgeon putting on gloves, right? Boom, scalpel, that's what I need. I'm in.

It's, it's an emergency. Put the gloves on and it goes in. I'm trained. I have passed this class.

You're a great partner, honestly. So I put it on and, uh, I. I start fucking her and I am, I'm in heaven. I mean, she felt amazing.

She said, How do you want me? I said, just on your back. It's like this. Why?

Because I want to look down and I want to see every part of you, right? And I did. I, and I, I, I, I was fucking her. He was, he was getting blown by her, but he was still having a few issues.

But you were doing your own, you were having your own porn film on the side with your vibrator, and I got to a point where I'm like, Oh my God, I'm gonna come in my condo. I just told him, yeah, I got the same problem, dude, and I'm just gonna look like a giant liar. And here I am like 4 minutes in and I'm like, oh my God, I'm gonna come. Oh, fuck, we're the same.

Yeah, but there's, I was so turned on and so aroused. So I, I kept it back a few times, right? And even some women are like, I know you're wearing a condom. I still don't want you to come in me, right?

So that's always like why I say I, I'm gonna come or I'm close, right? I want you to be able to physically kick me out of you, right, if you're, if you're not comfortable or just give me some sort of sign, uh, get out of me. I do not want your swinger baby. Well, and he, and he had told us before too that he really wanted to see someone fuck his wife.

That was one of his things. That was one of the things that he specifically said. He was like, I want to watch her have sex. I want to watch her.

I enjoy watching her, he said. I enjoy watching her. I said, OK. Great.

So I did my best to, and I did pretty good. I think I did pretty good. I don't know. I don't know.

I don't know. I just try not to lose my breath. I thought you were doing really, really good. You were doing, um, I was an extended period of cardio, which was very impressive.

I know. Thank you. I've been jumping rope. I've been trying, yeah, and, uh, so one of the things I've been trying to do is go under and up, like it really hit that top part of the vagina, yeah, just so because what your cock is perfect for.

Yeah, it's got to curve up, right? So I want, I want. A person to feel them getting hit on the top wall of their vagina. That's, that's my goal in life is my penis wants to feel the top upper roof of your vagina.

Did I tell the lady at the grocery store that she looks at me. No, she shouldn't. She knows what you're talking about. So, and she brings me in tighter.

Like she wants me in deeper, right? And I'm like, Oh, you bitch, now I really, really am gonna come. I'm going to town on her. Like I'm, I mean, I'm just for me anyway, but.

Not too much. Like, I'm not like, all right, turn around, let me get you a doggy while I slap your ass because I didn't want to, I didn't want to take it too far, and I'm definitely not pulling her hair, and I'm not choking her. I'm just staying right in my lane. Yes, you were.

You're, you're playing your role of, uh, fuck my wife. But then it comes over me. I'm like, I don't want to be that dick that's like, oh, he's just going to town on my wife forever, and now it's just all about him, because that's happened to me before, where I've even been in a position where I've come. Right.

And then the guy is like still going to town on you and you're like, we're finished. She's kind of finished now. I mean, it's cool if you want to take a few more minutes, but like the end should be near, yeah, because like we're in this together, so you're more than happy to come now anytime, yeah, and then you hint to it. He's like, oh no, I'm nowhere near finished, and you're like, oh yes you are.

I'll just crawl away then, yeah, no, because we turn on the lights and we say last call. Oh, last call. That's how it works out. We'll play you off like the Emmys.

Get off the stage. Yeah, so that's, that's what I don't want to happen. Like I don't want him to think like it's just me fucking his wife right now, right? So I, I turned to him, I said, Are you OK?

Are you, are you OK? He said, Yeah. And I, I'm not inside of her anymore when I take this moment. She's sort of looking up at me.

I'm gonna say her eyes are glazed over. That's how much love and I'm giving her. Uh, they probably weren't. It was just really dark in there, and She said to me something that nobody has ever said, but it was the greatest, the greatest line any woman has ever said to me, and how she said it.

I checked in with her and I said, How are you feeling? I mean, she stared me right in the eye and she went, empty. Oh damn. Oh damn, girl.

Oh my God. So Richard sticks his pretend big cock back inside of her, starts to go to town. Now I was so turned on, right, this time I said to her, I was like, I'm gonna come. I'm giving her that warning.

This is where you, you, you know, stranger danger, kick me out. You pass the control over, pass the control over to you. You do whatever. So I thought, you know, she was gonna sort of squirm out of there, you know, maybe I'll rip off the condom and calm on her leg in a sad, pathetic way, as I usually do.

But she gets, she crawls closer. She's the ability like a a feral animal, she crawls closer to me using only her butt cheeks and wraps her legs around me and sort of like a glute bridge. She did like this glute bridge thing where she lifted her, her pelvis up and was like pulling you in and then started doing these like tiny strip. Circles or something right up on your cock riding you so hard I was like oh my God, I'm stealing that move.

Yeah, what did you just call it glute bridge glute bridge she glute bridged me she totally did. She glute bridged me and I was so deep inside of her and I just, I, I came all over her cervix, I think with a condom with a condom on, right? No, no, no. And I was like, oh my, I was shaking, that's how hard I came.

And uh they seemed to have a good time, and then uh they, they were like, uh, we're gonna go. Pros, you're like, you're not an amateur, you're a pro. Well, not, I didn't say they weren't amateurs, but they, you don't think it's, it's, it's weird that we're just gonna leave, do you? And I was like, have you listened to the podcast?

It ends with, get your clothes and get out. That's our thing. You're, you're good. You're good to go.

But we'll give you a ride back. But we gave him a ride back to the hotel, uh, and it was an amazing time. But again, and he grabbed another piece of chocolate. He did.

He finished. He, he bookended it. Tapped it out with grabbing one more piece of chocolate. It was so epic.

Anyway, I would commit to having sex with her all the time. I don't think she would agree with that, but I would, I, I just, I need to get in better shape. I just, I don't like when my confidence is low. It's you.

You're so hard on yourself. Everyone always says that about you though. They're like, oh, whether he's out of breath or whether he thinks he has a small penis, it's like your thing, yeah. Everybody knows what I'm talking about when they, when they feel gross, that you just, you just feel gross.

You just, there's days where you, time, I should say periods, there's periods where you feel like a water balloon. You just feel it and it affects you, um, but you get your confidence back up, but you again walked away from this, uh, situation again, uh, did not have sex with a stranger. It's OK. I still came and I had a super hot night to the point where you were laying on the bed.

Everybody was finished, and I think gathering their clothes, and you're like, I'm still coming. I'm still coming. And I said to you, Hey, wrap it up. Turn the thing off.

Wrap it up, lady. We're done. Strike the set. We're out.

Sometimes it's so like if I come that that hard watching and like all the factors, it's visual, it's lights, it's, it's the sounds, all of that is such a turn on for me that if I hit that level it's really hard for me to stop coming. I just need like 2 more minutes we have maybe 5 more minutes. We have to get on with our lives too. So that's it.

I mean, I, I enjoyed the giving up control part of it. There's a lot of parts of that where I just sort of gave up control, like Janet Jackson control. I just gave it up, whether it was the couple that you decided that we were going to hook up with, the, the plan that he decided, where all of that stuff. I just sort of, you just showed up.

I just showed up. You did your duty. I did. I did my duty all in her vagina.

that. I hope she had a good time. I really do. I, I hope he had a good time.

Lovely people. Hope to see them again. Thank you for doing your glute bridge on me. Yeah, totally.

I'm, I'm totally stealing that move. That's a good move, man. I mean, that is, I'm gonna start training for it. You know what we should do?

We'll do it in the gym tomorrow. We'll practice, you and I, in the gym in front of everyone. We'll do glute bridges. You have to do them using me.

Perfect. How long do you think until we get thrown out? I think they'll just be like, oh, that's just Richard and Lauren. It's just what they do.

No Alright, now this is the most important part of the podcast. This is the Patreon part, and this is where I tell you why it's so important that you keep supporting us. Now, the Patreons that support us are super important. They allow us to live.

They allow us to to buy certain things like electricity. So that's really cool for us. Uh, it works out, but I wanna share with the Patreons this month, and we'll, we're gonna name them in, in a few seconds, how you saved me this time. I'm gonna tell you a short story, and I don't want it to get dramatic.

I don't want it to pull at your heartstrings, but if it makes you give more. I understand. Instead of buying a car, which is super expensive, we went out and bought a little motorcycle, a little 310 motorcycle, in case Lauren gets hit by a bus or a plane or a train or a ship, anything, I could get to her, maybe not a ship. So, now on this motorcycle, I bought a little carrier thing so it can hold my phone, because if you know me, which you all do, I don't have any sense of direction.

So I have to have navigation running at all times, otherwise I make a left when I should make a right or I go up instead of down. It's horrible. So I put the thing on the motorcycle and then put you on back and you're gonna act like you're, you're having fun, not in fact, like you're scared to death, because that's what you look like. Anyway, we got onto the road and the phone flew off into the road.

I jumped off the bike and I ran out to the highway and I watched my phone get run over by not 1, not 2, but 5 cars and 3 buses. And every time a bus ran over my phone, it would fly up into the air. And then crashed down on the ground. It would line up perfect in the tracks of the next bus that was coming, and it would get run over again and again and again.

And I ran out and I got my phone. The otter box was fine, so that was good. But the phone was demolished and uh I had to get a new phone. So Patreons, you replaced my phone that got ran over by a bus or 7 buses, uh, and I want to thank you for that because I I really love my phone.

It was a Pixel 4A, nothing fancy, just, uh, you know, 4A. I didn't go 5 or 6 or whatever they're up to now because I'm a. Responsible human being. You spend money very efficiently, right?

Uh, so thank you for that, and, uh, I'm gonna tell you who the Patreons are that got me my replacement phone because my other phone is dead. I mean really dead. It's smashed. It's, it's gone.

It's never coming back. Thank you, Tim DC, another guy. Lisa, Cameron, British American Hybrid, Chris Hopper, CJ Crazy, Steven's cousin, John Buck, Danielle, and Darren UK. If you two want to support and keep listening to this and help us do what we do, go over to patreon.com/room77 and give.

We do accept phones as. Alright, Lauren, we are here with two people that are absolute complete strangers to me. I don't even know who they are, but I love them dearly already. We really don't know them.

We've never met them. I am oddly sexually attracted to them though. They are coming to the sensation takeover, which is sold out, by the way. I just wanna let, we are 1234 for 4 on the event sides of sold out.

Richard. They were one of the first people that booked because they have a special place. These two wonderful folks are kind of new into the lifestyle. In fact, they hadn't been in an environment where they were naked in public, knowing that they would have to be naked in public at sensation.

Well, not, they didn't have to be, but in preparation, in preparation, they made, right, they made a trip to a resort in preparation, and I want to talk a little bit about that. But there's a few things that I want to mention 1st. 1st of all, we have a telegram group for this sensation group. The young lady.

He just sent a photo of her ass this morning in the Telegram group and she shared with everybody because she's a sharer. I gotta say we see a lot of naked photos, but that one I've clicked on this morning. I was like, damn, I can't. Did you see it?

Yeah, that was really hot, right? It almost looked like a fake. It like magazine. It did.

I still don't trust that it's her. I thought it was perhaps stolen, like it was a screenshot. That's what I thought at the beginning. I was like, young lady, was it stolen?

No, that is you tattoos totally me. Yeah, I, I, I have that tattoo on my ass. All right, I would introduce yourself, but nobody really cares. So I'm gonna just, uh, I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna keep going here.

I'll tell you as a compliment, it is always a good sign when you send a photo on like Telegram and my finger wants to touch the screen. That's the feeling that I had today. All right, just, just out of curiosity, what are you two sitting on right now, furniture-wise? We're actually sitting on bar stools that we went and bought because.

We're tired of not having any place to sit. So it's an upgrade. It's a major upgrade from the boxes. How much furniture do you have?

We have 4 bar stools and and some air mattresses. That's a step up though, because before you were talking to us from boxes. Yeah, no mattress either. Yeah, so that's good.

We're coming up in the world. Yeah, we're all grown up now. Now you just moved into this area. We moved here from overseas.

You weren't really in the lifestyle until you wound up with crazy. Neighbors. Well, I wouldn't call them crazy. I think they were, no, they were crazy.

OK, yeah, they were crazy. And you just, you basically weren't really in the lifestyle, you just wound up having sex with your neighbors. Is that correct? Yeah.

Is that what led you to room 77? That's what led me to room 77. Yeah, Jeff went on like a research rampage for several months. Like this is how it's supposed to be and this is what the lifestyle.

You then I guess saw the the takeover event and decided. To book that trip. Yeah, it was kind of sort of like my retirement vacation slash honeymoon. We didn't, we, we didn't actually have a real true honeymoon when we first got married 12 years ago.

So, so we are, we are your honeymoon. You're, you're, you're our honeymoon. We should change the entire name of the event. Yeah, I'm gonna have to get something special, do something, yeah, and I have to like decorate the room or something.

This is a lot of pressure. Oh my God, I'm so excited though. That's wonderful. To be chosen for your hoary honeymoon.

We spent a lot of years moving, moving around in the military and deployments and stuff, so we never actually had a true honeymoon vacation. This is really, oh man, the pressure is really on. I mean, you know, I'm just gonna give you your, I'm gonna give you your money back right now. Just, just take it.

It's, it's fine. Now, we're gonna make sure that you have a lot of fun. I don't care what it takes. Whatever, whatever you need, just ask us and I'll have Kat do it.

So you had sort of had the sex with the other people, but you never really experienced it in a, in a group setting like a party or a a a resort or, or anything like that. So did you feel anxiety and feel like we have to go get naked somewhere? That's exactly the way that this happened. I'm like, you know, you know, we've been talking to all these people and uh we're gonna have to get naked in front of them and that kind of weirds me out.

A little bit. So let's go get naked somewhere. Well, I know we've been practicing using condoms too, because that's a new thing. Oh my God, that's so like professional of you.

I know it's a, it's a, it's homework. It's a good decision. You're not gonna enjoy them, but, uh, but they are, they are kind of a prerequisite necessary, uh, item in the lifestyle. Laura and I are gonna try to invent a spray.

That makes it easier. It's probably gonna, I'll invest. It's pretty much just water, but you just tell people, yeah, it's, it's gonna be made of minerals this way it doesn't have to go through FDA or anything like that. Yeah, it's all vitamins.

It's that's what we should do is just sage the couples. And then you're clean. Yeah, you don't have any STDs and you won't get pregnant. All right, so let me, let me start with this really quick.

So you decide to go to a resort that is clothing optional. Yes. All right. How many times have you been there?

Just the one time. How many people are you expecting to be there or, or hoping for? They do it every Saturday. It's like a pool party like every week.

I wasn't really sure how many people would be there. I was, I was thinking maybe 30, 40 people. So how many people were there when you showed up at this hotel? It's a hotel.

Should we use the name of the hotel? You can. I don't know. Where is it?

What is it? It's Secrets Hideaway Resort and Spa in Orlando. No, I mean he doesn't have to get the whole TripAdvisor. Yeah, is there, is there a spa attached to this, this hotel?

You know, if there was a spa, we never saw one, right? It's just gonna attach spa to everything. Room 77, podcast and spa. I think the spa might have playroom.

I don't know. All right, so how many people were there when you, when you got there this weekend or that weekend? It was, it was over 100. I would say at any given time there was probably 40 to 50 people in the pool and then outside of the pool was full too.

It was, it was a full house. Oh wow. Yeah, they didn't have enough chairs out. I had to go find some and just like plop them down wherever I could find space.

Now, how many of these, of this 100, how many of them are naked, actually naked, fully naked? I would say about half. It's about normal. It's about normal.

And now I'm gonna split it up again because a lot of people ask these questions because they've never been to a clothing optional place or they've never taken their clothes off in public. How many of the people of that 50%, how many were women and how many were men? Pretty close to 50/50. There's a lot of couples there.

All right, so you get, you get there, you show up. Up, you have to pay your money. Is that when your heart starts racing a little bit? My heart was racing in the car ride there, but then once we got inside, I don't know, it was just pay the dues and get naked.

Oh my gosh, so you've got to tell them about it. So we walked in, we got, we paid. You go. So where do I change?

And the kind of like, it's a. What were you planning on changing into? I, I assumed that there was like lockers there, so I thought we'd go put all of our stuff in a locker and get, get naked and put all of our shit in a locker, but. And then come outside naked.

Yeah, well, I guess that's a, that's a legitimate question if you've never done this before, right? Like when you go to a skating rink, you're like, where do I put my shoes? Well, he's, he said he's military. He's coming from that locker room mentality where you go, you put your shit away, you walk out naked or in your towel, and you drop your towel.

At least that's how it it happens in my brain. And Val Kilmer's there and Tom Cruise. All right, so how long till you get to the chair? So now they tell you there's no locker rooms, you're an idiot.

Just get undressed here. How long does it take you to take off your clothes? From the time it took us to, to actually find chairs and set them down, a couple of minutes, 5 minutes. I was, I was butt, I was butt naked as soon as possible.

That was really good. No, no thinking. Rip the band-aid off. Both of you did.

Yes, yeah, because we had like a little competition as to who could, who would do it. Were you just staring at genitals the entire time? Basically they had, well they had like games where like they were entertaining us up at the side of the pool, so there was some entertainment to watch and I thought it was going to be kind of creepy just like you're just kind of sitting there like looking at everybody's junk, but you know it was, it ended up being pretty fun. That's what you're supposed to do.

We, we want, we want you to look at our junk. And it's funny too, like the first time when you're standing there and you're having a conversation and you're within conversation proximity, but you realize that you're naked in the water. How is that? I always found that to be a funny moment.

Honestly, once we hit the water, man, as soon as my genitals hit the cold water, I was completely relaxed. At any point while you're out in the open, do you get an erection? Oh yeah, yeah, he told me I did in the pool. You got an erection in the pool, in the pool.

All right, what? Doing what? Talking to a stranger? No, no, I was, we were, we were kind of floating at the edge of the pool and um I had Gypsy floating on my lap and we were just.

Like looking around and and then he put it in me. So, oh, so you fucked in the pool. Yeah, you guys are moving way too fast for us. Seriously, did you see any other public sex while you were there?

So you saw some finger banging. Yep, I think it was fun watching the, watching the people watch the finger banging because again, I didn't know, like, do I look, do I not look? Like I have this problem in the gym too, like I don't know where to put my eyes. Wait, you see people finger banging in your gym?

I go to the best gym, man. Yeah, where do I get that membership? This is what sunglasses are for. Oh, I didn't have reflective sunglasses.

Like I was sitting on his lap and I saw Jim right next to us. There was a super hot couple and she like started stroking his cock like on the side, and he was like, you could tell his cock was like 1 mile long. Did you hook up with anybody while you were there? We did not.

Oh, losers. You're giving him shit the whole time about moving too fast and then you're like, you, do you feel confident now going to, to our event and dropping row? It makes me feel better because really once, once everything was bared, it was just everybody was kind of naked and it was just like the norm. It is strange though.

I, I don't think the people who don't experience. I don't think they realize, and it's hard to explain to people how quickly you become acclimated to everyone being naked around you. It's like, it's, it's like after, I don't know, 30 minutes and then an hour, you're just like, all right, I'm kind of bored with this now. It's just norm.

I was just hoping that Jeff got out of the pool with a raging heart on. I dared him to. I, I was like, he's like, I can't. I just know that that's I can't do that.

He didn't want to be the first one. We didn't. We were watching like, OK, that one. We'll, we'll make that happen in a while.

I, I don't even know how far out we are, about a month, I'm guessing. Well, we'll be about by the time this airs, it'll be about a month. Why did you not hook up with anybody while you were there? Was that a choice, or did, did anybody hit on you?

Nobody really hit on us. I think we. I had made the decision not to play with anybody while we were there because, you know, sensory overload too much too fast. Like it was kind of a trip for us to just be comfortable with getting naked.

Yeah, I understand that. Yeah, it's a lot of anxiety. He has one goal. He's got one mission.

He's going to accomplish it and then they'll come back and do something else. Yeah, we did go to the playroom and have some, some fun time in there with each other, but there were People, it was, there were only like 2 other couples. I thought there were 5 other couples, but there were only 2 other couples because it was really dark and like I wish they knew she was really drunk. But so there was this couple on the end and it was the giant schlong couple, and then they left or I thought they left.

But then after a little while, after a little while, Jeff repositioned me and come to find out later, he repositioned so the giant schlong couple could actually see what we were doing. So I think if we had just stayed longer, like maybe something would have come out of that. But did they stay? Yeah, see they were a couple like little beds or sofas over from us, and they got up and repositioned right over near us on another bed.

I kind of moved her into a more revealing position so they could get a good view of what was going on and then they ended up leaving and then what did you do wrong? Nothing. They were, maybe they were just wanting to look, you know, watch. They finished up what they were doing and they, they left and then they came back.

Let me tell you what happened outside of that door is, I'm guessing like one of them left and then they went out of there and like, why did you leave? You're like, what do you mean you leave? That couple was in there. I know, but I felt weird.

I know, but we should go back in. Really? Well, now it's weird. If we go back in, do you think they're gonna come out?

I don't know. Let's just go back in. I'm imagining something like that happened outside, which is pretty normal, right outside bickering like, well, why did you finish? Why wasn't finished?

I didn't know they were there. It was too dark. I couldn't see your face. And if you're saying like, let's go, well, if you want to go back in, then let's go back in.

Oh, and now it's gonna be super awkward. No, we'll just go. No, we're just gonna go back in. We're gonna sit back down and we're gonna pretend like we're playing it.

What if we, we go back in, they're just finishing. How awkward. At that point we have to stay. We can't just follow them out again because then we're gonna look like we're stalking them.

I'm gonna go to the restroom and you decide. Why do you always go to the restroom at these points? This is so inconvenient. That's a conversation that Lauren and Richard would have at a resort outside of a playroom.

I'm not gonna say that that has happened before, but that has happened before. I'm like, I'm usually the oblivious one. Yeah, usually Lauren's like, Who? There was other people.

Well, that's what I said, like, I thought there were like 5 couples. It turns out it was just that, you know, one couple who was moving around trying to get a better angle on what we were doing. I was like, I don't know. But that's a professional move by them to get up and change beds and move closer to what you.

Want this is like professional stuff and but then Jeff did it too and then that's what I was gonna say A++ student. Yeah, he's a, he's a fast learner this one. I, I just wanna ask Jeff this question. Lauren thinks you're 6'2 and I don't know why.

But you had told us that you are not 6'2, but I do know, I do know that you told us that you run a 4.8, 4.4, 4.4 minute mile. Is that true? That is the fastest mile that I've ever ran. That's in.

Insane. OK, how fast is it like if you just run it now? If I were to go out and run just one mile as hard as I could, maybe 5:45, it takes, that's ridiculous. It takes me like 2020, 30 minutes.

I mean, I'm walking. I'm like a 10. I'm like, I think 9:30 is about if I just go. Do you do a lot of cardio?

I do. Being in the Marine Corps, we have to do a physical fitness test, which requires us to do a 3 mile run every year. So at any given time they could call us in to do a physical fitness test. So I'm always doing cardio.

Gypsy, do you, do you do any cardio at all? I try really hard not to, not to. But you go to the gym because we know this because you creepily watch people. So we know this already.

What are you doing at the gym? Like squats and deadlifts and lifting heavy things and yeah, just watching people. I just stand there and watch. I can't get on the logical and I pretend that I'm moving.

If that photo is accurate, you do seem to do a lot of the butt, a lot of the squats in the butts. All right guys, tell us before you go what you're looking most forward to come November at Sensation Playa del Carbon. I have a very, very specific goal, and as long as this happens, it'll be a good trip. Oh God.

Is it? Do we, are we allowed to know? Yeah, can I tell them I wanna have sex by the pool in one of those beds with me or just got rid of all the beds. OK, whatever.

I'll stand up. No, you should, you should. I hope you have sex. I'm gonna make you have sex outside.

I'm gonna make this happen now. What day do you want it, want it to happen on? You want it to happen on the 1st? Do you want it on the 1st day, the 2nd day?

What day is good for you? Do you wanna like chill for a day? 2nd day, 2nd day is good. I think the foam party is the 2nd day.

It is, right? Yeah, so you can get covered in foam, have a good dance, and then a little fucking afterwards. Yeah, it'll be a little, a little bit more obscured. Did you know we were having a foam party?

I didn't even know you were having a foam party. Neither did I. Pay attention. Are we having a foam party?

Yes, I'm, I'm super excited. I'm gonna watch you the way you watch others in your gym, and we're gonna call it the consummation of their marriage. Well, thanks. I can make like a small 8 millimeter film like something, you know, artsy for your for your honeymoon wedding video.

I like that. I like that a lot, yeah, we're full service. Yes. Well, we're gonna let everybody know that that happens, if that happens.

If you fail, we'll mock you and tease you forever. I would expect nothing less. All right guys, we will see you soon. We'll meet you soon.

Well, I can't wait to meet those two. They're gonna be a lot of fun. I feel like they're gonna be bubbly and feel right at home, and we're gonna be fast friends. I have a feeling.

I just hope they're good at oral. That was my hope. So we want to wrap things up. I wanted to talk a little bit about this bikini company that I like called Bikini Addiction.

I don't know if you've heard of them. I have actually. Now here's why I talk about them. I was reading the news the other week.

I read this article that some of these other companies. are making these bikinis out of this material, and I don't know why this is happening. The, the article said that some of these things are exploding. Lithium batteries.

Yeah, I don't know if they're making them out of lithium batteries or, or what, but these bikini companies, they're, they're literally exploding. It's dangerous. And if there's one thing that this podcast is for, it's to look out for your safety. I mean, that's what we do now.

This, this company, particular company, Bikini Addiction, they make their bikinis out of a Special material that only harnesses positive energy of people. Yeah, and as of now, as far as the TSA and uh the FDA and and the DA and the FFA and the DEA is the only bikini that you're allowed to keep in your carry-on. Yeah, that's how safe a bikini addiction, whatever material they're using is completely safe and will not explode on your body and give you 3rd, maybe 4th degree burns. They don't harness positive energy.

Tell them how can they get their hands on one of these bikini addictions. Well, you can go over to bikiniaddiction.com, use our promo code room 77 for 10% off, or you can book, travel with me, and I'll give you a free one when you do 5 nights anywhere. Go take your clothes off, yeah, especially if they're on fire. Be careful out there.

Jesus, kini addiction. We're thinking about doing another tier for the Patreon, which is called Lawrence's Butt. Now, what it is is it's like $1000. I just want some feedback on this one.

What they do is you pay $1000 right? They're a list of items. Maybe lipstick, a pen, a bottle of water, whatever you could pick from anything on that list, and you could put those in your butt if you have joined this possible tier that we're making. Yeah, larger's butt, you pay a tier amount and then you're like, I choose an orange.

Oh, I don't, I don't know. I don't know if that's good. Red Bull can. No God, what is wrong with you?

A banana. I pick a banana. What happens is, is the next time you see Lauren, you can take that item and put it up her bubble. So let us know what you think about that tier.

Also, we wanna stress this. This is not a sexual service. No, God, no, performance art. No, this is artistic expression that about does it for us.

For more information, photos, or to contact us, go to room 77 podcast.com. Thanks for stopping by room 77. We had a blast. Now get your clothes and get out.

I want you for. Go to steal. We don't have I was there the