Ep. 81: Doing Gay Stuff in the Manliest Man Way Possible (at Desire)

All right, Lauren, in this episode, we talk about going back to desire after 4 years and Richard having to pay for it with pegging, which is exactly what it sounds like and not Room 77's new cryptocurrency. We hook up with couples and I did a lot of gay stuff but made sure to say no homo before everything, so I still consider myself as straight as Puff Daddy. You don't give a fuck. All right, Lauren, welcome back.

Thank you Richard. I am enjoying my tan. Oh, so tan, Richard, tan all over. How did you get tan all over, Richard?

It's funny you ask because I, I've been participating in the Malata tan too. I have told my listener before, a little bit of that. I do tend to take a little too much and wind up too brown, but the problem is we don't always have the opportunity to get fully nude. We don't, no, because we live in a community where, uh, we don't have a nude pool and you don't even get naked at our own events.

I mean, during the day. I don't because it's always, it's always awkward. You want to get naked and then I have to get on a ladder or a chair and go do something and that's just bad naked. We need you in the lobby, goddamn it, where's my pants?

I know, yeah, the GM needs to see you. Oh man, I need pants for that. I don't wanna talk to Carlos naked. That's so awkward.

Hi guys, can I get the numbers for this week? Stop looking at my junk. This is a business meeting, for God's sake, eyes up here. But speaking speaking of events, how many, how many rooms do we have left?

8. It's 8 and then it's 7 and then it's 8 and then it's 7 because people then they don't come and it's like goddamn stock market keeps selling out and then not selling out. I just want to sell out. Can you people just buy the tickets?

It's just getting frustrating. Richard. Do it for my heart, please. But anyway, speaking of sin coming this October, I was notified, uh, by two of our guests that we have placed the event on Yom Kippur.

So we are starting a new part of the campaign for our October event, and this is how it goes. Hey Jews. During our October event this year, make sure to come and celebrate the holiest of holy days at sin. That did not sound exactly the way I wanted it to.

All right, if you are Jewish, but this is what I, this is what I do wanna say, if you are Jewish and you need a special holiday package, we will provide you with special days. You do not need to prove that you are Jewish, no documents or home movies of your bat mitzvah, just photos of your husband's junk. That'll do it. That'll do it.

Just show us a package and receive the package. This is available for a limited time. Your junk may be double-checked in person. It's a special that we're running right now.

It's the Yom Kippur special because we love Jews. We love Jews. We love junk. Everybody wins.

Everyone wins. This is an everybody wins episode. Anyway, make sure just for my heart health, if you guys, if you're waiting on booking this thing, uh, can you just go book it because I honestly, I can't anymore. Can you tell us how you got your all over tan?

Yes, thank you for getting me back on track. We had the opportunity where two friends called us up and said it's been 4 years since you've been at Desire. Would you like to go? And we said, uh, we're scared.

Uh, we can't afford it. They said, Look, we want to treat you guys to go up there, and these are two very good friends of ours. We want to give you two nights, go up there with us. Don't be afraid.

We, we think it's been long enough. Yeah, and they're probably right, but we still are just like, no, I don't want to go. Yeah, we, we were, we were shying away from it for a long time because, quite frankly, we didn't know what was gonna happen. Things ended in a very vague odd way.

We didn't know if things would be like they're sorry, no vacancy or uh there were sharpshooters on the roof. It's just a very, very odd ending ending. So it was a mixture of a lot of things that was just like don't know, don't wanna I don't wanna I don't wanna be and uh you know, after time you're just like uh whatever. So we love hanging out.

We've been friends with these two, very close with these two for a very long time, and I know what everybody's thinking. Oh, couple wants to, uh, bring you to a resort only because they want to fuck you. Well, you should know Mr. or Mrs.

Smartypants. Yeah, we already did, yeah, and we fuck them all the time. So there, so then what are they getting? I'll tell you another thing.

She's younger than me, and I'll tell you another thing. He's more handsome than I am. I'll tell you another thing. Good and bad.

I'll tell you another thing, they have more sex than we do. So it really wasn't, it's not one of those things where it's like, uh, they're, they're looking for anything. It just genuinely really enjoy each other's company. Well, we went to RM and we got to experience, they call it Eden.

Did you like what you saw? I thought it was gorgeous. Yeah, I thought they did a really good job. I was like, wow, this finally feels like a great.

Party place. It looks like a resort. Yeah, it feels more not like a hotel that was made into a concept hotel. First of all, that's how I got my all over tan.

The first thing I did was knowing that I have the melano tan in my system, went straight in the pool, laid on my stomach, and, and, and, and, and sunned my ass, ass in the air, yeah, ass in the air, all fours. I don't care what anybody. I thought I just went full doggy and pointed my rectum at the sun. Just Zumba around me, Kevin.

Yeah, so that's I got my all over town now how I maintain this, I don't know because I can't afford to go there, but uh we we had a lot of fun while we're there. I miss having a place because let's face it, if you don't know us. Yeah. Then why are you listening, really?

If you, if you don't know, we, we started going to 2012, so it's over a decade of being familiar with that place, twice a year since 2012, and then living there for three months and then being there every day for three straight years and then never seeing it again. So it takes a lot out of your life when it was such a big part of your life and there is this thing that you get out of it that can't be sort of replaced. There's, there's really not any other place that we. We can go just because of where we are because we had spent so much time there going back and it being a different look, a new space, a new construction.

It felt like we were getting to experiencing something new for the first time. Everything was everyone, everything was new for everyone with us, and that felt good because there was no like looking around going, oh, I remember when there really, uh, except when we got into the old disco and you're like. This is where we did the art of touch and then play time with that couple. Now we had promised this lovely beautiful lady that she would be able to peg me.

Now she is one of 3 women in my life that has ever pegged me, uh, you, her. And then some other lady that we actually just saw at the uh at the takeover. So we promise her if you pay for our stay at Desire, you get to take my ass. That's a that's a normal deal.

In any civilized society, I just pulled up the contract like on Google it was already like pre-written. It was so common. They have templates, yeah, a template that's exactly so we had brought the strap on. Thing was, is going into it, I, my stomach was not feeling great and there's something about getting pegged when your stomach isn't feeling great.

It is just not a sexy thing. I don't want to get into the details of it. I think the women listener will understand. Yes, I mean, even if it's not anal, we still like, if your stomach's messed up, you still want to do sex.

Yeah, it just feels a lot of pressure. I don't know how you ladies feel when you're, when you feel bloated and you're getting fucked. It's not, it's not the sexiest feeling. Yeah, you hear me, girls?

You know what that feeling when you feel full already. They hear me. They do. We couldn't make that happen, which was sad because we were, you were looking forward to it.

I was looking forward to it. It was just, it's just always sort of a sexy experience with them because we are so comfortable with them. Um, just this is where we had the successful 11 2nd DVP. And we only do this because when we're really comfortable with a couple, the listener doesn't really care how much we love these people, but let's just say, here's, here's what I love about first of all, we call him Coke can cock.

He's been in the episodes before. We've talked about him before because he can't even wear normal size condoms. They, they look like you call them like they look like crop tops when he puts on them. A normal condom.

They also don't have a lot of hang ups, right? They're just really into fun. So I enjoy watching his cock enter you. Why?

Because he's really thick and I like seeing you in a little bit of pain. I'm sorry. I know you do, but she also enjoys watching me watch him inside it. So one of the.

The things that she allows me to do, and not every couple allows me to do this, she allows me to crawl underneath of you while he's fucking you doggy, so I can just be under there watching. I mean, it's one of the, it's one of my favorite things in the world, but you have to be really, really comfortable. You gotta be a comfortable couple to, to be able to do that. I'm happy they do.

Then they throw out there, let's try DVP. Yeah, I'm like, my, I didn't even answer. I don't think I'm like. Uh, it's, it's always gonna be a no from you, but we have to keep trying.

We have to keep trying. You're like, yes, that's a great idea. I mean, we just, the thought is always like, yes, this is the right couple, wrong cock. That's why I was hesitant.

I'm like, are you kidding? I can barely take just one. How are you gonna squeeze yours in too? It seems like every time we get a chance at DVP, it's always with someone with a, with a ginormous cock.

I'm still fine with it anyway. So I think I did enough research from the last time that we failed. I was like, I got the position. I know how it's done now.

Yeah, you're like a sophomore now. Yeah, so I like put, put him in position. Like I see it in porn and I'm like, mhm, got it. Like I'm watching it like a football play.

I'm like, all right, all right, tail back that way, running back to the side. All right, so screen to the left. Receivers are running post flag. Got this.

I got this. This is no problem whatsoever. So my first position for me anyway is to lay him out much like a corpse. Like I just have to put him underneath you on his back and I'm gonna lay spread over top of him.

He's gonna go in you first and then I am going to gently enter you from coming in like a tarmac, I guess so. I don't know. It was funny because you're supposed to have your legs together if you're the bottom person and he kept like spreading his legs and then you kept trying to spread your legs on top of outside and you're like together, together, but I don't know, maybe he couldn't hear behind my torso couldn't hear anything. She's buried.

So then I start questioning every video. I was like, I'm like, is that how they were? I'm trying to bring up the pictures in my head of how it was. There's just no room, mainly because you're really small, he's really large.

I should be able to fit in. And again, all I'm thinking in my head is Lauren hasn't been practicing. Lauren has not been stretching herself out because I was planning on pegging. I know, but Richard doesn't feel good.

So, so I'm trying to get it in. I'm trying. I'm getting like the head in and I can't, and then he's slipping out and then, and then you're, and then I'm like, I got it. Oh, this feels so good.

He wasn't in and then I'm like, damn it. I, I, I looked at she's watching everything. Yeah, she's watching everything. She's loving it and I'm trying to open up so they can see and things are.

Falling out and her both her and I, we're grabbing both of them. I grabbed both cocks to shove them in there because I'm getting so frustrated at this point. And at one point I have both of our cocks in my hand. I'm looking down.

I'm comparing the thickness of his cock against my cock, and I pause every everything in my life pauses. And I'm like, god damn it, look at that. That is just, that is just pathetic. Look at the size difference.

goddamn it, focus, Richard. It's like the Russian dolls again. Yeah, so I had to just focus. I had to get that out of my head and then it went in you again doing.

Which is not and, and also creeping up towards the headboard like you're running away from me. We 11 seconds I think it worked, right? We did get video of it. Well, yeah, she was like, do you want me a video of this for your OnlyFans?

I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. And I'm trying to relax and spread open and just like lay on him without but not crush him because if I hold myself up, I'm engaging my abs, which then pushes the cocks out. So she grabs the phone with one hand and then just like grabs the cocks like. I gotta get this on film.

Like she's the director and then that's it and you grabbed them and shoved them in because you're angry. It was like all this angry DVPing happening. Yeah, there are points in there. I just want to let you know how much you should appreciate me.

Moments I get to where I'm just like, I'm just gonna fucking stick it in. It's gonna hurt. I'm sorry. But then I don't.

Like I just get right to that point where I'm like, it's gonna be like ripping the band-aid off and then I don't because I'm like, I'm really afraid of hurting you. 11 seconds. We, we, we can keep working on it and it felt so good, yeah, it does, I guess I imagine it felt good to me too. I'm, I'm sure it felt good to him.

He didn't know what the hell was going on. Um, he was just lying there. He had no idea what, what was happening at any point. The poor guy is under you like trapped under an avalanche, uh, and comes out of it afterwards going, What happened?

What happened? Tell me everything. Did it happen? What did it look like?

Describe everything, because I just stood there. Waiting for everything to either happen or not happen. Tell me everything. His wife was like, it it did happen.

It was successful for a short period of time. Now usually when a problem like this occurs, I go straight to YouTube, not knowing what you're doing, what's the problem? Yeah, example, honey, I cannot get the damn light bulb into the slot in the jeep. Go straight to YouTube.

Oh, that's how it goes in. This is not a video you can find on YouTube. So it's quite problematic. It's like, it's like you can watch porn, but it's edited so much and it just looks really easy because why would they give you a how-to?

She said, Alright, let me try. So then she got into the same position. I tried to go in and she was like, No, no, no, no, no, no. So it, it wasn't just you.

She's kind of a pro as well. So I was like, alright, it's, it's not just my wife, so I will not in fact leave her and find a younger, more gaping wife. Gaping, gaping. Look, sometimes we want you loose, sometimes we want you tight.

That is not a word that I think women would ever want associated with them. Oh my God, you were so gaping. Oh, look at that gaping vagina, that gaping hole. I'm gonna go in there and you'll never feel me.

That happens. So we were kind of unsuccessful. I mean, if I was riding a bull, I'd be a rock star at 11 seconds, but I don't think DDP counts for would have made a movie about that. When you fail, what do you do?

You get up and you pull yourself up by your boots continuing the rodeo punt, and you try again. No, you do drugs. This is what you do. So we were given shivers.

You remember the shivers, shivers, right? So shivers, yeah, the shivers gummies are a THC, female enhancers. Yeah, there's a female and a male. I call them the anal openers.

I don't know if that's the name. Name they're gonna go with maybe the gapers, but this is a great way for those people who don't want to do anything dangerous. It's a delicate, just a poop enhances sensation sensitivity, which makes you, you feel like all your parts are just right there on the surface. We said let's pop this and see what happens next and what happens?

More success. How did you feel? Just felt a little more open. I felt open.

I felt relaxed, uninhibited, very sensitive, kind of how I felt. Good way for most women or most people who do get that feeling of anxiety to try something different that does relieve that anxiety. Yeah, and it's a gummy, so you take one and it's not, did I smoke too much because that's happened to me or too, you're like, I'll just. a little and then you're gone, right?

And shivers is not like injecting themselves like you, not like injecting, you know what I mean, because you're like holding a spoon and a lighter. I'm like, Lauren, relax. It's, it's very, very cool. So we got a code for you.

Go to shivers.store and use promo code R77 at checkout. Then you will get 10% off. Get your oh that oo. Wound up really well because she successfully did the DVP.

You successfully did the DVP for more than 11 seconds. You still didn't get your trophy. I didn't get a. I didn't get my minute chipped yet, but I'm working on it.

But it did help. So next time you do more shivers, I think. I don't know if that's necessarily how it works. I'm gonna take 2.

You're gonna take 2, and we'll do anal on each other. Alright, alright, where do they go again? Go to shivers.store code R77. So what we need is we actually need two things.

So if this could serve two purposes, we need, I need a bookkeeper, if anybody does bookkeeping, we really need a bookkeeper that can work with the budget, and we need a DVP coach. Now, I'm not saying it's mandatory that you can do both, but that would help our budget. Is the DVP coach have to participate, or can they coach via Zoom? Depends.

If you get to participate, is that a discount or is that an upcharge? We'll have to work out what the deal is. Maybe participate, but I don't know. I may want to keep it strictly professional.

The bookkeeping, however, I will not be participating in that. Me neither. OK, great. That was just the starter of the trip, that was uh it was just a warm-up.

We finished that night and, uh, you know, I'm sure the entire resort applauded somewhere, maybe inside, they felt it, they felt the energy. We went home and went to bed, started all over again the next day. All right, Lauren, it's that time again. Bikini Addiction time.

That is right. Bikini Addiction sold a lot of bikinis. Yeah, when the new stock color came out. Yeah, I think it's mostly because of us.

I mean, I'm, I'm giving us most of the credit. Why is that Richard? Well, because we came up with a genius campaign. This genius campaign also got me into a little bit of trouble.

See, what we did is we infused a fear tactic into the campaign and we made it very, very sexist. Which usually works. When HR from Bikini Addiction reached out to me and said that was very, very sexist, I was like, of course it was, that's what we were going for, nailed it. They said no, no, no, a lot of the Bikini Addiction clients are the men, you moron, the failure men were right in front of my face and I wasn't even looking at them.

Stupid. Why do I sound angry, Lauren? Because I was born this way. Also because I learned that a lot of men were buying ladies bikinis and this made me feel a little bit less than.

Just maybe I should buy you a bikini, and I know that there's a guy out there right now who knows what I'm talking about, you know what I mean? He's just like I didn't. Get anything nice for my wife in a while, and today is the day that we go out there and we buy our ladies a bikini from Bikini Addiction, maybe some flowers and maybe some floss because you've been forgetting it every single time you come home from work and you keep forgetting, get the floss. Bikini Addiction doesn't only make women look better, it can make the men look better too.

So go to Bikini Addiction and make yourself look great, guys. Buy her a Bikini Addiction bikini. You win, she wins, we all win except for the Philadelphia Eagles. They will not win.

Lauren, tell these guys where to go. Go to bikiniadddiction.com and at checkout use promo code room 77 and you will save 10% on your gift for your lady. Bikini Addiction, they got you covered, not that coverage, just enough minimum coverage, maximum confidence. So a little backstory before we start on day two is on the way in, we had to go check into our room.

Yeah, we hadn't got our room yet. It wasn't ready. So we were in the lobby and someone who knows us from Facebook and comes over. It's like, hey, are you Lauren and Richard?

And we're like, Yeah, yeah, we are. Who are you? Who are you two fuckers? And he's being, uh, he's being like, you were the travel person who booked my room here, so thank you.

And we're like, oh my God, what are the chances? This is fantastic. So, like these, I don't even know how to describe, they're young, they're like bouncing little balls. They're just balls of energy and we're like, oh my God, how fun.

Well, she wasn't a ball of energy. She had just taken a really long flight and didn't want anyone to talk to her or see her. She described herself as feeling crusty and he was feeling very social and all she wanted to do was take a shower. So she was like trying to get out of the situation.

And he was like he was like trying to socialize, you're right, but we had a laugh about it in the lobby and I just remember thinking I'd do them and you had inadvertently made a comment about pegging because pegging was still on your brain and they had responded back with, yeah, we'll do that or he'll do that we love that or something popular we're like, hm, interesting, noted, we'll get back to you later. Go take a shower. Later on in the in the night. I was kind of looking for them in the in the crowd, and then I, I spotted them.

I don't know if I saw them at the pool. I don't really remember. They were just always everywhere. That's what I remember.

Yeah, I think they, we saw them at the pool and introduced them to our friends, and then we just kind of started having a gaggle. Like there was people would just come over and yeah, it just started accumulating that day. Uh, we were sitting in the pool and this is the part that I miss is you, you turn to him and you're like, all right, I am gonna go over to the bed and give him a hand job, and he's like, oh, that sounds lovely, and you're like, well, come on over and you can watch. He's like, I will go get a drink and come over and watch.

They come over while you're in the middle of doing that and it starts to turn into a very touchy session right by the pool and because it's our first trip back we're like we're like. I know, but we're like, should we be pushing the boundary at the pool, right? So I say, alright, I have an idea. I know the hot tub, the old hot tub, not the new one, because it's not open yet.

The old one, we have to walk all the way there. I know it's not open yet, but I know there's beds up there. Why don't, no pressure, we just won't do any penetration. We'll just do.

A lot of heavy petting for 30 minutes and then we'll come back just easy peasy, right? Yeah, it was like and then we'll go eat lunch. It was lunch after and then just lunch. It's just casual.

It's nothing serious. So then uh they're like, cool, let's do that. Um, we walk up there. I think we're fucking inside of 60 seconds.

So I broke my own rules, but when we, when we got up there, we learned very quickly that they were both openly bi. Yeah, like by play they're whatever, which we were fine with. We're like, whatever, let's have some fun. Yeah, so it was like flowy and fluid and it was then things escalated very quickly.

So it starts, you know, you say, let's be casual about it. Let's be casual about it, and before you know it, I'm getting ready to stick my cock in you, and he's like, Well, I thought there was no penetration. So I'm like, well, I'm not breaking the rules if you put my cock in. Her and my own wife, then it's you putting my cock in right.

So we all agreed, and he did that. So we fucked. I think I came. I don't remember.

I don't remember if I think you were going to save it. I don't remember. I don't know. It was a lot of fun.

Yeah, it was like parallel play and then we had lunch. It wound up being really, really hot and then it's so spontaneous. I love it. Yeah, it was very spontaneous.

It was very hot. It was very fun and then we went and and had lunch after that. I miss those times so much. That is the, the stuff that is like, oh my God, and people who are like, guys, I can't do.

Spontaneous stuff. I'm like, oh my God, I just, it's great. It was perfect. And then that night we're out dancing.

I mean when I say dancing, this is how I dance. I will hop around for 27 seconds in intervals of like 27 seconds and then I'll stop and I'll scream in your ear and then I will stop and bounce around for 22 seconds. And then I will wander away and then I'll come back and then I'll jump around in a semi-rhythmic pattern for another 19 seconds and then I will lean over and I will complain about the DJ and begin a discussion about what logical choice he or she made for changing the song, the date of that song, and how abrupt the transition was. I will bring up the fact that it is a different genre, it is a different beat, it is a different culture and a different mood.

Once we have solved that issue, I will start to hop again or pretend that I know the merengue. That will last for 17 seconds and then I will wander off again. That is exactly how I dance at every event. Oh my God, it is like an ADHD person that dances.

I have a lot of fun, so it doesn't really matter. At least you always tell me like, I'll be right back. I'll be right back. What is this song?

Everyone, everyone stop. I need to have a discussion. It was the worst transition ever. Can we all stop dancing?

Why are y'all still dancing? Are we gonna stand for this? We, we decide to, to leave. We go back now.

We had been talking more about the whole pegging thing. My stomach is still fucked up. Richard, but they are still into it. We found out that they are pegging aficionados.

I know they have like an assortment of it. Attachments and like all this stuff and I'm like oh my god, he just landed in my lap. I'm so excited so we give up on the disco. I ain't got I ain't got time for that.

I don't have time, but we go back to the room just to describe them again. She is a tiny spinner, beautiful short hair, tight body. Oh my god, she had so many abs. He is a muscular, bald-headed, just a.

Manly stocky guy with an ass that looks like it belongs on a Calvin Klein ad. That's what it looks like. That's so true. He's a manly man.

That's very important. That's very important operative phrase in that sense with these really big thick legs, not like mine. No, not like mine. No, they, they definitely squat way more than both of us added together.

I, I, I can't even look down at my legs. It's just. Both of their genitalia checks out. Beautiful genitalia.

I'm very happy that uh we've decided to again wind up with these people in our room. We have a quick talk and we prove to one another that we've both been tested. Yeah, we had recent tests. All clean, so we decide this is going to be a bareback night.

So I in my head here, this is a bareback skate, barebacks on the floor. This skate is for barebacks only, barebacks, barebacks only on the floor. This skate is barebacks only. And then you start hooking up the lights and the music and they are openly bias so it's just it's, it's, it's just a different energy.

It's like there's no hangups, there's no insecurities, um, it's just kind of whatever is happening in the room is good. Yeah, it's just a little, it is, it is less pressure. It is a little very free. I want you to imagine all of the positions that you can fucking 4 people can fuck in, including.

Pegging and then I would take all these people and twist them all up like a pretzel and that's what we look like for a for a full hour. That's what we look like. So there was one point where she was on top of me and she was riding me and she's like she's muscular, she's a tight girl. She's got these muscular legs and she was fucking me up and down so hard that I was like, how long can she last?

because that's, that's not easy. You're talking to a guy who can barely make it downstairs. That's true. But she went, she kept going and going and going, and she started sweating before.

She quit and said, my legs hurt. I'm like, I just want to see how long you could go, and she went forever. I would need a bungee cord attached to the ceiling to do that. I would need an assist, those little elastic chair things that you sit on that help you because I still want to get this goes back to the basket idea.

Yeah, I do like maybe 20, and I have to then stop and do the grinding thing and she was literally doing, I, I mean she must have done like 200 squats on you, easy, 2 thumbs up, um. That means, can I tell you my part what we were doing? Yeah, tell us your part. So he was he was inside me and he was fucking like a rock star with that.

He's got that ass that he can fuck hard and then he would go so deep and just grind like super slow. I was, oh my God, I love it. Guys do that because not a lot of guys will they kind of just do like the pulse, pulse, pulse, pulse, pulse, and they think that that's going to make you come, but it's so like, well, tell, tell the guys where they're supposed to grind. Well, it's not where you're supposed to grind it's the, it's the pushing of that energy that you're like you're shoving it so deep.

Me and then you're pressing it. Yeah, I mean, if you can hit the clip bonus, hello, but he, we had our foreheads pressed together. He took my legs, threw them together like a pretzel and flipped them to one side. I mean, he, he was in charge, knew what he was doing, and I was melting in the bed and just like I, I don't even know what kind of sounds I was making, but.

I was watching and closing my eyes and opening and closing. It was heaven for me. We had sort of finished the Kama Sutra book as far as positions went. And she was a good fucker too.

And I don't mean fucking me. I mean fucking him. Yeah, watching him get pegged was, oh my God, was so hot. It's like his manly body on all fours and her just pounding him was under those lights.

It was so hot. That was over an hour, but we still weren't finished. We didn't want to finish. So she and I just start making out.

I'm so into her. I'm into her body and we're just into each other. We start making out. I'm all over her and then I'm all over him.

We're in a sandwich and so I'm like, I want to see some guy on guy stuff and she's like me. She got super excited and she's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, guy, guy stuff. So you grab your vibrator, you're both lying against the headboard of the bed and you're already touching yourself like and go, tickets, I bought my tickets, go. And I'm like, alright, fine, I'll touch his body, a nice body, soft skin, supple skin, not supple, manly skin, farm tractor working manly man skin.

We'll be right back. Everyone, if you want to get into our pants virtually, you have to become a member. Go to room 77life.com and in the top click become a member. If you wanna do us, this is your first step.

If you wanna not to us and just support us, this. This is the perfect way to do it. Go to our website and click become a member. If you want to get closer to yourself as a person and find the meaning of life, this is the first step.

It's worth 5 bucks per month. What does it do for you? I could tell you, but you wouldn't understand. It's that deep.

You just have to experience the feeling like hundreds of others. Go into our private Telegram chat group, ask them for yourself. Ah, you see what I did there? You can't because you have to join to get in there.

It's a catch-22. Me and my father would call that a pile of shit. I didn't wanna have to bring my dead father into this. You did that yourself, listener, and now I don't know any other way to feel better than for you to join.

That's what we call a guilt trip sale or as my father would also call pile of shit. All of these people who joined last month that we're gonna list right now, they also want a free vacation. Charles, Donald, Tisa, Michael, Coyote, Piccolo Doc, K, Claudio, Eric, and Robert. That is a sale by deception because it's not true.

Also rightfully called a pile of shit. What's not a pile of shit is becoming a member. Go do it now at room 77life.com and click become a member at the top. We'll wait, we'll even pause this for you.

Hey, Google, pause. Alexa, pause podcast. Siri, pause podcast. That should cover it.

I start touching his body, but he's being very respectful of me. Like he's just standing there taking it but enjoying it because who wouldn't? Yeah, we're both on our knees like standing facing, you're looking at us like we're putting on a show, you're at the show, you're on the stage like in the middle of West Hollywood. He's just being respectful of me, right?

So I just grabbed his big manly bald head and put it on my cock, and he started sucking my cock. He was a really good cocksucker. I'm watching the two of you just like, uh, I know we were, we were like coming over and over again and we like. We were both touching each other's nipples and squeezing them and like sneaking in little kisses here and there, but we were all intertwined, she and I.

Like I could not have been more close to her and slipped over my vibrator for her so she could come more. I mean, we were just coming, coming. And I'm doing this in a very manly, no homo way, right, because that's how you have to do this. You have to do this in a no homo way.

You have to grab his bald head and say, hey man, suck my cock, no homo, no homo, but don't forget those balls. My body, I didn't want to move. I just wanted to keep coming and coming and coming. Alright, well this is what I learned.

So pro tip for if you ever find yourself with a guy, here are the things that I would suggest you do. First of all, always be flexing because it's better if you're flexing, making muscles, looking manly. Also, when you're grabbing onto things, I didn't, I couldn't grab onto his hair because he was bald. You have to grab onto stuff like you're working on heavy machinery.

It's very different than grabbing onto it like you're gonna grab on a like you're grabbing a wrench, very, very different, right? I think he had like his shoulder or something. I don't know what you were using for leverage, but it was manly and hot, yeah. And then when you, when you say, 00 yeah, fuck yeah, like when you're fucking a guy, like you say, oh fuck yeah, you, you have to bring it down an octave.

Because usually when you do it to a girl you're like, oh fuck yeah, but when you got, you'd be like, oh fuck yeah, but you gotta be careful because you don't wanna hit, you don't wanna hit that Darth Vader level down in here, then it's, you're gonna make things awkward and weird. So not Sam Elliott. No, you don't want to. I mean if you had Sam Elliott, that'd be fucking awesome.

But, but yeah, you gotta, you gotta change your octave a little bit. You get. Change your, your man hands. It's, it's, these are things that make you look manly and make you sound manly so you can do gay stuff without having to deal with any of those gay thoughts that may be holding you back, you know what I mean.

So do those things and it's just that easy. I'm touching myself. You are touching yourself. I can't talk.

I'm sorry I'm being a pod. Your fingers are inside of you. That's what I have to deal with. Also, if you want to go to Desire, where all the gay stuff happens.

Go to Lauren's box. You'll find my box at room 77life.com. Click on my box, and you'll get a free bikini addiction bikini with every five night booking. Your fingers are.

Well, I could turn on a vibrator, but then you'd hear it in the background. All right, go play with your pussy. I'm sorry. It's just go play with your pussy.

All right, Lauren, we're back. Let me know if you need another masturbatory break. Should we schedule in here at room 77? It's part of HR.

Listen, the gay stuff turns me on. I don't know what to tell you. Well, now that I am fully straightly gay, I'm just, I'm looking for a dropdown menu on our profile. They have straight and then bi and then gay.

I'm waiting for somebody to add a no homo gay stuff. I don't seem to have that. I seem to have that one because I would know, I know what it means, right? I think that's a great idea.

You guys into soft swap is full swaps, full swap, girl, girl stuff, you know, homo gay stuff. Just try to work it into conversations, see what they say, and then you're gonna get, sorry, what did you say? I said I'm not a homo. I didn't ask if you're a homo.

I'm not a homo, but if, if you were, would I, would I be your type. You know, there's always a way out of it. I'm just saying, gun to your head, gonna suck cock, would it be a cock like this? What about this one?

Right, these are all easy questions that you can answer right now. I dare you. We always like to play a game in the beginning of our, our play sessions. I mean, this is normal.

Everybody does it. It's called Who's sucking your cock now. It's just something to loosen you up. Some people do those cards.

They ask questions. They have conversations. Truth or dare. This one's called What's in Your Mouth.

Alright, Lauren, we have to go because we really next month is the month that we have to get out of here. uh, but that did move our Florida trip up again. Again, we'll be shooting OnlyFans in Florida. Men, reach out, we're gonna be shooting stuff.

We need extra penises. Yeah, you just knock on the door, you walk in, you're there for 5 minutes. We give a brownie and a juice box. That's what you get for payment.

If you want to take us for a ride to see what you're getting, go join OnlyFans and look. OnlyFans.com/room77. You know, we haven't, uh, picked the theme nights at Sensation for October yet. So why don't we make one of the theme nights Try by, Try by, yeah, what do you dress like, um, Elton John.

Is that? No, that's, that's, it's pretty fucking gay actually. I don't know. What about P.

Diddy? Still up in the air. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to go leave a positive review. For more information, go to room 77life.com.

Thanks for stopping by room 77. We had a blast. Now get your clothes and get out. 2 You You go wait for us while we go.