Ep. 54: How To Navigate an Orgy

This podcast contains explicit content, language, and sexual situations. It is intended for adults 18 years of age and older. These thoughts and opinions expressed are not those of any specific employer, group, or individual. And with the rat race, we decided to sell everything and move to Cancun, Mexico.

Now we do what we love work, party, and play in the middle of paradise. Now we want to share the fun that we get to have every day. Come to room 77. Let's play.

All right, Lauren Richard here. Welcome back. It has been a long time. How are you?

I feel like you're soft talking me. Should I turn my volume off? No, I feel like it's because we're sitting closer together. Well, it's our new brand new state of the art studio that we built in our break.

It took a month to construct and now we are losing our home. And that is a true story. We have to move out of here after going through all of this because, uh, we're cursed. So, uh, everything that we did to construct this thing has to now be taken down and now it becomes useless.

It is a new year for us though. It is a new start. We have a dog. Oh my God, that is new, right?

So many new things. I tried cocaine. Who thought, who knew in 2022 I'd be saying I love cocaine. I don't know if I love cocaine, but it sure did help that night.

But we'll get to that in a second. Um, as opposed to being homeless, uh, how are you? Listen, I always land on my feet. I'm not scared, and, uh, we'll just see where the next road takes us.

I mean, this is part of, it's gotta be better than this fucking road. I mean this is filled with potholes and dirt and disgustingness, but, uh, it was good while it lasted. We had a good run. We did.

So everyone who got to, uh, come over to our home, yeah. Which is we're gonna talk a little bit about today in the subject of how much is too much uh when you're talking about orgies, right, yeah, so we had had this story that happened, uh, before the break where we had, I think, kidnapped the most amount of people that we ever kidnapped before. How many people were there? 88 people with us, with us, yeah.

So we had had a couple, one of the couples we had known for almost forever, I think. 4 years or so and then there was another couple that we had always wanted to have sex with. It just never ever lined up or worked out. Beautiful couple.

We finally got a chance to bait them back to the house. Also another couple who were just, I think, fans of the podcast, and their names are Drea and Ryan, and I promised that I would say their names on the podcast because Said, uh, yeah, fuck it, I don't care. I can't do a Boston accent, but they had really thick Boston accents. Awesome couple.

We basically baited them to come back to our the layer, the lair, the room 77 layer. So, uh, so we get them all back here after a lovely stroll on the beach and we do what any great kidnappers would do. We start to liquor them up. Sure, that's why it's out.

I, I mean we were getting really creepy. I think I went to the front door and I locked the latch. We didn't have a deadbolt at that point, but if we did, I would have deadbolted it. Now you can't leave.

We were just like, yeah, let's just hang out for a while. And one of the couples started at the very beginning, like, we can't stay very long, you know, this is what's happening. We got a plane to catch, da da da da. We're like, just come down anyway.

Yeah, and I love these people. I really wanted them. I've always wanted. I wanted them to be a little more involved than they always are because they're a beautiful couple.

They are very limited. I don't know in what they do. And I always enjoy giving them an experience that they otherwise feel safe doing with us because I feel like they can trust us. I don't know why.

We're trustworthy, Richard. They had to go. Here they are falling one by one, and I'm like, Do you need me to escort you out because I have other people here? And they're like, No, we got it.

We got it. We're good. Peace out. Now we're down to 6, right?

So we got to move fast. They're dropping like flies here, right? Yeah. So I'm like, All right, listen guys, I'm gonna go shower.

But before that, the one girl that I had always wanted to, I don't know how to put this, have sex with. Uh, she starts doing like, uh, poses in the living room, you know, those butt poses that bodybuilders do. She started doing that and I got hired from that and I never ever watched a bodybuilder do poses before and got erect that so that was a complete first to me and then I, I remember just taking my finger and just touching her butt. I was like, oh my god, I can't wait to touch her finally it's literally been.

Years side note, our new studio is very hot. Um, so you go into the shower, right, with who? Well, I just was like, I'm gonna go shower and then she, the poser, posing girl, is like, I asked Richard if I could go in the shower too, and he said, whatever suits your fancy. And so I highly doubt I, I use that phrase.

If I ever said, just so you know, if somebody said. Richard said, whatever suits your fancy, just call 911 because you know they killed me. You probably had too much cocaine. Yes, well, yes.

So she said, I asked Richard if I could come in and I'm like, yes, come in. And so I'm just like, can I loofah you because we're both so, and I like grabbed the loofah. I put soap on it and I just drop it because she starts kissing me and we're just like, oh my God, I'm. So attracted to her and yeah, they're both beautiful and they're both, they're both like bodybuilding people, but not like the bodybuilder people that, yeah, they're fitness people.

They're not like, oh my God, she can lift a car. People wear, well, it's called fitness. That's what you compete in. It's called fitness, the fitness level, I know, but this is what I call it.

I call it the fitness group and the I can lift a fucking car group. Yeah, they are not in the I can lift a fucking car group. And, and he looks like a carved statue. He does look like a statue.

And so it's just that in the shower and I'm like, our shower is too shitty for this experience. Like it's just sad. It was. It's not like a rainfall shower.

The actual shower is big, but the, the water implementation is not, it just sucks. So you guys. Use your imagination a little bit. So you guys loofied each other up.

I missed all that. I was out feeding drinks and drugs to people. I am out there talking to people, mainly my new best friend Ryan, and I'm talking to them about things that they're, they're doing and not doing in the lifestyle, and I break one of my rules apparently that I gave on. The podcast and they're like, no, no, no, you said don't do that.

I'm like, what are you talking about? I didn't say anything. She's like, no, on episode blankety blank, you said that. I'm like, stop listening to me.

Don't listen to any courses or rules or anything. This is stupid. #n classes at room 77life.com courses 1999 free trapper keeper # bring your number 2 pencil. So I'm like, alright, we gotta get this on.

I'm gonna go take a shower as well because you two hot bitches are done. I mean, in my mind you made each other come like 3 or 4 times. I don't wanna know. Let's just keep that in my mind.

But before that, what I was doing, I was giving a demonstration of how to put on a cock ring because that is what you do at my parties. And while I was showering, while you were showering, oh, I missed it. I started talking about the episode about the cock ring, and I was like, I will show you. It is in the other room.

I will bring it out now. So then I go in and I say, this is how you put it on, and I implement the procedure of how I put mine on and how mine is in fact too big for me, but I'm OK with that because it keeps it a little bit safe, right? Because they're like, we hear their horror stories. I'm like, I get it.

That's why mine's a little too big, and I'm OK with that. Like the horror stories that we. Recorded on our own on our own pod that you're telling me. I know I didn't listen to the doctor who told me not to use it on my own podcast.

Anyway, here it is on. Here's my dick card. Enjoy. So with said cock ring on, I go into the shower.

The thing about a cock ring is you don't really lose your heart on very easily. It sort of stays chubbed, very kind of erect. I go into the shower, I start showering, then he's like, Well, I'm gonna jump into the shower with Richard and Boom, I'm in this homoerotic shower with a half heart on and I see the two of you just sort of staring at me. Homoerotic situations give me a lot of adrenaline, not full on Liberace gay, right?

I'm talking about like homoerotic situations. Now in a guy, much like losing a heart on, like when you're like in and you start to get anxiety, which is part two of this story, when you start losing your heart on it snowballs, but for a guy sometimes. Getting a hard on can be the same way. Sometimes when you start to get a hard on, you're like, Oh my God, I can't stop it.

Oh my God, I can't stop it. That adrenaline can start to build up and get kind of exciting, and then you get harder and you start to get excited because that adrenaline buildup, right? So I start getting hard with him in the shower and I'm like, we'll be right back. Jared, Joe, and Christy, Sari, Khan, Tracy J, Greg, Jimbo, Shane, Adam, B and Jay trying to play, Zachary, Delani NC.

Joe, Jim, Brian, Juan, Steven, who are they? Half the new people that signed up for Room 77 Patreon. Why would they do such a thing? Because Room 77 does such positive things, Lauren.

In fact, we're gonna help them get through this sucky commercial. You're gonna tell them about all the wonderful things that they'll get at Patreon, and I'm gonna help them get through life. Are you ready? I'm ready.

All right, you go. You tell them. Access to Room 77's Telegram chat with other couples in the lifestyle and the member photo contributions. For those of you working out, don't.

Forget that core glutes. Stop staring at everybody else's and concentrate on your own. Live sessions with Richard and Lauren. That's us.

Get to know a little bit more about us each month. You're such a good driver. Look at you coming to a complete stop working that stick. This is a great ride.

I bet you give everyone a great ride. Inside peeks into room 77 headquarters. You have cleaned up this shithole really nice. I've never seen someone so dirty make something so clean.

You're like a dirty double agent. Discounts on upcoming takeovers, workshops, free OnlyFans, and the first to hear about any events. Hey, you two naked sexies, don't worry, Richard and Lauren are here with you. I think tonight's the night we all try anal.

If you want to help us keep this up, go to patreon.com/room77 and help us keep it up like these people did. Christina and Ed, Aaron, Franklin, Moses, Larry, Ali and JT, Matt SD Vega, Robert and Jessica, Otto Malin, Junior Perez, Sebastian, Dan, Steven, Donna, Brandon, Crispy, and Thanos. I can't believe Thanos is here. He's came back.

He always comes back. And I'm like, oh my God, my dick's getting hard, and I'm with a guy. I'm like, how do you get in here? How do you get in here?

So then you come in and you start soaping me up, so I wasn't showering with him with a full hard cock. Cause I was about 15 seconds away from that happening. So instigator me pops in and I start stroking both cocks like that dream that people are like, yeah, I'm skiing. So that was me with the suds and I just, I'm start milking it, right?

I'm just egging you on more because I get a rise out of teasing you. Then she comes in. This gal is so hot. I love her because she's a spinner.

I mean, she's like 3 ft tall. Honest to God, she's like she's like a pixie. I'm like I, she's adorable. So just to describe them, she's adorable like a pixie.

She's she's just a little bit bigger than Tinkerbell. She's a little bit, she's like Tinkerbell but with a really thick Boston accent. And sexy as fuck. And then he is like, how do I explain it like he looks like a criminal, but well, in a good way, but like he's like the boyish charm.

He's got tattoos all over his body. To me I felt like he looked like a, he was in a band sort of like he was sort of Green Day-ish with the spiky blonde hair and Blink 182. Sure, I don't know, tats and fit, but not like I'm all I do is work out. I just happen to be lean and like he's a pretty funny guy.

Yeah. So, uh, we jump into bed with them. The first thing I do is go over to the gal that I've wanted to do for a really long time. And when you say them, you mean all 6, all 6, all 6 were in bed.

The two are gone at this point. I go over to the gal that is the fitness model person, and I bury my entire head inside of her ass. And then I bury my fingers in there and then I'm gonna bury, um, if I could climb in there, I will. I am in heaven.

Then asshole Ryan is like, hey man, you got some lube? I'm like, uh, yeah, I got some lube. So then. I go to get the lube, but by the time I came back, her husband took my spot.

Unbelievable, greedy. So like, can't you do that at home at any other time? Any other time. You have her all of the time.

All I have is right now, and you took a check, right? So now I have to find another position. I have to find another person. So I'm pretty sure I just stuck my cock in your mouth.

Now the other people are. The Bostonians are are kind of beginners, right? So we're constantly like, are you OK? You OK?

You guys good? You guys good? You all right? You OK?

Is this, it's too much or is this slowly while we start to get things going, the fitness couple slowly starts to fade away. We're like, hey guys, what's wrong is I wanted to make sure that I was giving them enough attention. And come to find out that they were like, uh, we literally just had sex like right before we walked down the beach. So like, it's like it's way too soon.

Just had sex before we left and I'm, I'm still in a recovery period. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. And I'm like, I'm like, no worries, don't worry about it.

I'm like this is what I get for for kidnapping people. You can't, we didn't schedule it. Yeah, we didn't schedule it. This is what I get.

If I'd scheduled it and told them, then he wouldn't have had sex. I mean, he didn't even know they were gonna see us. No, so it was just completely, yeah, my fault. Uh, that one's on me.

I'll take. And then, so they leave. Now our, our bedroom now is becoming like a doctor's office. Like you come in to see us and then they go back out into the waiting room.

We're like, we'll be with you in a second. We're just gonna take care of them. So then we go back to it with the, with the Bostonians. I have a really, really large raging hard on because my cock ring is still on and I am just ready to bury my thick, what is now purple penis.

Into her tiny little tight body. So then I did. Is this OK with you guys? Are you OK with doing it?

And the whole time I'm like, I don't know if this is OK. Uh, I don't know. And then what happens is anxiety failure again, boom, another one down. Another one bites the dust.

I mean, I get it. It's, I guess with that, that end goal. Always being fucking, it doesn't necessarily have to go there, but starting off in the shower was erotic. Is this OK?

Is this OK? And then it moves to the bed. Is this OK? Is this OK?

And then it's just like they were fine with whatever, you know, but yeah, it didn't, I didn't happen for me, but it happened for you. And I just wish that he just had her and we just finished up with our significant other. Because it always makes me feel horrible. So then I just stop.

I think it starts with 8 people and ends with me alone jerking off on a bed. That's how this story ends. Just like my my doctor's office, just like my doctor's office. Yes, so strange.

Thanks, doc, but I'm good for the next 6 months. Everyone watching me come. Now, we're gonna give you the exact opposite side of this. So that starts off with 8 people, dwindles down to 6, and then 4, and then like 3, and then me.

Now we go to Temptation playground. We have a, a birthday gift for a friend, and this birthday gift is what they, she was um gonna surprise him with a bunch of ladies to tie up her. Husband and just kiss him all over, just kisses and touches and everything. He had a blindfold on.

He was tied up. He couldn't do anything. He couldn't see anything. And it was just supposed to be 3 to 4 women all over him.

We were going to enter the room. All of a sudden, all of these women were going to be on top of him. Now, we are supposed to, from in my mind, like paratroopers come in. And at the last minute, our commander, the wife, is like, company, hold.

I need to hold, hold on target. I need visual confirmation. Roger that. Roger that door is gonna be cracked.

So we wait by the door. We wound up being a little bit late. Whatever. It's like we finally got there.

It's just it wasn't our best timing. So I packed a pack. I'm like, I don't know what to bring. What do you prepare for a giant gang bang?

I don't know. And it's 7 of us, just like real world, and it is. It's 7 strangers, strangers 7 strangers in a room woohoo. Stop being polite and start getting real.

We walk into a room and the only way I can describe walking into this room is like, if you've ever been watching a film and they go from one scene and then the next scene is start the scene with a bunch of naked people and you're like, 00, what's going on here? What a party. Oh, that caught my attention, and you know they do it on purpose because it works. You're like, Oh, I'm paying attention now.

There's a bunch of naked people in this scene. So that's what we walk into, right? So he's on the bed and all of the women are on him, even though we were 3 minutes late, it felt like we were 3 hours late. I know, right?

Yeah, I'm like, All right, well, go, go do your thing. My only job. Here is film. Oh, you're supposed to videotape it.

I didn't know this, but somebody tells me videotape it. I say, OK, well, I, I will. And there's another gentleman there who is a complete stranger because we're in the real world, the sex, sex, real world. And uh we start filming right now.

You, what are you doing on the bed? Yeah, it's, it's her, her husband, and then me, a single woman and another girl, right? So there's this single woman. Four ladies on him.

Amazing. I have no idea who any of them are. I got, uh, undressed so fast, but I think I left my panties on because other people were wearing sort of sexy lingerie and, and things. So I'm like blindfolded, so it didn't really matter.

That didn't make any sense to me. Well, it looked made the, it made the film look good, I guess. I don't know. I wore overalls for him, but he was blindfolded, so it was ruined.

Just kidding. All right, go on. So I just jumped in. It was, they were still in the making out stage, right?

So, but I feel like I don't even know if you got naked as a cameraman, as a professional, as far as clothing go, did everything I was supposed to do as a cameraman and just took off my shirt and my shorts but left my underwear on. I think that's the protocol. That's what, that's what the union tells me. That's no, you are correct.

OK, that's what I thought is you come in, you remove your shirt, your, but leave your genitalia in covered and begin filming, yeah, in that order, yeah, otherwise you can get penalized. To go into time out. He's a tall drink of water. So there's plenty of him to go around.

And it could have been 9 women on him. There's still room left. Seriously, and I just adore him. I was super happy and, and there were all kinds of toys.

There was like one of those rake things and nipple clamps and dildos and like all these things. And I'm like, did the wife put all of this out? Like, are we allowed? Allowed to grab these things and like clip them or whatever.

So I'm sort of trying to ask the other girls like, are we doing like what are we doing now? The other girl is smoking hot that you're, you're with. Yeah, she, well, they both were, were hot in their own right. It's just that the single girl, I didn't feel comfortable.

I didn't know what their deal were because she didn't, she didn't really communicate much with anybody. She sort of did her own thing. I don't know. She marched to her own drum, uh, the single girl.

Slaps a condom on and starts fucking him. So that leaves me and her, you know, like we don't, we want him to enjoy the sensation of sex. So she and I start making out. I, I've never met this woman in my life and she's smoking hot and I'm just like, oh my God, your hair, your face, your body.

Oh my god, your breasts, we're just touching each other and licking each other and, you know, her hands go inside me and her fingers go inside me and I'm like. You're over and hi and is this OK? And what's your name? It's just like it was like comedy but like sensual at the same time.

Like I'm so awkward sometimes. I put my fingers inside of you, by the way, what's your name is great in any situation. Now I'm off to the side and I'm the other dude is like, hey, my battery ran out. You're in charge of video.

I'm like, Oh, this is too much responsibility for me. Now I'm the only cameraman left. Did you still have your pants on? I have my underwear on as per union rules.

Yeah, that's what I mean. So, but I can already feel the anxiety running through it's coursing through my veins, the anxiety. I can already feel my dick going, uh, Richard, we're in a code red, a code red situation. You're gonna need to abort this situation.

Get to extraction ASAP. Anyone can read this channel. Extraction point is ready. Does anybody, you had already said like, I don't know what's gonna happen.

I don't know if I'm gonna be hard while we're walking to the road, yeah, because it's a weird situation to, to walk into, right? And we didn't know if we were all gonna do orgy stuff, but at the end of the day, probably did not. You're like, well, what's gonna happen is this. Yeah, it's probably gonna go there, but it's always gonna go there.

It's gonna, it's gonna morph into some sort of orgy, and that's. That's essentially what happens and then it, it starts and I'm like it's not gonna happen and this has been like a streak for months for me of, of a lot of good times and I'm like this is it, this is the time I'm gonna, I'm gonna break my, my streak and it's gonna happen. I can feel it inside of me so I lay on the bed and um and the wife and she knows you so she's like, are you OK? Come over here and let me suck your.

And you're like, uh, I just need some time, and she gets it and she's like, All right, I'll, I'll just leave you be. So then I get on the bed and I just sort of hook up with you and I start connecting with you and I start to get hard again, right? You're welcome. Thank you.

You're good at what you do. Thank you. So then I'm hard and I can tell from my penis, mission control is like de-escalating. Down to a code yellow, weird code yellow traction point is on the weight and on the ready.

I'm like, all right, that's great, and I am hard and then that the hot, hot chick, uh, looks at me and goes, can I fuck you? And you turn to her and you're like, well, we haven't, uh, had sex yet, and I look at her and I'm like, why, yes, you can fuck me. And then later on you asked me, you're like, well, why did you say that? Because usually we have sex first.

And I said, we do under normal circumstances. But let me tell you what was happening. I was having a lot of fucking problems, and this window of me having a heart on was very, very limited. So I needed to put it inside someone very, very quickly.

So I thought, I'm gonna be very, very disappointed if that was my only chance to do it. So I was like, I'm hard right now, baby, slap that condom on me and put it inside whatever this woman's name is. It's so like as a wife, when I know that we're walking into a situation like this where you have stress and you don't know if you're going to get hard, then When you do get hard, I always feel like, oh good, you and I are gonna have sex, so it'll solidify the heart on, right? You're right.

And so with all the people happening, I didn't, I wasn't really connected, and, and that's why you had to tell me that you were like, I was this, like I said, code red mission control was like, no, no, no, not even your wife. Get just get, get out, leave your partner behind, get another hotel room. Just go next door. Yourself, comrade, get to the extraction point.

Everyone else is dead to you. That's what was happening. So even you wouldn't have been really able to, to help me out at that point. It was just like me being hard at that moment.

And, and you're like, yeah, I get, I, I get that. What happens is that opens up you both figuratively and literally to everyone else. Uh, now I'm open season, and that's sort of, you know, what happened is, you know, her husband. Just walking around the room, just fucking everybody and everything and I had tried to have sex with this woman.

I just failed miserably. I just failed miserably. And you know, I, I am not one of those people that if I have a soft penis, I am going to take 10 minutes to grind that soft penis up against your vagina. Can I take a small, like, just the more you know break?

Yes, you may because. Guys out there should know this, and it's not a big deal. We're not going to judge you whether it's, it's chubby. We know the difference between when it's chubby and hard.

If it's just chubby and you're, you're not hard, don't worry about it. Just don't try and keep shoving it in us, especially when there's a condom on because it does nothing except just chafe and it just doesn't do anything. And then you sit there and you're like, oh yeah, then it puts us in an awkward position where we're like, am I pretending? Yeah, Should I, should I make noises?

Is it gonna make them hard if I make more noises, or just, oh God, that feels so good against my labia almost inside me. Oh, your soft flaccid cock across my outer lips. Yeah, that's, that's a good message for guys. I am not that.

Guy, I'm just not gonna try to, to, to put the toothpaste back in the tube. Yeah, thank you for that. So, uh, yeah, guys, don't do that. Just say, hey, uh, it's not gonna happen.

So I fail miserably and then I go back up to like, uh, mission control, this is, we are red again, we are red, uh, back to red extraction point now. So I just, I just bail. I'm like, uh, you know what, everyone, I'm out. Everybody have fun and you guys did.

You had a lot of, you got, had sex with everybody. Everybody was fucking you. It was fun watching you be an absolute whore after not getting so much cock for so long. It was fun watching you get tossed around and used a little bit.

It felt good to be used. Yeah, I, I know it may sound weird to because we're gonna talk about that after, after we stop recording. Sounds a little weird. It's fun.

It's fun. No, I, I enjoy that. What I mean by that is I enjoy that. I just enjoy it when I'm sexually aroused.

But when you feel like you're out of the game and watching you get used, you feel like, I can't be a part of this right now. Yeah, I, I don't necessarily enjoy when you're not there. I mean, I don't. I left for 15 minutes.

Shut up. I did. I folded towels, went down to the lobby. Yeah, it's just like I enjoy it when you're there because I like, if I'm getting pounded and used, I like to hear you tell me you're getting used, you're dirty, you're the other girl's husband was doing that.

So I was kind of like a stepdad. He had stepped in. Dirty daddy stepdad or something. I don't know.

Yeah, I, I just, I just wish I was there to be able to enjoy him playing that role with me there and in the game, and I wasn't, and it's, it makes me sad. So, uh, I had to leave that situation and that's what led me to my cocaine problem later that night. That's when it all started. It all started.

So later that night we all went to dinner. I was exhausted. I was absolutely exhausted. I was gonna die and we all had to go out and party.

Someone was there and said, uh, hey Richard. I said, What? They said, Why don't you try some cocaine? I said, I, I have some Adderall in me right now.

And they said, You look like you're gonna fall down, so that's not working. Do you want, why don't you try some cocaine? And I said. Because I don't have any cocaine, and they said, we do.

And we both look at each other like they're like, I do. And I'm like, I, I don't, uh, never done cocaine. No, you're like, we've never done cocaine. They're like, what?

They looked at us like we were out of our minds. They're like, no, no, no, I know, I know it seems like we're wild and crazy guys, but, uh, nope, never did, never did cocaine. They're like, come on, it'll make you feel good, good, good, good. And I'm like, wait.

Come on, come on, this is, is it, is it gonna make me awake? And they're like, yeah, it'll help. That's why we brought it. And they're like, oh, so now you have this, this iPad that you have, and the iPad isn't what makes this really ridiculous.

It's what your iPad cover is what a toddler would put their iPad in. So it's like a, it's something so your iPad doesn't get ruined in, so if it falls, it doesn't break. But it's what a toddler, because it has a handle, right, because it has a handle, but it's what a toddler would have. It's for a child.

I bought it in the kids' department, right? So he's like, give me something like, uh, like a, like, uh, he said, do you have a table? I didn't bring my cocaine table with me. I didn't pack it.

So he's like, Well, here, we'll use this. So here's this cocaine sitting on this little child iPad. And I did, I did, I did a little bit and it, and it worked and, uh, I killed 3 people that night. We'll be right back.

Alright, Lauren, I want to talk about bikini addiction, OK? Let's do it. They are the only bikini company that really cares about you. Why do you say that?

I gotta tell you why, because they understand those bitches at the pool. You're at your lifestyle event and you're in your bikini addiction rhinestone tea bikini, right? You know the one I'm talking about. What does that one look like?

Because I just know the name because you just told me. It's the crystal tea bag. It's the one with all the diamonds on my butt, right? And they, they look at you.

They're like, Oh my God, Lauren, it's so hot. You look so good. Hurry, let's go make out. Right?

And then you go to the water park and you wear that same bikini to the water park, right? And then that same girl, she goes over to her friend and she's like, Oh my God, Karen, do you believe Lauren wore that bikini ejection tea rhinestone? What a skank. She's not good for the community or the children or the church, and we are the world, and we can't let this happen.

Hurry up. Let's go gossip. Bikini Addiction, they got ahead of the sexy curve and they solved this problem. They made the Thai side, Brazilian cut, scrunched back lined front for those moms with the Bikini Addiction suits who need a bottom to wear to the water park that looks amazing, that can tell the Karens to go F themselves.

Yes, and they line those fronts so you can't see their badge. I love it. Yeah, that's what they did. So how do they find out more about Bikini Addiction?

Go to bikiniadddiction.com and use the promo code room 7. And you'll save 10% off those new bikinis. Or if you want to get a free one, you can book a trip with us, 5 nights or more to one of these clothing optional lifestyle places, and we will give you a free bikini Addiction bikini. What else, Lauren?

Make sure to post the pics of your perky bottoms and tag Bikini Addiction with the hashtag # don't let the Karens win. We are not condoning the use of drugs at all. We've never done cocaine. We haven't done it since.

Uh, we did a tiny, tiny little bit, teeny bit like I'm. Um, uh, but I'm gonna tell you in case you, you were ever wondering, because I know you because you're me, and I'm gonna tell you what it's like, OK? So this is what happens, right? You take, uh, you take a dirty, disgusting dollar bill, you don't want to use a peso because that's gross.

You make it into a little thing and you snort it up your nose just like a, like a movie, and then there's this really Weird taste that that drips down the back of your throat. And then what happens is like, literally within 15 seconds, you're wide awake, and this is just from a little bit. Obviously, this is why it's so expensive and so addictive because it doesn't last that long. It lasts maybe 20 minutes to an hour, or maybe, maybe 2 hours, depending on how your body reacts to it, but you just Feel awake and alive and sort of confident, you know, just sort of, hey, I'm, let's go, let's go, let's let's let's do this, and that was my personal experience with it.

I thought that, uh, oh no, I'm gonna be up for the rest of the night. Yeah, so did I. I had no problems at all sleeping. I was waiting for you to like turn into Chris Farley and start sweating.

Sweating and just like like all the things and I'm like how is it how are you feeling? Does it are you like you feel super funny or like all these different things and I'm like, no, I don't. I need more. And you're like, you're not getting more, so stop it.

And I'm like, let's go score more cocaine. And he kept trying to use all the lingo. I think I need to re up. I'm like, come on, man, let's go do rails.

I just started to do a comedy routine. Come on, baby, let's go. Let's go get on that train. I mean all night long that's the worst thing that came out of the habit was my puns I was using all night all night long.

Let's go get some of that snow, baby. Yeah, so, um, that was it. I mean, a lot more anticlimactic than, than I thought it would, it would be. Well, I think I, I owe that to his wife though, because he made you like a major line and she was like, are you out of your mind?

No, they were really safe and really careful with what they did with me. I also wanted to have sex with them. This is what those bastards did. Uh, they waited until.

That we stayed out with them and danced with them all night because we were high on cocaine and then at the end of the night they were like, hey, we're gonna go to bed and we're like, No, all right, we really wanted to have sex with you. And then we would get back back to the room and they sent us a text and they're like, Hey, come to our room, and we missed it by like 20 minutes and we're like, OK, and they were already asleep. And so we woke up in the morning, we're like, Next time just fucking say, hey, we're going back to the room, come and. Yeah, not in a text.

They're like, I know, but you know, it felt weird. I'm like, oh, anyway, that was that. So finish this up. Uh, how many is too many for you?

How many is too many that you think and how many do you think is, is too many in general? What is your? What, what, first this, what is your favorite amount? 3.

Minus 3 also. No, you're copying me. It's 2 guys. That's mine.

But we've already talked about this, so I know your answer. OK, how many is too many? I think for me right now still 6 is too many, but 8 for sure. Uh, I would say, uh, I, I would say over 5 starts to be too many 5 throwing in a single, so over 6, I would say let's say over 6 starts to be too many.

Anything over 6 starts to be too many. 6 is even tough for me. Yeah, it's, it is very, very rare that you hear people. Say, you know what I really want is I want an orgy with 28 to 30 to 34 people.

That's what we're looking for. We're looking for a room filled with naked people. I mean, our, our fantasy is a stadium filled stadium filled with naked naked orginess. It's a very sort of rare thing.

So what do you hear mostly? I think that, I think most of the time it's, I think it's usually. 6. It's usually 6 like when people are like group, the group, well, we had group play, it's usually 6.

It's usually 3 couples, yeah, usually after that it's like some weird something happened that's like, oh my God, it was everybody above 8. You rarely hear. I, I don't know if I've ever heard 8 people. That's a, that's something that has to be scheduled.

Yeah, it does. It was, but I mean we had to invite people to dinner and stuff. Yeah, that's something that has to be scheduled on some level, even if it's on a poster somewhere downtown on a, on a telephone pole, it has to be scheduled like, hey, we're here, or in this room, it will be an orgy at 10 o'clock. This is what we offer to, to the people # room 77 school #77 education detention slap you with a ruler.

So, uh, this is what we offer you as the number one teaching couple. If you are thinking about doing the group thing above 4, I would say this is what we would say. These are the negatives about going into those group play things. I feel like it's always, um, you have to try and tell everyone your rules and your boundaries.

That's, that's a difficult. Thing. Everybody's rules and boundaries are, are all over the place. And it's not unless you've had a roundtable discussion, it's not something that usually you can kind of tell everyone equally.

Yeah, so if you are going into this situation, you need to know, am I all in with everybody or do I need to let everybody know, hey everybody, just so you know, I am only. Soft swap and everybody needs to know when I'm facing the other way, don't be sticking your cock inside of me. Uh, what else? Experience level.

Yeah, for sure, for sure. That's one of the other things that we run into is like you have one couple that's done it 100 times and then the other side you have a couple that's done it 1 time. So one couple is like. I'm having the best time.

And then the other couple is like, someone call 911. So there's like these different levels of reactions that are, that are going on and you have to take that into consideration that everybody mentally is not in the same place. So you have to find that, that level of comfort for, for everyone. Yeah, it, it has like.

If you're gonna go pro, you have to have everyone pro, otherwise it's just, I mean, I don't think that's true. I don't agree with that. Oh well, I do. Well then you can agree with yourself.

That's great. I agree with myself. I second that. I just, I don't think that that's, that's true.

I think you can bring someone into the fold. I just think that you as a maybe the orgy host, if that job exists, I would like to apply. You as the origin host has to maintain a comfort level for, for people to be like, hey, listen, uh, uh, Jeff and Sally here are new kid gloves, people. They're open to, to anything but kid gloves.

Yeah, but then it, and then it turns into the thing where maybe someone gets left out though, because it's like other people are like, are we going DP or this, that, and like there's cocks everywhere and the other people are like, oh. Well, that's, that's, that's on you. If you decide to go into an orgy, it's a whole different set of rules. You gotta be strong, like thick skinned to, to, to orgy.

That's a different thing. You can't be sensitive, Sally. You can't, and you gotta be comfortable enough in this situation to say, Is this OK? Is this OK, you know.

And the other thing is, the problem you start running into when it's like 6 or 8 people or 10 people is the chances of you being attracted to everybody in that. Situation when it's 4, it's easy. It's like, well, we match you up, right? The chances of you being equally attracted to everybody in that group are pretty slim.

There is going to be somebody there that you're like, uh, I like everybody here. I really don't wanna touch Kevin. Kevin's really sweaty, not a fan of sweat. It's hard, right, because now you're gonna dance around a bed because you don't want Kevin to touch you.

So what do you do in a situation like that besides give Kevin a towel. You know, I, I agree sort of with what you said about you got to be all in or all out. If you're, if you're going to try and avoid someone the whole time, I will guarantee you that someone's going to get their feelings hurt. Imagine if you were in their shoes, always is how I think of life.

And so how do you handle that? You know, don't do it. Or like, you got to play in a team with your partner so that. Never left alone.

So you gotta suck it up and say, well, guess what? Kevin's sweaty body is gonna be on my face, and that's how it's gonna be, or I'm just not gonna play in the orgy. And that's, and I gotta be an adult about it because know this, like, at some point this will happen again. It's not like I'm never gonna have this opportunity ever, ever again.

These stars will never ever line up. Here's the thing that we can count on. We are whores. We'll always be whores.

There will always be too many whores in this world. These stars will line up again. That's all you have to do is just call our friend. She can plan it for you.

Just show up. I promise you this will all happen all over again at some other point with people that perhaps you are, are attracted to, or maybe when you're feeling more comfortable or maybe when you're more drunk and you don't mind sweaty Kevin on top of you. But that is about it, Lauren. Thank you so much for, for joining me today.

I'm gonna go get some boxes, some backing tape, some bubble wrap, and, uh, we'll start breaking down this studio. Yeah, let's start breaking it down now. All right, uh, I think though our next goal is to jump into the deep, deep, deep end and see if we can't have like a 25 person orgy. Just dive in, see what that's like.

I just want, I still want like a Bukaki or gang. I, I know, but it was my birthday. I know. Again, it's not easy to line up, sister.

You said it. It will line up. It can line up. It will.

It can. It's just not easy. I, you know, I get on it, Richard. I'm trying.

All right, thank you, baby. All right, we'll see you soon. OK, uh, all right, but OK. But I, I, I don't, I don't look, I, I would love to, to set it up if any men out there want to join the gang bang Lauren train, send us a message.

I don't know when. I don't know where, but we can set it up. Uh, we will take applicants. Sure, logistically, I don't know when.

I don't know where. Yeah, it's, it's tough, but I'll start taking applicants. How many guys do you want on you? 5.

You want 5 guys. OK, so 5 guys, and you want them all. Am I included or you want me to just watch? No, no, I want you included.

So am I 6 or is it 5? You're 5. OK, so 44 guys. So we need 4 guys.

Yeah, 3 on me at all times. 2 can be like tagging, like on the bench, like tagging in, tagging out. They can be standing there stroking because I love to watch that. Yeah, it's like I just, but I want 5.

Where are you? All right, we'll put you in various positions, beds, couches, a basketball court. I don't care. Most likely be arrested.

It will look like a, a gang rape. That's what I want. I understand you want it to look like a gang rape, but we will be arrested and go to jail for gang rape, and then we'll be like, but it wasn't a gang rape. She wanted it.

She wanted it, and then the cop will say that's what they all say. All right, Lauren, we are back. We back in our brand new high state of the art studio. Well, our studio is not high.

I don't know why I said that. Hi studio, but we are here with two very good friends that aren't also hi. Well, we don't know that. Do, do you know who our friends are?

Um, is it someone naughty? It is two naughty friends of ours. Say their names, their full names. You can even show their faces on this podcast.

Oh my God, it's Scott and April. Scott and April from Naughty Jim. How are you guys? Uh, we're so good.

We love when you say our names. Scott and April, otherwise, AKA yes girl and and trunks, it's great to talk to you guys again on this podcast. The last time you were on the podcast was when we were in Antigua. We were away and you had to do the podcast because Lauren did so many drugs she lost her voice.

I don't know if it was. Drugs. That's what that's, that's, that's the story I tell everyone. That's it.

I don't even know if I did drugs there. I'll be honest. I don't think you did, but it's, it's, I, I like, I just, I'm just painting a picture. Sure, it paints me as a party girl, but speaking of going away this time, it is you guys that are going.

you are throwing a shinding that we are attending and I want to hear more about where you are taking us and other lucky individuals because Lauren and I are both frightened. We have no idea where we're going, what we're doing. I know 11 thing about this. I'm gonna be sweaty and I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be throwing spears.

And I know, and I know there's gonna be mud, and it's not coming from a spa mask. It's gonna be in places you don't want. No, no, you might want it there. You don't know.

You don't know my life. So tell everybody what the hell we're talking about. We are going to Montana. That sounds less cool than it actually is, but we are doing a naughty gym adventure trip in Montana.

Glacier National Park. We thought that it would be a great lane for us to take people on trips where there's a lot of adventure. There's physical activity. There's things that we're getting out and doing.

We've sort of built this trip around two big events. One's a Spartan mud race or obstacle course race, and one is a big hike on the last day through Glacier National Park for picture taking and, and all that kind of stuff. But there's going to be a lot of stuff in between there too. And it's just going to be a really active, fun type of, we hope, memorable trip.

So we're talking like a hotel, a lodge, villa. What kind of place are we staying at? A mountain lodge. Um, it's a beautiful place.

It has 3 big lodges on 42 acres. That's private and secluded. So it's going to be clothing optional. It's like at the foot of the mountains.

It's May 7th through the 11th. Definitely be snow caps on. The mountains, but you just never know the weather in May in Montana. There might be, we're gonna be naked in nature, and I feel like, I don't know if this is the right thing to do, but is this the right time for me to grow out my bush?

Like, I'm usually pretty clean shaven, Lauren, as are you. But do you think that maybe this is the time that we grow out our bush? I think it's time. I think we can do like a theme night like bush.

Yeah, maybe all, maybe all the guys do that. It's part of the requirement. I just feel like maybe we put flowers in our hair, and this is the time that we just go full Coachella. We can have like a bush braiding ceremony, yeah, put beads in our bush.

Can we do this? I want beads in my anal bush. All right. Oh my God, that's a whole different twist on an It sure is.

Open a store. Um, would Etsy hold something like that, anal beads? Anal bush beads, macrame anal bush bush beads. Walk us through this a little bit.

So we're all there, there's a bunch of couples that are going to be there, all lifestyle couples. Yes, so I mean, we've got some that have been, they're very new to the lifestyle, so they call themselves Vanilla-ish, which is great because it's going to be right because no one will hear them scream, right? Yeah, and there's a basement, so that's where, that's where they're staying, yeah. But you know, this is a low pressure environment.

So no, we, we've vetted everybody, we've met everybody through Zoom, so we have a really good group of people going now. Do we have to go out and hunt for our food, or we're gonna forage, we're gonna forest the food. And is this a thing where men go out and hunt for the meat and the women are back home gathering berries, or do we hire a chef? Breakfast is, uh, that's included.

That's done at the lodge. Uh, but every night we're gonna go to a different, uh, really nice restaurant in, uh, in the Glacier Park area. We'll be shuttling people out. We've got vans and stuff that we'll be driving.

Um, we'll have some meals at the lodge at the resort, and we'll have meals out in town. As far as those activities that you were talking about, one of those days is a Spartan race. That sounds incredibly homoerotic, which I'm very excited about. Uh, what, explain to people what, what a Spartan race is.

OK, so a Spartan race is a mud run. So it's the distance that we're doing is a 5K, so it's 3.1 miles. And then there's 20 obstacles along the racecourse. Um, and so, it's going to be muddy and maybe wet, and we're going to do this as a group though.

Uh, Scott and I have both run Spartans before. It's much more fun when you do it with a group because you can help each other over the obstacles. Like it might be. Monkey bars or scaling a wall or climbing under barbed wire.

If you fail an obstacle, you have to do 30 burpees. So when you do it with a group, the group can help you do those 30 burpees. So 30 people, everybody does one burpee. I love this.

I think we just do a bunch of burpees and win, and then, and then we can go back and do the obstacles for fun, right? Yeah, I like this. Obviously, I'm probably gonna be in the best shape there. I don't, I'm there to help everyone though.

You can help everyone. That's why we invited you, for your cardio. That's why we invite super happy for them. No, on an honest note, I'm already scared shitless.

Like I'm like, all right, what is my cardio regimen? How, how much time do I have? Because I got winded yesterday grabbing my socks. It's scary.

It's scary. Well, listen, the group will go at the pace of the slowest person, so at Richard's pace. All right, uh, over under, I mean, with a group like ours, what are the chances we win this thing? It exceptionally low, very low.

All right, uh, next question. What are the, what are the chances our group bags somebody from the race and brings them back and has sex with them? Much better than us winning. All right, that's, that's a bigger win though.

I feel like that's the story. That's the story you tell around the campfire. Did you win? No, Daisy's here.

Yeah, Daisy and her husband are here and we fucked the shit out of them. We should make that our one goal of the race. If somebody lands a hot cup and brings them back to the lodge with us. Does it have to be a couple?

No, OK, whatever. All right, game on. All right. You said there's a hike that we're gonna take some, some photos.

What is that an intensive hike? Do I need hiking boots? That'll be on the last day. That's our big, we're not sure of the hiking path yet because it's gonna.

Depend on the weather. If there's snow on the ground, some of the passes might be closed. So once we get closer, we'll know exactly. But I would recommend some hiking shoes and possibly some hiking boots.

Well, our goal is to hopefully avoid the necessity for hiking boots and that we can all use whatever shoes we use in the mud race. We'll be looking for trails that have the snow has melted, and most of them, I think at that time will be, but The landscape of that area, it's never been there, it looks like something off of uh Lord of the Rings. It's, it's stunningly beautiful and, uh, we're gonna go to the most beautiful areas that we can reach and take pictures and just enjoy bushy man. Look, as long as we don't have to summit anything or acclimate, I, I'm, I'm OK with that as long as I have my, my walking stick and my Sherpa, and I'm sure it.

Yeah, if it's any place worth its salt, it'll have Sherpas standing outside waiting. If not, we could pick one up when we go out in the town for dinner. Yeah, I'm sure they have, I'm sure they have Sherpas on every corner, grocery store or something. It's like Sherpas.

Excuse me, sir, are you available tomorrow? Sherpa. I need you to carry my espresso machine. Uh, one final question before we go on, on how people find out more about this.

Uh, there is one thing that, that got me very excited about this, that April. The girl told me about is she said, I will be throwing a spear. I don't know why I'm so excited about this. We actually had to go to Home Depot the other day and buy some conduit, and Lauren asked me, Do you want to practice?

And I had this incredible urge to throw that conduit. What can you tell me a little bit more about the spear throwing? It's really not as easy as it sounds to throw a spear. It's the most failed.

Obstacle, I think on the whole thing. Yeah, but they have these big hay bales with like a target on it. The spear is like a shovel handle with a spear tip, and you get one chance, and you have to lodge it into the target. The spears probably about 5 to 6 ft long.

How heavy is it? No, it's pretty light. It is pretty light. You have to throw it about 15 ft.

How do people find out more, more about? This and how they can go on this exciting, exciting trip with you guys. Uh, they go to our webpage, uh, naughtygim.com and click the link for Naughty Jim Adventures up at the top, and that'll take you to a page that describes everything about it. Or find us on Twitter at Naughty Jim or Instagram at Naughty Gym.

Awesome. I love the, the tagline that you have. What is it? No, I do.

I don't want to get it wrong. That's why I don't want to say it. It's never stopped. Never stop playing.

It's so great. It was really cute. I remember liking that in the logo. Does our team have a name?

I just have one question. No, that's a great question. Yeah, it's Naughty Naughty Jim Racers. It's NG Racers, so we didn't want to put Naughty Jim on there in case somebody was skittish about signing up on that team.

But, uh, yeah, we'll send you a link and you just go and register on our team. We're also going bowling, by the way. Nobody seems to be as excited about that as I got you when I told you I don't really know much about what's happening. Happening.

We're going bowling. Yeah, that's day two. We do a bike brewery tour, like a pub crawl on bikes, though, so that's probably safe. Oh, this gets better and better.

Uh, Scott and or April, are you strong bowlers? No, I am not. There's really not a sport I'm not good at. So yeah, oh my God, are you a better bowler or better, better at pickleball?

He had a college scholarship to bowl. That is not true. I'm not kidding. You are such a Nerd.

Oh my God. But he turned it down for a shuffleboard scholarship. No, it was tennis. It was tennis, another really cool sport.

Oh my God, you're such a geek. It's now become a passion for pickleball. So it's just one sexy thing after another. Are you still playing pickleball?

Yeah, I'm playing in the morning. Oh my God, good for me and my 80 year old friends. Naughty Jim here with us. April Scott.

Thank you so much. Thanks for having me you guys. I can't wait. I'm really excited.

Thank you so much. I wanna get. Alright, Lauren, I had a thought a little bit ago. Share it with me, Richard.

Alright, here it is. We give out card. This has to do with your gang bang, uh, thing, right? And on the card it has a QR code, right?

And it just says something on it like you've been selected. Oh my God, it sounds like squid game. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, uh, it's just like it says.

Been in private. You've been selective, right? But when we hand it to someone hot, we look at them like we're dead serious. This is dead serious Squid Game shit, you know what I mean?

Uh, I wouldn't wink. I think that's gonna send the, the wrong message like, is a flash mob about to happen because that's not the vibe we're giving. No, what's about to happen is you're gonna come on my wife's face. That's what it's about happening.

So then when they get home, right, they get the QR code and they boo doo doop. I don't know if we'll input a sound. I don't know who our software engineer is, but in my head, then they get a sound and then it opens up a maybe a hologram. I don't know.

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what we're getting, but it's like, hello and welcome to Gang bang 2022. It's like a picture of us in semi.

A risque photo, right, or a hologram, and then it's the proposal, right? And it's like if you're interested, then send something back, mister, and here are, here are the details and maybe we get a burner phone or something. Oh my God, it's, it's so MI5. Yeah, I just, I think that's the way we go with it.

OK, I like it. If anybody wants to help out with that, do it all, Kat. I need you to set that up. What I just said, set it up, uh.

Antigua, I need you all to go to Antigua, and I need you to book now. And here's why we don't have a place to live and we have to move. So I need everybody to take that off of our plate. Yeah, I can't worry about that shit.

So I'm gonna need you to stop doing whatever you're doing. Uh, I'm gonna just need you to book that trip. Let's wrap this thing up. I've waited long enough.

Uh, we have less than half left. Put a little pretty bow on it and let's just be done with it so Richard and Lauren can go find another place. To live and set up another place to record this crap. Yeah, I think that's a great idea and not too much to ask of our people.

No, I think it's reasonable. Listen, it's a good deal. It's cheaper than you could stay at the hotel without food and drink, and we get to party and be naked. Also, I just heard that they're making the private island like super, super awesome.

So I can't wait to see it. I just asked for photos today and got ignored. That's not a good sign. But, uh, but he'll send me something, I'm sure.

So, uh, but go to the website room 77life.com, check out the Antigua trip Summer bang, and join us because last year was amazing. I know that this year is going to be even more amazing. Uh-huh. Actually, if you have any travel needs for these naughty places, go to our website and use my box.

Use Lauren's box. She likes it. In fact, you've been selected. Lauren, finish it up with our special, special thanks to who?

I want to thank Joseph and Jill, Brooks, B Blow, Scott Mclovin, Genevieve, Nanaka, and Hans, RWO 325. Thank you, Brooks, who actually had a joke in this episode. I hope you know which one it is because you wrote it. Thank you for it.

We're out of here. I don't know if you'll hear us next time because at this point I don't know if the next place we have will have electricity. We can hope, we can hope so, right? I'm not living in a cenote.

I don't know. Let's do a pod. Has anybody done a podcast that is, uh, hieroglyphics yet? Every month we carve it into a cave.

I think that's nobody's done. No one's done that. Nobody's done that yet. And then we put it up on Instagram.

Boom, Gen X, bitch. That's how we do. Uh, all right, y'all. All right, Lauren, stop doing cooking like today stop or tomorrow.

Spoken. I'm so high right now. That's why I ask. Because I'm so high.

If you enjoyed this episode, make sure to go leave a positive review. For more information, go to room 77life.com. Thanks for stopping by room 77. We had a blast.

Now get your clothes and get out.