Ep. 27: How To MMF at Desire Resorts

This podcast contains explicit content, language, and sexual situations. It is intended for adults 18 years of age and older. These thoughts and opinions expressed are not those of any specific employer, group, or individual. Fed up with the rat race, we decided to sell everything and move to Cancun, Mexico.

Now we We do what we love. Work, party, and play at the Desire resorts. After 16 years in the lifestyle, we thought we saw it all. We were so wrong.

So wrong. Oh my God, so wrong. Now we want to share the fun that we get to have every day. So come to room 77.

Let's play. All right, Lauren, here we are. I'm here back from our vacation. Yeah, we didn't really come up with a name for it, vacation.

No, I was telling people it was a sexcation. So what we're talking about is we stayed two nights at Desire RM as guests. Our listener is probably like, how would you do? This, you are not a wealthy being.

How do you possibly do this? So let us explain. So every time someone books through us through the website and uses our little banner thing, we not only get 10%, but we also get points. These points add up and add up and add up.

Now for a long time we were like, I don't know what the fuck we're gonna do with these points. Yeah, I didn't really understand the point system. We didn't really understand how it worked. And then they did the thing at the resort where they're like you can't have sex with the guests and we're like, oh, sad clown.

So then we're like, well, hey, what about those points? Can we actually stay there as guests? So it is just a giant thank you to all the people who booked through us because you are allowing us to actually stay there and if you are one of those people that book through us while you're there, apparently we will have sex with you. That's kind of what happened this time.

It's just a tip to the story, yeah. So, so thank you for that, but that is how we stay there. So we do stay there, not for free, but we don't pay for it. We wound up having a really great time, and we're gonna tell you about it eventually, but first, what I wanna say to you, we had 3 different kinds of playtime or hookups, OK, but each.

One of them were very sort of different. So I am going to ask you at the end which one was your favorite. I have a favorite in my head. Well, yeah, I have a few favorites.

I was excited. I was super excited. I had an erection the entire time. I had the whole car ride there and I was steering with my penis.

I don't know if you noticed that I took it out of my pants. I was just holding the wheels. We have not actually stayed at Desire as guests since 2016. Is that correct?

And we have never stayed overnight at Desire RM. So we roll up and we're like, ah, this is gonna be weird because we're walking in like the staff doesn't know, the front desk doesn't know. Nobody knows. So like a bulletin went out.

So we roll up to the guard shack and we're like, holacomosta. We get it, yeah. So we got checked in. I wanted yellow bands.

Yeah, we didn't get yellow bands. I really wanted a yellow band, honey, and you were like, ask for one then. Why did you want a yellow band? I don't know.

I just wanted to, I mean, I knew we wouldn't be able to walk in the shoes of a true yellow bander, I guess. Just wanted probably more mockery than anything. Then it just opens us up to, so first time, huh? Yeah, that's what I wanted to do.

Why do you know where that conversation goes? Think about it, because the answer isn't, yep, great being here. Awesome. It's such a lame conversation to have if you're actually lying about it, so.

It's like I don't wanna go down that road. Yeah, you're right. I have 48 hours. I need to not waste any of these times.

I'm busy. I have an entire hotel to go down on. I don't have time for this shit. Yeah, someone texted and they said, uh, I went down on them.

No, no, they said, um, so did, uh, was there a line? Did you take tickets? That's just about. So we go to the pool, no chairs as usual.

He's like, Hey guys, here, go to your spot in the corner by the plants, by the planter, you know, you know where we shove you guys. So immediately we're like, Hey, let's get our drink on as quickly as possible. Plan is to get into the pool and find people to molest. Well, we still had some affiliates there.

That's not my problem. So you're off the clock. I'm a guest now. I'm a West Best testes West now my plan.

to get drunk and you just jumped into the activities. It was not my first choice to do. Well, they were playing volleyball. Both of the playmakers were in there.

Both of the girls were in there, and I just really wanted to go and hug them. So yeah, but you wound up in an active game which then drew me into the active game, and I'm on an agenda right now. I know, but it was fun. I didn't have time to play volleyball, so our friends came.

So we went and ate with our friends. So we sit down with them. Basically have a lunch meeting about when we are all gonna get naked together. Hi, thank you for coming.

Thank you for joining us. What time? late afternoon we're gonna go get a little bit freaky. There are good people like that where you're comfortable and you can just say like, hey, yeah, a big part of the reason that we stayed these two days was because they were going to be there at that time.

So that happened. So then we went up to go check for the room, and it's jacuzzi time, right? So we go up to the jacuzzi. So I challenge you.

You didn't challenge me. You were just like, Hey, why don't you wear your cock ring in the hot tub? Well, yeah, I was like, have you ever thought about where, like, would you wear it to the RM jacuzzi, which is different than the pearl jacuzzi? Yeah, I guess so.

It's so it's a little more ballsy, forgive the pun. So our listener understands there's this cock ring. It is a surgical stainless steel cock ring that our friend got and said, Hey, Richard, this is too small for me. I think it would look great on you.

You know, at first I was like, fuck you, and if it looks good, then yes, I will have it. I put it on and gosh darn it, yes, it fits. In fact, it fits quite perfectly. It was like a little Cinderella slipper.

Yeah, getting it on, it's a little like making a balloon animal out of your genitalia. So you have to, you have to sort of manipulate your testicles through this little hole and well, before all of this, you have to oil yourself down like Turkish wrestling. In fact, the first time that I used it for the workshop, I pulled my shorts down to my knees, so my shirt was still on, my shoes were still on, my shorts were down to my knees, and I started to lube myself up. I'm all alone in the disco, right?

And usually you're the only person that walks in, and here I am lubing up my cock with the oil, and the cleaning woman walks in and just looks at me. I had nothing to say except Comota. And she walked and went the other way. She just left in any other building, you would have been arrested, arrested immediately.

We would have heard sirens literally 60 seconds afterward. So I'm at the, uh, I'm at the hot tub and I'm oiling up and I put my cock ring on. We go into the jacuzzi. Now the jacuzzi at RM.

I'm not a huge fan of that hot tub because. Gets super full, right? It is not big. It just gets very difficult to sort of move around.

You just sort of find a place and then you're, you're kind of stuck there. Yeah, you're stuck. So you better hope that you chose good people to sit next to, or it's really awkward getting out of that situation, right? Well, we went over to our people that we had the have the sex date with later.

We sat with them for a while. It was just a lot. I was just like. I got to get out of here.

Claustrophobic, sort of ADD, claustrophobic. Like I, I sort of want to talk to other people and I can't. And so we get out with your junk jewelry on. I love that name.

You do. Yeah, that's what I call it in my head. Why did you never say that out loud? Because stuff sometimes is just better left in my head.

I need to trademark this immediately. Junk jewelry. Oh my God, I can't believe you like it so much. Oh my God, that's awesome.

Junk jewelry is on and we're standing there, we're talking. A guy gets out of the hot tub and he starts walking over right over to us. Now this is one of our affiliates that booked through us, right? So we already sort of know him.

I'm already nervous because I feel like his wife hates me. Yeah, right, you know why, right? Yeah, I put my foot in my mouth a lot, and you rarely do. So I was laughing at you at the same time.

I mean, it was such a great choice of words. I'm a moron. Yeah, out of all the things, I mean, they're just gorgeous people. Again, another example of a couple that I see like when they're like, hey, we're, we're your affiliates, and I'm like.

Awesome inside voice. I want to have sex with you people. I want to have sex with both of you right now. Uh, I talked to her and she's like, we actually met you guys before and I was like, yes, I remember.

I remember your tattoo and I remember your beautiful breasts. And she says, no, the breasts were not here the last time I was here. And I'm like fuck. Oh God, you cannot talk your way out of that one, right?

Really went strong on a strong choice in, in my defense, they're fantastic. Yeah, they were beautiful. They're beautiful, but at that point I'm dead to her. I am just your breast premonition does not amuse me.

She let me off the hook. A little bit and she's like, maybe it was my nipples that you remember. I'm like, yes, I remember your nipples. That's what I remember.

Uh, so anyway, he comes over and he's like, hey, I gotta ask you, what, what, what is up with your junk jewelry? He didn't say that, but he should have. I was like, it's a cock ring. I like to tell people it's surgical stainless steel.

Yeah, I don't really know anything about it. Hell, it's not even mine, to be honest. Any body piercing or anything like that is made of surgical steel. Well, so is my junk junk jewelry.

So he says, What does it feel like? And I, because I'm a little drunk, why don't you try it on, and my wife will help you. And all I can think about is the puzzle of pushing his junk, making his junk into a balloon animal. Yeah, so, so I take it off here, honey, show him how to put the cock ring on.

Now I'm sexually benefiting from this a little bit. Right, and we're both there. You're sexually benefiting from this because we're both sort of greasing up our cocks. So basically we're sitting there rubbing oil on our cocks for you, and you're just like, I know.

I immediately get down on my knees and I'm like, Let me help you put it on. So then he puts it on. He's like, Is this it? I'm like, Well, you gotta get hard, and that's what feels better.

Boom, I'm already in. Get this gentleman hard. I am in it already, for we are guests here. It is our duty to go down on every single person here.

Start with this gentleman and show him how the cock ring works. So, uh, he went over, he showed his wife a little bit who still hates me, and we just start talking to him and we're laughing and joking, and then it gets flirty, and we make this joke. Well, we're just, we'll steal you and bring you back to the room. He's like, OK, let's go.

Yeah, I did not flinch at all, so I'm like, oh wait. Can you? Yeah, I can go. Or we're like, wait, wait, wait, because she's, she hasn't been over here really.

I mean, she came over, she stopped by, talked for a little bit, but it's like, no, no, no, it's, it's cool. This, this is how we do it, and it's fine. I wanna do this. This sounds fun.

So he ran back and he asked her, but he's letting her know like as if I would come to you in a store and be like, I'm gonna be in electronics, yeah, or like I'm gonna run back to the room for a second. Like, I don't know. There was a tiny piece of me that was like, oh, she was not happy, but he was. Like, yeah, she's cool.

She said, have fun. I'm like, oh, this is great. All right, you belong to us now. And I was like, let's fucking go because, well, we can't go yet because we have, we already have an appointment for sex.

That's right. So you have to go back and tell the other people, hi guys, listen, we know we have this thing, um, we need to go molest this guy really quickly. Yeah, they're like, amazing, we'll see you at dinner. We haven't had a threesome in forever forever.

Because we live in couples land and it is something that we haven't done in, I, I mean, years, years, right? This is, I mean, it's probably one of my favorite things. There's just something about it just being three people and I got really excited to just kind of go down that path again. Yeah, you were super excited.

I like it because I get to I get to just focus a little bit more. I always said this, one of the things for me is there's a lot less anxiety in it because I'm essentially. Pleasing you. So, uh, we go back to the room, we do stuff.

There's at one point where I'm fucking you, and then he tries to put his penis in your vagina, like D DVPVP, right? And I could see you're facing me and you're like, Oh, and I'm looking at you like, take it. Come on come on. And he's like, Is everything OK?

I'm like, Put it in. Put it in. You're like, No, no, no. I'm like, come on, you could do it.

Concentrate. Use the force, honey. But uh you have a tiny vagina. I know we gotta stretch that thing out.

Yeah, we gotta stretch it out. Yeah, you got a tiny vagina, so it's hard to get two cocks in there, but these are things that we need to work on constantly. But he was very professional. He was very, very respectful.

He was so much fun. I know he really was good. I thought he was excellent. He also spills liquid.

A lot. That's the other thing we found out about him. Alright, so let's move on to situation number 2 because I'm gonna ask you, out of the three, snapshots that we did, which one you like the best. So we go out to the dinner, we have the dinner with the friends, right, right.

So we finish dinner, we go over to what's the melange, it looks smoking hot, heads turning, guys and gals drooling everywhere, all over. Floor they needed drains. Yeah, that's always my least favorite part, the show. It's really the only time where you are forced to not socialize, and I find it ironic that put this entertainment in front of you and I am the least bit entertained because I get my entertainment from talking with the people, flirting with the people, going down on the people.

That's where I find my pleasure, right? I guess it's a good break for people though. I would prefer it to be like a New York lounge or something where it's just like there's just DJ and there's just a bunch of sofas and you can like it's in a party, but you can still talk to people, right? This is just my opinion, by the way, when I opened my resort.

It's gonna have the cushions by the pool. We're gonna have entertainment in the background. That's what we're gonna call it and free junk jewelry. So all you wanna do this night is dance.

I wanna get my dance on, get a little like slutty on the dance floor, and then go back for some more sex, right? They had a different plan. They just, uh, yeah, show is great. Let's fuck.

So we go up there and we start. They lay us down. They're both like, we love to be givers. We want to be givers and you guys are gonna be the receivers.

Now for me, my, I'm instantly like, oh, this isn't gonna work. Always makes me nervous being put in the middle or as a receiver in a group situation. But I gave in. I really, really, really enjoyed it, right?

So it's just lying there being taken. Care of, right? He's taking care of you, she's taking care of me. Now this is where it takes an awkward turn for Richard.

I'm lying straight down, he's going down on you. I am essentially getting oral. And as she's blowing me, boom, she sticks a finger in my ass. I'm like, oh well, this is different.

So now she's blowing me, but it was starting to hurt a little bit, right? And you know those scenes in the movie where like The person is like hurting the person and then the person is just an inch away from the gun or the knife and they're trying to reach for it. That's, that was me with the lube, right? And then you would get the gun and the gun was empty.

That's what happened, fucking completely empty. I brought the wrong 10, and I'm giving like zero shits because he's going down on me. And I'm just like having such a good time with that. I came first.

You did, yeah, like a Guinness Book. So that's situation too. So here we are in an actual foursome. So we have the guy, right, threesome, male, female, male.

Now we have a foursome where we're both sort of being taken care of. Now the next day we're looking for someone to have sex with. So we started talking to the couple that we had just been with the night before that was finger banging me, and I go down to her and I'm like, I'm a little bit mad at you, and she's like, what are you mad at me for? I'm like, I'm gonna tell you, my asshole kind of hurts.

I'm having a little pain in my asshole. She's like, God, I'm so sorry. I didn't know, but it was super hot on a whim. I was like, We did bring a strap on.

Let me just, well, I'm afraid of her reaction, right? I'll stick a finger in your butt, but I, I don't wanna strap it on and fuck the shit out of you. Well, it's an advanced toy for someone that you don't really know if that's the play they're into. I lob it out to her.

I was like, look, I have a strap-on. I haven't had anyone peg me with this strap on, but it was Bob and Nicky from Ar Naughty Escapades bought it for me, us, probably more for me. I said if you want you can peg me tonight because I'm feeling sassy. I'm feeling sassy.

She'd never done that before. No, she had never done it before. We go back to the room, we start fooling around with them again. She straps it on.

I get the lube this time before we start. She starts to peg me. We're watching. You two are watching and like whispering stuff to each other now.

The thing that turned me on. The most was the three of you. Number 1, 1st and foremost, her, when she started to peg me. The look that came over her face, it was amazing.

Like she really embodied. It was like she assumed it. Her whole body started to feel it and then she's so fucking hot. She started to really, really fuck me, and then her hand slipped underneath that strap on and you're coming.

I don't know how you were coming. I just know you were coming. She's coming while she's pegging me. She was, she was so super turned on, and he's whispering to me like she's, she just had, she's still having an orgasm.

She's still coming. Now. How was it for you? There's just something about the beauty of the people switching.

I don't know how to describe it. It's so fucking hot though. He was turned on by how turned on she. Yeah, well, just the whole both of it as she's assuming that role, you're sort of assuming this other body position and it gets really sexy too.

I don't know what it feels like to have an epileptic seizure because I do not have epilepsy. However, if you want to come in the vein of having an epileptic seizure, I would encourage you to try this because coming while that's. It's Happening. It's like it's a very, very powerful orgasm.

It really, really is. All right, so you have that. You have the other one where we're just sort of foursome as receivers and then you have the threesome my boy toy. What did you like the best?

It's got to be a hard choice. It really is quite the choice there, Richard. You're welcome, because there's, I think what impacts me most is I'm probably a visual. Person, because that's what stuck with me the longest.

So even though the other ones were like super pleasurable and stuff, the stuff I remember is visual. That's why I love, I really enjoy the lifestyle because I'm such a visual person. I love to look at all the things. For me, it was the last one.

The way the lights were and like just the energy and lighting designed by Lauren. Lauren has this habit of going into rooms and putting clothing over certain lights, filtering them. We woke up the next day, bing, we're at work. Yeah, so 48 hours.

Will we do it again? Will you do it again? I actually really enjoyed it. I can't wait to do it again.

All right, so tell our listener to, uh, come, come on us. Well, the next one we're gonna do, I think, maybe, well, maybe. My, my birthday, which will be the beginning of March. I like it.

I think we should do it every month. All right, you heard it, y'all. Come down and give me a birthday present. Just remember it's not very easy to import a car here, so you're gonna want to research that.

And the Tesla truck just came out. Yeah, but I don't think that's gonna be ready in time for my birthday. You wanna bring me presents? Yeah, little trinkets or a boat, a boat.

What room are you in? 2301. What room are you in? What is in your mouth, lady?

What room are you in? 2111. What room are you in? 51 with what room are you in?

10:16. Will you hold this for me? That is my cock ring. It just came off my cock.

Everybody else wants to touch it. Don't sniff it, no. If you know what this is, raise your hand. You don't know what it is.

Do you want to hold it? Do you want to touch it? Good choice. Now you have to put this on, not now, but if you had to put this on, how would you do it?

Put it right over the top and slide it down and then try to tuck everything in there. If you had to put this on, how would you do it? That's a really good question. I wouldn't put it on you, period.

Not me. Put it on you. If you had to put it on yourself, I would guess I would have to be completely soft, otherwise that thing's not going on. What about your testicles?

Do you know how to put this on? That'd be tough. Do you know how to put one of these on? Not one like that.

I've used different ones. I would assume you'd have to work one at a time through one at a time is really good advice. So how would you do it? I don't think I could.

Has any lady here? Ever used a strap-on? Raise your hand. Absolutely.

Have you ever used a strap-on on a man? Yeah, my husband. Have you ever used a strap-on on a man? Yes, my husband.

Have you used a strap-on? I did once a long time ago. Was it on this gentleman? No, no, this guy, my own guy.

Have you ever used a strap-on on a man? That would make no sense. Have you ever used a strap-on on a man? No.

Would you ever? Maybe. Would you be willing to take a strap-on from your wife if she wants to do it? Probably not.

Did you come while you were fucking him? I got really, really wet. Have you ever used a strap-on? No.

Have you ever had a, have you ever had a strap-on used on you? I have not. Would you be open to it if she really wanted it? Absolutely not.

Have you ever had a strap-on used on you? Whoa, I'm not gonna answer that. Oh All right, Lauren, here we are. I'm here.

I have a clever little thing that I wanna introduce to me, sort of. I mean, this is how I'm gonna introduce it. I'm gonna sort of mask a promotion into a segment. Watch how clever I am.

So what are you addicted to this month? I can't stop drinking this grapefruit water that I'm making. I can't drink regular water this month. It's all.

Has to have grapefruit in it. That's really strange. I know it is. But speaking of addiction, tell them all about bikini Addiction.

All right, if you want to get addicted, Bikini Addiction, you can get a free bikini if you book 5 nights or more with us by clicking on my box. And if you are not one of the 1st 5 for the month, then you can get 20% off any bikini at bikiniaddiction.com. With the promo code room 77. All right, so go check that out.

They have some really kickass stuff. We've already seen people showing up in these bikinis, and they look super hot. Now. Here are things that I'm addicted to.

Number one, the marvelous Miss Maisel. So good. Oh my God, I love that show. It just makes me so happy.

I can't wait to finish this so we can go watch more episodes. I know. I am so addicted to that, but I am also. addicted to, especially this month, and I don't know why I am addicted to the playmaker B.

You know, there's certain people that you meet in life. I don't know how you feel about her. I feel like I have a separate relationship with her. It's special.

I have a separate one. We talk about you, uh, but she's one of those people that I want to know for the rest of my life, but I don't think that that's going to be possible. She's gonna have to move on at some point. So like everybody knows that desire, the playmakers like leave at around 4 and then they come back at like 9.

So we were able to squeeze this in and talk to her a little bit, and she is so sweet, and she's so sexy, and she is so smart, and I want to encourage everyone to get to know my other. Wife, if you cannot smile while you're listening to B Bravo, because to me it's impossible, yeah, and try to find some photos of her, and I hope she opens her Instagram because she is so stunningly gorgeous. I just want, I wanna share with the world, really radiates. All right, so here we are sitting down with Bee.

Enjoy. I brought somebody who knows me better than they know you. No, they know me. Wait, they know me better than you know me.

Yes, yes, because it is true love between this, this gal and I. So nice of you to say true love. OK, it's pretty true. She loves me for who I am.

So her name is Bee and she is one of the playmakers who works over at Desire Riviera Maya. First, say hello, Bee. Hi Richard. Hi.

Of course I love you more than Lauren does. I love you for who you are, I know for sure. I know. By the way, since we weren't there this week, did you miss it?

Did you miss us? Of course, that's why I'm here. I know I can't live a week without you. It's hard for everyone, B.

So how long have you been over at Josiah Riviera Maya doing the uh the whole playmaker thing? 6 months already. 6 months. Important question because we were talking about flirting.

Do you remember when we first met? Yes, you were so shy. Oh my God. That's not true.

I was not shy. I was flirting with you. You don't have to lie. I was pretty shy.

You were shy. actually approached you, you and I said, Are you ever going to say hello to me? You scared me. I do remember that you did say that, and you were like, Oh yes, hello.

Well, you're very intimidating. It was a little scary because you're, you're very strikingly beautiful, and it was very difficult for me to gather all of my thoughts and not get an erection like you're doing now. One of the things that I remember that you said to me was, Hey, Richard, I like looking at you naked. So do you still, after 6 months, do you still enjoy seeing me naked?

Of course I do. That's why every time you introduce the men's workshop, I pull your pants. So that's why, so B does this thing when we do the, the Lingham workshop. B thought it would be fun to get me naked while we do that announcement, and then she said, Richard, get hard, go.

And I had to explain to her that it doesn't actually work like that. Yeah, that's the challenge so far. So Lauren has a few questions for you that she wants to ask for you, and then I'm gonna come in a few times with my own questions. You're a pretty confident woman.

I have problems with self-confidence, how you felt with being in a bathing suit day one on the job versus like how do you feel now? I think I'm more confident now, the guests, they help you a lot. Every day, they are always giving you compliments and they're telling you, oh my God, you are so beautiful, and I've learned to love myself and my body by being there cause you see a lot and you learn. You love yourself and you understand that your body is always different from other bodies and you embrace yourself.

I think that's so important and that's kind of why I wanted to ask you that because like as a woman, it really helps hearing that. Did you not like your body before you started working here? Did you have doubts about your body? Right now with the social media that lies a lot.

Uh, sometimes you struggle with your body and you don't feel that confident because you see some things on social media that make you feel like you're. Not pretty enough, but by being there you understand so, so many things by seeing naked people, all of the different sizes, shapes, body types, everything. It all sort of puts everything into perspective, right? Exactly.

I think that you are beautiful and that should be enough. I love you and that's really all that matters. That's all that matters. I agree.

Where are you from originally? I'm Mexican. I was born in the state that it's the name is Tamaulipas. Do you miss anything from there?

No. I mean, of course, I have my family there. I miss them, but it's a small city and they're like conservative. Do you even see the naked people anymore?

Like, was it shocking at first? You know what, before coming here, I have to tell you, I took a class where I used to do sketches of naked people. People you did like the first impression for me wasn't like shocking. It was actually OK, they're naked, but obviously interacting because I used to do sketches but not interacting with naked people, right?

Have you ever sketched me? Oh God, every day, every minute I would like to see those sketches. Will you please make me have a really big penis. In those sketches now, most people probably assume you are a young naive girl that is running around a pool feeding people shots, but you, which I find is very impressive, what did you go to school for?

I graduated as a chemical engineer, a chemical motherfucking engineer. Amazing. That is so much more knowledge than I have in this brain. I don't know anything about chemicals or engineering them.

That is true. When I first met you, one of the things that I thought was amazing about you was you immediately grasped the sexuality of the resort. You just sort of flowed with it, like it was part of you. You understood it.

It didn't freak you out. Do you consider yourself a sexual being in life? Definitely I do. I can tell you that in my social group before they used to think I was like, I, I don't know, the way I dressed up, the way I talked, the way I approached two people, they were like, You are too like sexual or not with those words, you know what I mean.

So I. I used to think that I was doing something wrong, and when I got here, I realized that I actually fit here because it's the kind of life I like. I feel comfy. The people that's around me, they make me feel that.

Would you go to the resort? Would you stay there ever? For sure, I would definitely come back as a guest. You would.

I would. Would you take our workshop as a guest? 100%, yes. B is gonna help us with the workshop.

We just can't have B help us with the workshop and work at desire at the same time. Would you be OK rubbing people? Yeah, she'd do great. I think you should go in tomorrow, quit.

I was thinking, and then, you know what, I quit. All right, hold on, officially I quit. Wait, wait, we should talk about this first. We should talk about how this, how this actually affects everything.

We don't have a human resources department. This is our headquarters right here, so I want you to take a look at what you're getting yourself into. Oh God. So going along the same lines like confidence and stuff, I mean, you don't need makeup, but do you feel more confident going out and doing stuff without makeup now as opposed to before or were you always kind of natural?

You know, I've been working with that before coming here. I've been working on embracing myself, who I am with all this social media, you get to that point where Where you feel you're not pretty enough, you don't have the perfect body, and I was like, fuck that. I really wanna embrace myself, like myself. I wanna like who I'm looking at in the mirror.

So I've been working with that before getting here, and I think like by being here it was, this was a big challenge for me and it helped me a lot to improve myself. That's awesome. Now going back to your body. What is the thing that most people compliment you on?

You know where I'm going here. What is the thing that most people talk about? Of course they talk about my eyes. Well, of course they talk about your eyes, blue eyes.

No, my butt, your butt, your butt is like something that I personally have never seen before in my entire life, and it is magical, mesmerizing. I still cannot stop staring at you and your butt. Did you always have that butt? Yes, but I didn't realize before how good it is.

No, seriously, like going back to the social media thing, you see so many photos, angles from people, and they had like this amazing butt, and then by being here I realized like, OK, I accept it. I have a nice butt. Are you on social media? Do you have an Instagram page?

Yes, I do. Do you show your butt on Instagram? I've been working on that. I have to tell you this.

Sometimes I post things showing my butt, but then I start getting a lot of comments about, you know, how people might work. They are like, when they're close to you, they feel like, why are you doing that? But then they just like other people showing their butts because they know you, they want to judge you. Exactly.

But then, and I'm working on that because when they start doing a lot of comments, I just delete the photo, and I don't wanna do that. I'm Man, don't need to delete it. Fuck them. Are you on Twitter?

I am on Twitter as well. Do you want anyone to know your Instagram handle, or is it private? It's private. Um, I wanna make it public because so far by working at Desire I've been getting a lot of follow requests.

Yes. Do you want us to tell what your Instagram is? You could leave it private, but do you, what is it? Ms_ B E R N A.

LD. Maybe I'll have to listen to that a couple of times and write it down somewhere. Yeah, it's not easy. It's not, it has nothing to do with B.

That's all right. They'll get it. Are you on Twitter also? Yes, but I don't remember my username.

No, it's because Twitter for me, it's more like, uh, I talk about how I feel during the day. It's nothing like special. You have good friends at the resort that you have. Hang out with and live with, right?

Who would you say your closest friend at the resort is there right now? For sure it's Pao. Pow. I've heard of her also strikingly good looking, but she has a boyfriend, so I try not to talk to her because I don't want to be disrespectful.

When I picture you guys going back to that little house that you all live in, it's been a long day, so you go back there and you're like, oh, I can bear. Barely scrub my back. Hey pal, can you come over here and wash me, and then you guys scrub each other up. Does that happen a lot?

Unfortunately, no, because we have separate rooms, but if not, we would definitely do it. Did you ever accidentally kiss pal? Oops, I'm drunk and I kissed her sorry. What do you want me to say?

I want you to say, yeah, we made out. Yeah, we made out. Yes. So, and this may be too personal, have you ever been with a woman or have you ever been interested in the bisexuality of yourself?

I've been with a woman before, yes. Oh God. That is also something at the resort that didn't throw you at all. Yeah, it was something that I just wanted to do and I did and that's why I feel I fit there perfectly.

So many things going on in my mind. I, I've been talking to you that I'm interested in doing that maybe some other people wouldn't understand. When I talk with my friends that are not there about what I live, they think I'm crazy or they think there's something wrong going on. I don't think you're crazy.

Now, not to put you on the spot, but who do you like better, me or Lauren? Do I have to pick one? Only one? You don't have to.

OK, I would definitely say you, Richard. I told you she does love you. She understands. I do love you.

She understands me. I can be a playmaker. Do you want me to go to work tonight and you can stay here with Richard? That would be awesome.

He needs bath time at 9:30. Do I have to feed him? Yes, no, then no, I'd rather go back to work then. But being there at the resort in this amount of time, is there anything that sort of changed your view of relationships, just being introduced to just this world, which I, I imagine this, this entire world of swingers and lifestyle is all new to you.

Yes, I still go back to whom I was in my past relationships and I think about myself like, oh my God, I was so immature talking about relationships. I used to think that people Belong to you and it doesn't. It's a choice, right? They want to be there.

They're going to be there. I don't know. I feel way more confident. I don't feel like I'm jealous anymore.

Jealousy is an evil cancer that will erode a relationship so quickly. Sometimes the things that we have wrapped around jealousy are just silly, and they will destroy everything from within. So I'm glad to hear you say that. I remember in my past relationship.

My men like to go to strip clubs. I felt so offended, right? Why am I not enough? Exactly.

And, and now I would definitely go with him or if he wants to go, he can go. I would even bring him here to desire as well. I feel so confident. I don't feel like jealousy.

It's a good thing. I don't know. You just learn to love yourself while you are there. Do you think that Lauren is beautiful?

Like when you You saw her, were you like, Oh, that is a really beautiful old woman. I don't think she looks old at all. She is just gorgeous. Her smile, her eyes, and she has these beautiful features that make, I don't know, she's just gorgeous.

Oh, that's so sweet. She's, she's, I have to be honest, she's beautiful. Do you think that you're gonna stay much longer because if you leave, I'm quitting. Yeah, well, of course I have plans.

I am enjoying my time there and I think desire offers you a lot of opportunities. It opens you a lot of doors. I'm still enjoying my time there, so I'm gonna stay there for a while still. Yeah.

So don't quit. Definitely. When you eventually wanna get out of Mexico and you wanna start your career, is there any place that you wanna go and start your chemical engineering, whatever that means? Where Canada?

You wanna go to Canada. Yeah, that's a good move. I mean, it's cold. It is cold, but right now they're offering a lot of opportunities.

I just wanna be in a first world country and start. If anybody out there is in Canada and works in the Field of chemical engineering and wants a very hot, young, smart woman working with them with the ass of a goddess. In fact, you could set your coffee on her ass while she's standing up. You could use her as a table while she's running experiments or whatever.

I don't really know what chemical engineers do. While you're engineering chemicals, use that butt for a side table. So if anybody has any interest in that or anybody has any opportunity for B here, please reach out so we can put you all together. Alright, thank you so much, Bee.

I have to get you showered up and get you back to the resort so you can go take care of all the people. You're really good at that and we're just glad we got to kidnap you for a little bit. Oh, thank you. Thank you for having me.

I love hanging out with you, and we're gonna see you Sunday. We'll come pick you up again for the bee party. You're all invited. If you're single and you're OK with being naked, you're welcome.

Hopefully this Sunday we're gonna have a party for B. Uh, I haven't invited anybody except for B. That's why it's this party and maybe pal can come. Maybe pal, you know, you said semi single people coming.

Yeah, these are the rules. So you can come if you're single and you're OK with being naked. That's it. Those are the rules.

Yeah, that's it. All right, B, thank you so much. Thank you, Richard. I love you, B.

I love you more and I'm so happy I'm gonna see you next week. Sure, Sandra, yay. Has anybody here met the playmaker B? Do you know the playmaker I'm talking about?

What is the first thing you think about when you picture Bee in your mind? She's hot. Does anybody else know the girl with the great ass, with the great ass? You know who I'm talking about?

I do. What if there was one thing on her body? It's her ass, her ass, right. It's, it's amazing.

It's like from out of this world, right? It really is. Yes, she's thinking right now about whether she should make her Instagram public so everybody can. See those amazing pictures.

Private or open that up. Share this with the world. Share it. Should she share her beautiful assets with everyone?

I want to see them. It's very selfish of you. Thank you. Do you think Bea should open it up so everybody can see how beautiful she is?

And I'm interested in finding her. OK, I will be, we will be announcing her Instagram on this, this episode. Would you like to see Bea's Instagram? Thank you guys so much.

Thank you so much. Lauren, we started. Can I will wait if you can do your fancy lighting. While you're doing that, I'll throw my gum out and making another marble because there's one still there from the last time we recorded.

You should get a little bag and have a little Richard's gum marble. So here we are. First, we wanna say thank you so much to. All the people out there who booked during the secret cyber sale event, it was great.

I mean it was a lot, so thank you for that. It was a huge outpouring of love and support. You gave us not only 10% but more points so that we can stay at the hotel and possibly go down on you now. You never know.

You don't know. You don't know when we're gonna be there. I have to do like a shout out sort of thing because we ran into a couple who was our listener apparently and she was like, What are you gonna talk about me? So I have to talk about her for a second.

So this is the hot tattooed girl from California and her crazy. Crazy Canadian friends. Crazy Canadian friends. Did I get that correct?

Yes, that is right. First of all, when I was doing the announcement, uh, I lost my, my train of thought because she's so hot. Well, yeah, but not only that, that's the second part. The first part is, is when I was doing the announcement, she started holding up Nicorette and shaking it on me, I'm.

And I'm like, Oh, this girl speaks my language. I like stopped. I quit the announcement, went over there. I was like, Give me a piece of gum.

So then we get in the pool. She starts talking about that like, Hey, why don't you talk about me? I'm like, I don't know. What do you want me to say?

So I'm saying it right now. This is it. Here's the second weird thing about this. It's a girl like that that I look at and I still think, how could you possibly want to have sex with me?

Isn't that weird? Like, I still have that. High school mind that when, when I see a hot girl, she, she makes any sort of innuendo directed at me. I'm like, come on, you're, you're kidding, right?

Isn't that weird? No, and I'll tell you why, because the first time I met you, you came to the workshop. I was really intimidated, and I thought you were like mean. Oh well, that must have went over well and she was like, oh my God, I wanted you.

To be a cunt too, and then we hugged and made out. Girls are so strange, man. I know it's weird. Like we want you to be mean if you're pretty.

I, if, if a guy sees another guy who's like a handsome, rugged guy, we don't immediately go, that guy's a fucking douchebag. What we do is we're like, I wanna be that guy's best friend. He represents me. He gets me.

And then I have another shout out to, there was a couple from Minnesota that gave us Nicorette and then we thanked them on the podcast, but we thanked the wrong couple so I apologize for that, um, for punishment they did not bring us Nicorette this time so that sucks for us, but she drives 1000 miles a week, so I hope she's listening to this now. Sorry we screwed it up last time, but you're welcome. Here it is now. So it was kind of a crazy week.

I wanna start off with the workshopy thing. It made me so happy on so many levels. Go ahead. So in the last episode, if our listener remembers, we talked about the one guy who walked in and he was wearing black socks and he never took his black socks off.

So we go into the workshop, kind of busy, and I start handing out the oil as I usually do. I'm sort of crossing around one corner and I see a guy lying down and he Wearing just black socks. I'm like, Oh my God, I'm so embarrassed. I just sort of made fun of this, and now someone's doing it.

I hope he doesn't listen. And then I turn another corner and there's another guy wearing black socks. I saw both of them too, but they didn't have them on at the same time as like people were getting undressed or something. I started freaking out.

I go to a third person and I'm handing out the oil. I look down and the black socks are on a third person, and then it hit me. And I turned like bright red. 6 people were wearing black socks.

It was just such amazing planning. So thank you for doing that, lady. You know who you are. So to get back on track here.

In the last segment, I gave you 3 choices as far as sexual situation. Here. I want to preface this just a little bit. A little while ago there were some people online that were sort of attacking.

Yeah, well, someone misinterpreted something, yeah, and they wrote something and And basically called us dirty whores. But luckily a Patreon messaged us and told us that everything was going down. Yeah, he let us know. We had no idea that this was happening in the series of tubes called the internet.

So we went and looked and we were like, holy crap, this person's mean and hateful. And then luckily on top of that, like so many people came to our defense, like they just shut this person down. It almost made me cry. I think I maybe did cry.

I did. I was so sweet like to know that that many people were like, Hey, back the fuck off, man. Like I just got chills right now. It was after the rule change of the resort and they were like, You dirty whores, you prey on the guests, which is not fair because to be fair, we prey on everyone.

We are equal opportunity hunters. We don't discriminate. No. And why would we?

We'd be at the store. Or you could be at the resort. You could be in your car. You're all vulnerable to my penis.

They said a lot of hateful things, one of which were, I can't believe 3 couples in one week, and that made us sit back and reflect a little bit, you know, we talked about it and we said, you know what, Lauren, we can do better than that. We can do better than this. So we had 6 in one week. We wanna go through some of these for you because I have some choices for you.

So the odd thing that's been happening now is sometimes we get texts or messages from people who used to stay at Desire and they're like, hey, we're gonna be staying at a hotel, would you like to meet us down there for dinner? And I thought, what hotel? And they're staying at this super awesome sweet ass hotel. Oh my God, so nice, and I was like.

Yeah, I would love to see that place. Are you paying? Yes, of course we're paying. Then we will go.

So I put on my my Sunday best or my Monday best. So we headed down to this hotel, almost couldn't get on cause it was like Fort Knox. Now I gotta be honest, you remembered exactly what they look like, and before we went down there, I'm like, I really don't even know if they're in the lifestyle. I really don't know because there's No hints.

Nothing. They're not. They're not giving any hints. They're not like, bring your lube or whatever you would say, you know what I mean?

But that didn't put us past his pre-shaving and, well, you have to be ready. Yeah, you gotta be ready. Always gotta be sex ready in this world. I actually put on sexy pants rather than your granny panties that you usually wear around the house, which are so gross.

I don't wear granny panties so. Makeup you do, and there's a big stain on the back. Oh my God, I threw away one of your underwears. I didn't tell you.

I forgot which one. Not the holy ones. Yeah, I did honey. They're my holy underwear.

We could have used them for something. No, we don't need any more cloths. We have enough. So we go down there.

I have you describe them to me. You gave me like if someone had just robbed you tall, uh, white, uh. Wearing a hoodie, wearing a hoodie, uh, so I was sort of walking into it a little bit blind. I again, I didn't know.

Did you know if they were gonna wanna do stuff? I didn't really know, but I was like kind of wanting it to happen just because I wanted an experience at a vanilla hotel. It seems taboo that I wanted to do it. So when we get there, we realize that they are there.

A big group of people that they fucking work with. So they're like, oh, by the way, uh, we're with a bunch of people that we work with, so you need a backstory. I'm like, What? Alright, well, I'll come over the back.

How's this? I start pitching out backstories and they're like, no, don't worry about it, we'll be OK. I'm like, now all I'm thinking about is a backstory. We don't need one for how we know you.

We already told some people that we met you on vacation, but you need a backstory for what you do down here. I go past that. It's like, you don't need a backstory for how we met you, but I'm like, well, you kind of do because saying to somebody, uh, this is Richard and Lauren. We met them while on vacation last time.

OK, how? Where. Live here? Where were you that you met?

Like, these are all possible questions that can that they could float to you that I am not prepared for, and I am not a good liar. So I have to prepare something in my head. I was coming up with nothing. So a group of people come over to us and they're like, these people are cool.

I'm like, oh, so they know and they're like, no, they don't know, they suspect, right? They suspect. I'm still playing it like I'm, I'm a missionary down here, so they come up and you can sort of see that look that people are like, this is Richard and Laurie and our friends down in Mexico, and people sort of look at you like, OK, friends in Mexico. He's in Mexico.

Why have you never spoken of these friends before? and they give you, they just stare at you like, give me something, and I just smile like, so nice to meet you. Yeah, so anyway, we ended up in bed with them. So the thing is, is like I really like this new trend that's happening because I love hotels.

It is a beautiful hotel. Yeah, I like to get out more. Yeah, and like there's something about hotel rooms that just turn me on, right? They turn me on, right?

As soon as you walk into a hotel, you, you're like, I just, I wanna have sex. Let's just have sex. I didn't know that you had that because I was feeling that. I'm like starting to question myself.

Like, as a human, no, I mean, I know I'm a human, but like, is it taboo that that's why I'm loving it? Is that what it is? I don't know what it is about hotels. I think hotels are sexy.

I, I really don't know why. And the last thing I'll say before we move on is that was a hookup where I have never done less work in my life, so much that the next day I apologized to her. I was like, I just did nothing at all. She's like, it's fine.

It was great, great for me. Next time I'll pay her back if they get that same room. So then we get another call, not a call, but they're like, hey guys, uh, we're gonna be at this other place. You guys wanna come and hang out for a while.

Now we know these people wanna have sex with us. They weren't as as coy as the other as the other guys. So we're like, uh, of course we ask the question anybody would ask, which hotel? I went to Google.

5 star. Does it have a diamond rating? This place was ridiculous. They were like, oh, hello, this place is great.

Sold. Let's all have sex. Now I do remember this one was like a little bit weird. I didn't really know that they weren't that far into the lifestyle, and I would say this is one of my pet peeves about newer lifestyle people, right?

It's putting on sort of a bravado or putting on sort of a fake it till you make it sort of vibe when that is probably the worst. Thing you could do, I mean, I'm, I'm very into fake it till you make it and confidence and all that stuff, confidence being sexy, but you get points for being humble in this area. So the problem with it is the disposition changes, right? So you're playing confident and then you start doing stuff, but then their boundaries are sort of not negotiated or communicated or they're saying like they're telling you nonverbally before.

We're wild. We're crazy. But then when it actually starts to happen, we can, I think anybody can tell sort of that fear or yeah, you just sense the energy change. And then afterwards, so she got very sort of weird afterwards, and I sort of picked up on this, yeah, I picked up on this vibe.

It's not because I, I like stood up and was like, hey lady, you like pee pee? I started peeing on her. I, I haven't, I haven't done yet. He's like walks us down, you know, we say goodbye and he like rides down with us on the, the elevator afterwards, and I'm like, is everything OK?

Is she OK? He's like, Yeah, yeah, yeah, she's fine, she's fine. We just broke a lot of boundaries up there. I'm like, Wait, wait, don't say that now.

She'll be fine. No, no, no, she'll be fine. She'll be fine. She, she's gonna be great.

So if you are somebody out there who is sort of newer to this or is just stepping in, my advice, and this is just my advice. Uh, you know, this doesn't go for everybody. Let people know that you're not that experienced. Let people know that you're still questioning your, your limits.

That's the first time we've done that or we've never done that before, but we want to do that or we're open to that, or we're gonna hold back a little bit on that. It will help you and this is a very helpful community, even when it comes to just being. There in that present moment, people want the other couple almost to have a better time than yourself. It's like you want to please them almost more than you want to please yourself.

We're just so trained to be like, yeah, I'm, I mean, I know I used to do that modeling. They'd be like, Hey, can you horseback ride? Absolutely. Do you ski?

You not ski here. My horse pulled me here on my skis. my skis. Yeah, don't show weakness.

I've had conversations where I was staring people in the face. There could be 1015 minutes, or even all day, and my brain's going, these two are such dirty whores. And then in an instant they're like, Well, we've only really played once, and you're like, What? Oh my God, I thought, OK, my brain was saying you sounded kinky as fuck.

Well, that kind of happened with the third couple. I misjudged them. OK, so the third couple, so there we meet this couple in the pool and we were with like foursome in the pool, 6 of us. So there's 1 couple, them and us, and they were all coming to the workshop, right?

So the workshop's happening again, we're setting up, um. Counting socks or whatever I'm doing at that point. They're a young couple, really nice couple, and they come up to us and I'm like, oh, hey guys, you made it. I said, where, uh, where are your friends?

And just like this, as casual as can be, and I'm not making this up, he's like, Oh, they're, uh, they're getting kicked out of the hotel right now. Are there any beds left or? Sorry, yeah, so the one couple, they did in fact get kicked out of the hotel. No, I never really got the story.

I think there's, I don't know, selling guns in the lobby or something. I don't know, groped maybe. I never really got the entire story, but, uh, something happened. I was very busy, uh, but, uh, this is what makes them a little.

Bit different than a lot of other people. They don't know us. They've never met us. They don't listen to the podcast.

They've never heard of the podcast. They've never seen us on Twitter. There's Instagram, nothing. We are fresh to them.

Yeah, they didn't even know about the workshop. They had no idea. So there's no preconceived notions, nothing going on. So we had already had a conversation in the pool with them.

We're like, yeah, we're not really, we can't. Play on the resort property. So they come out out of the workshop. This is over at Pearl.

You're talking by the bar at somebody else, and she comes over to me with a look on her face that is reminiscent of a lot of people who come over and say, thank you so much. That was really wonderful. And she comes right over to me with that look on her face and she says, Can you come to our room? Uh, no, we can't actually, I can't.

She's like, OK, um, well, we want to give you guys a tip because we didn't, uh, bring our cash with us. Uh, where are you guys gonna be? Uh, we're like, well, we're gonna go to the jacuzzi, we're gonna have a drink. If you wanna give us some, that's great.

If not, we'll we'll see you down there. So we go down to the jacuzzi, we have a drink, right? We talked to them a little bit and then they were talking to somebody else and we were talking to somebody else, so we never really got to connect. And then I had jumped up on the ledge because I was super horny and I had my junk jewelry on.

And you started to blow me the side of the thing, so I'm blowing you and, and that woman comes over and she's like, Can I, can I help? I felt bad because I was like, you can't. Well, I was like, and she was pretty too. She was really pretty and I'm like, I here I am with this heart on and sticking out my junk jewelry on, and she comes over and she's like, Can I help?

And of course you can, lady. That's what it's here for, but you can't. So, and I didn't want to do any explanation because it's like you'd have to lose your heart on and I was like, I didn't really, we hadn't prepared for that excuse. And the couple comes over.

They're leaving now. So the couple that comes over and they're like, Hey, here's some money we wanted to give you. We just wanted to thank. And she, you're still holding my cock, right?

And she sort of puts her hand on my chest while she's bending down, saying bye. She's giving you a little of the art of touch right back, yeah. And I'm like, Oh, keep touching my body. So she starts sort of rubbing me and then you start blowing me.

Oh my God, I want to have sex with these people. No, can do. So they're like, Hey, we have to go. We're going to dinner.

We're having dinner with a bunch of people. We're like, All right, have fun. It's great. If you get bored tonight, give us a call.

We will be at our house. Here's my number. Here's my number. And he's like, All right, I'll take your number.

I literally, I don't think anything of it. And we go on our way. We go over to a bed and have amazing sex. You're welcome.

That was just the perfect amount of wind. You're having sex and you're talking about the wind? No, because it makes such a huge difference. Oh, good.

I'm glad it's not my hip thrusting or it's, it's like my sensual touch. So temperature was perfect. The wind was perfect. The music was perfect.

It was just like so hot. Awesome being at the bottom of that. I love being outside sex. There was a slight gale coming out of the northwest.

The humidity was at 56.5, and I almost came, but the dew point was off. So whatever. So then we go home, we do sexy stuff like sit on the couch and watch Castle Rock. So that was it.

We sort of call it a night and crawl into bed by 11 o'clock. I wake up in the morning and I see a WhatsApp and it's from her. Well, she says it's from him. I got his number, but it's like it's from her.

Oh my God, they texted last night and immediately I'm like, oh, I'm such an idiot. Going to bed so early, they actually reached out, but I need coffee. And so I go downstairs, I, I'll read the whole thing when I get down some coffee, grab the coffee, I open the text, 4:30 a.m. she writes, hey, by any, I know it's late, but by any chance, are you guys around?

I mean, I just sort of giggle to myself because it's like 8 o'clock in the morning now, and I write back, you know, ha ha ha, that is literally the latest booty call I've ever gotten in my life, and then they're leaving that day, they have a flight that day out. I got a text at like 10:30 and they're like, hey, um, we were wondering if we could just maybe stop by on the way to the airport. This is fucking brilliant. So they're like, honey, honey, hold, stop.

What the fuck you're doing, stop right now. What? I was like, that couple from yesterday, yeah, they just texted. They have a flight at 5 o'clock.

They wanna stop by on their way to the airport. What say you? You're like, let's fucking do it. That sounds like a great plan.

All right, man, the hatches, we sort of got our crap together. They came over here on the way. To the airport we had a little afternoon drink, a little layover, yeah, had an amazing time. I love daytime sex anyway.

They were such a sweet, hot couple. I mean they were just so nice, gracious. Here's my point. So when we're, we're talking to them downstairs, right, here are two adventurous motherfuckers who just took a cab in Mexico.

To basically strangers, we didn't spend really that much time together, maybe an hour tops, if you even if you culminate all of that time together, maybe an hour, you're coming in a foreign country, literally on the way to an airport to leave the country. That takes guts, that takes confidence, but it also says these people know what they're doing, right? It sort of sends that signal, right? But they didn't.

They were just. Sort of starting, right, so they were like, you know what, we actually are sort of just stepping into this. We've had a couple of first times, but it really helps at that point because it doesn't make it awkward. I, I thought it went off really well.

Um, I had an amazing time. Her butt was so hard and so round. I can still see it and feel it in my head. I'm squeezing it right now in my brain.

Both were so cute. The butt, and you loved his butt. I loved his butt too, and I was like, she gets all the butt attention. I was like, but you're hiding yours under the water.

And he goes, Oh well, you know, I don't know. She coined the best phrase. She was like, How far do you, uh, how far do you guys live? I don't know.

It's like a 5 minute. Ride and she goes, oh, it's a hop skip and a hump, hop, skip and a hump. That is mine now, lady. Thank you for that rolled off her tongue.

I'm like, oh my God. Got a booty call on the way to the airport. I don't know if that will ever happen again. Really fucking cool.

Yeah, it won't never happen like that again for sure. I think I came all over everyone as usual. Did I? I don't know.

Did you have to spit on anybody? No, I was not happy with my ejaculate volume though. No, you weren't. I remember that.

And then later when we had sex again, again, it was like teardrop come. People really responded to that. Well, it just sucks, man. I just.

It's the only part of peeing on someone I get. Like, I don't get anything about, right? That's what's gonna graduate you to golden showers. I don't like I can't do it.

I can't come anymore. I'm just gonna pee on you. Yeah, like I don't understand water sports. Everybody has their own thing.

That's great if you like to be peed on. I don't get anything about it, but that is the only part. That I can sort of relate to is like, well, if it's anything like. Yeah, if it's anything like I think I just peed a little bit like coming all over someone in gigantic volumes and yeah brother, I get it.

I get it, sister. What I can't even understand what you're saying. Do you, do you think you would make the same sound as an orgasm? I don't know while you're peeing?

How long do you pee? 20 minutes, but I have a prostate problem. It comes out like Morse code. No, it doesn't.

I don't know how. How, I don't know how long do you pee? I don't know, uh, 35 seconds. I'm not marking shit.

Like a dog beep beep beep and the tree beep. No, I don't save it up, no, it's like I don't know, 20 seconds. I've never timed stream. I have a nice steady strong stream.

What room are you in? 24, 15. What room are you in? 54.

What room are you in? Day pass. What room are you in? 30.

What room are you in? 63. Do hotel rooms turn you on? I think they do, away from home and away from your, generally away from your own town.

What is it about hotel rooms that make you want to fuck? Vacation sex is absolutely amazing. But what if you were on a business trip? When you go to a hotel, do you still Have that libido spike?

No, my wife has to be there. But what if you are on a business trip and she happens to be there? When you walk into a hotel room, do you immediately want to fuck? Absolutely.

What do you think it is about hotel rooms? I don't know. It's just a, it's just a room that's not your own room, a different bed. Do you know what makes hotel rooms sexy?

It's a new environment, different. Make it sexy. You're different. You're sexy.

I don't have to clean the sheets. It's a strange place. Do you like having sex in strange places also? Oh yeah.

All right, now we all have friends inside the lifestyle and outside of the lifestyle, and sometimes those worlds collide a little bit. Do you have anybody you know that you have a cover story for? What is our cover story? How do we know each other?

Go. Uh, we met socially. That's very vague. Where?

At a party. At a party. What kind of party? This sounds fun.

What would be a cover story of how you know us? Go. We went to school together. Very good.

What is our cover story? Hurry up. Go. Someone's asking.

Yeah, I like that. We were, we, you can't steal his. What's yours? We used to work together.

What is your cover story? You met us. Gori through friends. Hi, how do you know these people?

We met them in Cancun. Yeah, Cancun's huge. Yeah, on the beach together. What is your cover story?

How do we know each other? Go. We met you on vacation, really? Where?

In Cancun, Brett's a big city. Specifically, where? Um, at a resort. You're being incredibly vague, sir.

What is our cover story? We met on vacation. What were we doing that we met on vacation? We were walking the beach.

We just started talking on the beach, and now we're all vacationing together. I buy that. How do you know these people? Porto Morales rent an Airbnb.

That is a really good cover story. She wins so far. How do you know us? Uh, we don't have that cover story yet.

We're like screwed, I guess. Oh my God, I hope so. So who here just by a show of hands is in the lifestyle? My husband's right here.

All right, so you're in the lifestyle, your wife's not. I'll talk to you. OK, gets nervous. If, if there's a new lifestyle couple.

Would it be better to be upfront with a couple and tell them we're inexperienced, or do you think it'd be better to just fake it until you make it? No, we're inexperienced. We're very inexperienced. If you would have asked me this two weeks ago, I would have had a different answer.

What would have been the answer two weeks ago? We're absolutely not, but now you're experienced, apparently, yeah. OK. Would you recommend that they be honest and upfront or fake it till you make it?

You got to be honest because you may see these people again. Honest, honest, honest, fake it. You make it 100% honest. Oh, for sure, this lifestyle doesn't work without demanding communication all the time.

Fake it till you make it, or we, we're virgins. I'm going with, hey, we're virgins. You fake it till you make it. Fake it till you make it.

You tell the other couple, we haven't done this. We've never done this. Honesty, honesty. What about you guys?

I think we were honest, but then we tried to really remember. So you tried to be honest, then after that tried to turn it up a couple of notches. All right, Lauren, that's it. We made it through another month.

Our livers are still semi-intact. How do you feel? We didn't have to quit the podcast, not yet, but so close. What we're gonna pursue.

I don't even know if there's gonna be another podcast next month because we are not at the hotel next month. All right, we'll throw something together. Maybe we'll do karaoke. Or something.

Oh my God, yeah, so we are going to the United States in the middle of winter, and that is not gonna be fun. All right, so to all the people who booked, thank you so much. We really, really appreciate it. Don't forget, if you are planning to go to Desire, you wanna come to Desire, book.

Through our link on room 77life.com, it costs you nothing and it really helps us out. Also, if you want to go to Temptation or you feel like going to sea on a desire cruise, do it on our website. It really, really helps us out. And it is official.

We are going to RM for my birthday party. So come and see us, uh, when is it? March, March 1st, March 1st and 2nd. So it's leap year, February 29th, and the 1st and 2nd we'll be staying at our own.

We will have balloons and, yeah, tickets that buy you oral. Come and get drunk and fondle me. That's what I want for my birthday. Just wrap yourself in a bow.

You don't have to bring me anything, but it is proper etiquette. Consider to become a Patreon. It's cheap. It really helps us out.

I'm gonna create a Patreon Facebook page because so many of them show up at the hotel. I have no idea what they look like. And then I find out like hours into a conversation they're like, we're a Patreon, and I'm like, Oh, I'm an asshole. Yeah, it's horrible.

I hate. That feeling we're gonna do something about that. But anyway, who are the crazy motherfuckers who gave us money this month? So thanks to Mr.

Hickey, Bill Kay, Amy, and Doug, the Colorado Cali kids who are raising their pledge, CNC 620, Vladimir put it in. For also raising his pledge, SEGC 73. I don't even know how to say that one. Hertz 1438, John L.

Mark McMahon, and Chris and Jen for raising their pledge. Thanks so much guys. Remember, you get a lot of special attention from being a Patreon and an inner love that you just can't really buy, but you can with $5 with $5. So thank you for that.

I was able to reserve 10 new Tesla cyber trucks that we You will be giving away instead of bikinis. Don't forget to go to Instagram and check out the playmaker B at M_B E R N A L D. Also, don't forget to follow us on social media, Twitter and Instagram, ruins 77 podcasts, or write us an iTunes review or just any sort of review anywhere you feel like it. And last but not least, Malibu strings, not the bikini you want to see your 20-something year old daughter in, but we do.

All right, that's it for us. See you next time, guys. And that about does it for us. For more information, photos, or to contact us, go to room 77 podcast.com.

Thanks for stopping by room 77. We had a blast. Now get your clothes and get out.